[emptyglass]

I was watching a late-night tv programme last night and something that was said made me think of my ex and his unfaithfulness during our relationship.

"And you're a young boy running through girl after girl after girl trying to wash your uncle's fingers off of your masculinity and absolve yourself with the blood of virgins, almost like something in a cult trying to cleanse those homosexual images out of your head." I don't know for sure that my ex was molested by a male family member but for such a long time I've wondered if he he was. I'm just feeling incredibly sad today and want so badly to contact him but know that would not be a good idea.

[Mahali]

Not really sure what to say but just wanted to let you know we care about your pain and loss.

[emptyglass]

Thanks place for responding to me and also for putting the red face on there. It could definitely trigger someone which is the last thing I want to do. I ended up calling him last night (didn't tell him about the show; really just to see how he was). I miss him so much and am still so sad after years that we couldn't make things work out. Sometimes I don't think I will ever find anyone I love as much as him.

emptyglass

[TheCheshireCat]

So sorry you're feeling that way, EmptyG. I'm glad your conversation went well, but a feeling as intense as love tends to stay around for a long time -- even when the relationship is a ghost ship sailing through memory's waters. I hope you won't give up hope on love, though; that's something I'm working on very hard myself. Thing is, in my experience, it tends to turn up through events that seem so minor at the time but somehow bring me and someone else together. I've never sought out love and been successful. Instead, I've rounded a corner too fast and bumped into it, dear friend. Cheshire Cat

[emptyglass]

Yes, your words are so true about the whole ghost ship feeling. I just loved hearing his voice and his laugh last night. I really must like to torture myself sometimes. Have made an oath that I won't drink alone ever again cuz the last time I did that was last summer; well you already know that sad story. At least this time it was beer and not tequila so I didn't get physically sick, but heartsick all over again.
Thanks so much for your kind words and thoughts.
(((((((((((((((((((cat))))))))))))))))))))))

empty

ps--mishka and simon send meows to their feline friend

[nothemama8]

emptyglass, look at the bright side your still friends and your young you have plenty of time ahead of you, a true partnership takes time, I've been married 29 yrs and honey it's been a rollercoaster at times
Angie