[SubvertNormality]

<font color="blue"> </font> I've never posted a message before, so I'll probably make a fool of myself... Anyway, my dad died when I was 7 and after that we have never spoken about him in my family. I really want to talk about him as I never really knew him, and I dont think I'm over his death. Then this time last year my best friend was killed in a car crash. My other friends dont talk about him either as it seems too sore... But I feel I'll never get over them if I dont talk about them. Can anyone please give me some advice?! I dont want to hurt anyone by talking about my dad and my friend, but I cant keep all this inside.
thanks for reading
xXx

Gosh, there is nothing more healing for grief than talking. It's really important that you have a chance to do that.

You have a couple choices. One is to try starting at school. See if you can hook up with a counselor there for an appointment. If no one at home is willing to talk, getting outside help really might be a good first step.

The other option is to approach your mom. You can take a look at this site, http://www.webhealing.com/links.html and perhaps show it to her. There is a huge list of grief resources at the bottom. Tell her you feel the need to talk about how much you miss your dad and your friend. See if she is able to talk. If she can't, ask her if she understands that you need to talk to someone, and perhaps ask if you can talk to a therapist.

The sooner you can start talking, the better!

emmy

Talking about your losses will help you heal. Please try your mom and if that doesn't work, try a counselor at school. Keep coming here because we will talk and listen to you.......Pat

[wisewoman]

i agree with the ladies above. Can you find pics of dad and remember him in that way? Is your mom up to telling you about the day you were born etc? Your friends may think that it is not okay to speak of your friend. It is so healthy to remember him outloud together. You are not hurting them by saying, hey remember when he did this when we were 11? That was so funny. That kind of stuff can be so healing. I wish you luck and by the way, we would like to hear all about your friend and whatever you remember about dad.

[SubvertNormality]

Thank you, I showed my mum this forum and she decided it was best that we talk about my dad, I've seen loads of photos of him now :-D Thank u all!
Love Raych xxxx

[mortimer]

Everything seems to start of working out now? That's good. ^__^

I hope things keep working out for you, you seem very strong, I hope you can get over this rut in your life quickly!