Twenty-three years tomorrow...

that my mom passed. This year, the depression started early. Maybe that's why I've been wondering why ... when's it ever going to end? Maybe never.

The little girl inside misses the mama she wishes with all her heart she had. I love you, Mama... why did you leave me so soon?!?!

(((((((((((((((((((((((( Tomi ))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Hugssss
Jean

tomi hon I really understand that. the mom we wish we had had. I am sorry you are suffering.

(((((((((Tomi))))))))

(((Tomi)))

((((((((((Tomi))))))))))

((((Tomi)))))



I came on tonight to post about missing my mama and I saw your post missing yours.

I'm afraid this is one loss that doesn't get easier with time.

You are not crying alone...

Peace,
Okie

When I lost my Mom 8 years ago and spent many mornings waking up wishing that I had not, I finally talked to my doctor (who is also a friend) and I asked him when this would get better and he said it would change but that the loss would not go away because of the special bond that exists between mothers and daughters. This made a lot of sense to me - then I did not also beat myself up for feeling the way I did - I loved my Mom and that would never change and I would always miss her but at least I would not be chastising myself for not "getting over it" the way maybe some people thought I should. Then a few years ago, I was getting ready to fly out of town and I had a dream where the plane was crashing and at first I was very afraid and then it just popped into my head "see you in a minute Mom" and I was no longer afraid in my dream and was, infact, comforted. I hope this helps you somehow.

A great big thank you to everyone that has responded to me in my grief. It surely does change but it never really gets any better.

Because of the serious issues that my mom and I had is why my depression and anxiety started days after she passed. But I just couldn't stay angry at her. I needed to remember the good times and the good things she did for me. God knows she tried! It wasn't all her fault; she'd been brainwashed quite well in her childhood.

For mothers who have a daughter like I do, that refuses to even be in the same breathing air space with me; does it make you wonder, not so much about yourself, but about THEM? I was a better mother to my kids than mine was to me, way better! But my only daughter won't have anything to do with me or allow her sons to have anything to do with me.

For all of you that have been in the same boat with me this past week, I wish you a great big silver lining to the cloud that we've been under. Give yourselves more of what good your mother gave to you... Dwell on that. Bring up the happy memories and be happy again.

((((((((( TOMI )))))))) I'm sorry I wasnt here for you this week like I should have been. Dont know if it helps or not.. but I always have you in my thoughts and prayers . I do understand your loss.. even though I grieve for the wonderful mom I had. Always good to me and supportive. Sometimes people cant see what is before them when they have that. Like your daughter.

Luv you Tomi.. I pray for peace in your life and heart.

Hugz
Beth

(((tomi))))

Beth, don't beat yourself up over it, Hon. If you haven't figured it out yet, I like to deal with this kind of thing on my own. Most of the time, just getting it out there helps a whole lot.

The day is over and I'm tackling other problems now. I may post about it just to rant. If I do, it will be in Relarionships.

{{{{{{{{{Sabrina}}}}}}}}}}}

Your hugs and spining hearts are always welcome!

(((((((((((((((((( Tomi )))))))))))))))))