dealing with suicide

I will find and post links here to help deal with suicide


http://mirror.augusta.com/stories/09...i_142683.shtml

please post responses in a new thread. thanks

www.afsp.org is a great resource

Thanks for the links. I'm still a little shaken over my sister-in-law's suicide a few months ago. She left a nine-year-old behind and it hits so close to home that my heart just aches for him.

Thank you!!!!!

Thank you very much those sites really helped my friend

Thank you for those links. I am a suicide survivor and I'm stuck in grief. I really need to get help.

Good morning everyone. I am sorry to read about your sister in law. My heart goes out to you and your family. I lost my dad in an trucking accident Sept. of 08 and then my gramma this last December. They were a huge part of my connection to my not only my dad of course, but my relatives in Kansas. (I am a child of divorce,but gramma and dad always made sure I wasn't left out or forgotten) I feel very fortunate to have had them in my life. Now without them, I am lost! The grief has been so very overwhelming at times. I just had a birthday and I knew it would of been more complete if I just could of heard their voices on the other end of the line. (LOL...sounds like a great song)

Hi everyone,
I'm very sorry for everybody who posted here, who has had a loss from suicide.

I too have had a suicide loss - my older brother in 2005. I still have a lot of grief and issues from this. I was really close to him and considered him very supportive and caring of me and kind of a "protector" for me too.

Now, he left and I'm still here. I feel a lot of things - abandoned, grief stricken, angry, etc.

So thanks for the links. I have checked out some too. Hugs to everybody here!

There are some good books out there too: one I really like is "An Empty Chair" by Sara Swan Miller - its on sibling suicide.

I'm so very sorry - hugs to you! I had my suicide loss in 2005, and had a horrible time finding resources. Glad you're here.

I'm so sorry about your sister in law! Hugs!

Thank you for the links. Was going through pictures tonight-am still very raw. Will check them out. My heart goes out to everyone here.
love and hugs
reintegrate54

Ok, so I am a survivor of suicide. In 2001, my brother suffered from depression, and had previously been hospitalised for suicide attempts. One and half months prior to his death, he'd been in ICU for a drugs overdose and had escaped without brain damage.

He took another drugs overdose, and this time he was successful. There was some evidence my Dad had tried to recsusitate him (he was a doctor). Later, at his inquest, the pathologist said it was the biggest overdose he had ever seen in his career.

My Dad didn't call anyone. Unbeknown to me he'd been fighting a case of constructive dismissal at his job and was also suffering from depression. He took an overdose of painkillers.

Some days later, when my Mother was worried because she couldn't get an answer on the phone, I opened the door to their house and found them.

If someone you love commits suicide, here are some bits of advice you might find useful.

* It's not your fault.
* That black, physical pain you feel will ease eventually.
* You may be very angry with them at times. This is normal. Don't be ashamed of it.
* Acquaintances, and sometimes even close friends will avoid you. This is because they don't know what to say, and are afraid.
* It takes time, but one day you'll wake up and it won't be your first thought. Promise.
* Just in case you missed it. It's not your fault.
* You will learn to live with it.
* If you're depressed yourself, get help.
* Be kind to yourself.

Some useful links:

http://www.uk-sobs.org.uk/
http://www.forsuicidesurvivors.com/index.html

I may add other useful bits and pieces to this thread as I think of them.

Keep well, ppl

Thanks for the links my cousin took his life last year and my father took his life last night. I just feel numb... Like it didn't happen... I'm just looking for someone to talk to in my time of need

My mum committed suicide 4 years ago and I'm still feeling lots of emotions to do with this, hurt and abandoned and lost. They are horriblle feelings to have. Part of it is still like it hasnt registered properly too.

I hear that EMDR can help you get rid of the trauma associated with this. is this true?

I'm so sorry for your loss.
Suicide is a horrible thing to have to live with. Just stay strong and talk about your feelings with people. Dont bottle them up.

Numbness is a way of coping and can be because of trauma. It doesnt mean that underneath it there wont be emotions but they will just come in time.

Thanks for the links... I am still struggling with the 2009 suicide of my ex. We were together for 7 years, and he was my first love. We had been broken up for a year when it happened, but we were still good friends... although I know he was still in love with me, and I feel beyond guilty. I didn't return his call the week before he hung himself, and I wish more than anything I could go back and call him. I know that one action didn't cause this, but it still weighs on me every day. I am happily married, and my husband continues to be supportive, but I wonder how long he will be willing to put up with it. I want to move on, and sometimes I think I have, but then the feelings return and overwhelm me, keeping me awake crying. I am so mad at him, and I am so mad at myself. His family blames me for his suicide, which makes it even worse, as I can't talk to them to learn more about his state of mind in the months preceding it. I don't know what to do. I have so many questions I know will never be answered, and I can't seem to shake the guilt, sadness, and anger I feel. Will it ever go away?

i am sorry you are going through this.

anything we can do to help you?

my sister killed herself in 1987, still can't get over it but i'm going to try the sites

My brother passed in June of 2011 less then 1 month before his 22 birthday. Like Charlie-J posted the black hole does ease up over time and I have to say Charlie-J the way you worded your list was perfect. People have mentioned these things to me but worded them differently and it made me fly over the deep end.
avlady I know I am only a little over a year out on this although I don't think we will ever "get over" losing our siblings. I think it's awesome that you are open to working through it. Please share what you learn from these sites and from your experience. Like I said I'm new at all of this and some days it's hard as I'm sure everyone here can relate to.
Thanks for reading guys.

Thanks you so much, i just came across this post now!!! Was it a response to another post i wrote? I definately want to help otheres with my story, but i find writing it here may get old and i've come a long way just since i joined a month ago. I feel for you also about your brother, i hope i can get in touch on chat or some other way i like your words, they've helped that someone is interested. avlady

This a connection network online. It's a social network for survivors of suicide. I stumbled upon it right after my brother passed. Def check it out. You can find me under the screen name: Debbie Callahan
http://connect.legacy.com/group/suicidessurvivors

Hope this helps

Thank you for sharing a good site, it is not easy in dealing suicide, we should be thankful, many of us had overcome that feeling and still continue to live.

Most of us are survivors in more then one way and sometimes I wonder if that makes it harder :/

I'm a survivor of suicide also looking for help and someone to chat with. My spouse commited suicide two years ago and I'm trying to move forward. I would like to hear how you are coping and need someone to talk to also.

SunTracker

Hello everyone. First let me say how sorry I am to hear all of your stories of your grieving the loss of your loved ones to suicide. I know how hard it is to be going through such a traumatic ordeal. My name is Arielle and I am 25 years old. I have two beautiful daughters who give me the strength to keep moving forward everyday. On December16,2013 I became a widow after my husband of 6 years committed suicide. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with in my life. I swear some days I don't even know how I have the strength to get out of bed, but then it hits me that my girls need me to be the strong mommy that they've always had. Between the grief and the guilt, it's really starting to takes it toll on me. I have never been more ready to give up then I am right now but that little bit of strength left in me, and those two sets of big brown eyes of my daughters won't let me do it. Before finding this site I really didn't know where to turn, because I am still on a waiting list for counseling. I have family and friends but it's like I don't want to be a nuisance and keep crying about the same thing to the same people. I've always been a shy and private person, so that may be another reason I find it hard talking to the people I know. Anyways I just want to say thank you to everyone who created this site and thank you to everyone who has joined this site. It feels good knowing that there are people who understands.