Empty Nest Syndrome

My older son's girlfriend lives in Texas. We are in Newfoundland, Canada. He has set a date, April 20, 5 days before his next birthday, to leave home and move to Texas. For the first move away from home, this is a doozey!
My two sons and I have been the three amigos ever since I gave birth to them. Their father left when they were only 1 and 4 years of age. They are now 19 and 22. By the time my eldest leaves in April....it will be just prior to his 23rd birthday.

This will be his last Christmas with us as a whole family. I feel so empty. This Christmas coming feels so painful. We have no money to do special things this Christmas and our jobs have us working right up to Christmas Eve or actually on Christmas Day. How do I make this holiday a special one? My younger son and I have to go to a photo booth and get some of those silly dollar pics done and keychained for him to take with him. I was thinking maybe a scrapbook of family but that would seem more appropriate to give him in April when he leaves. I am going to be in tears this Christmas. I don't know what to do for him to make it a happy one.

(((Nicks Nose)) - I haven't reached this stage with my kids but I expect it to happen. Don't have any personal advice but I imagine its more intense for a single parent who has a strong bond with their children. Yes working on Christmas certainly puts a damper as well as not having enough money. Perhaps be honest / discuss what you and your sons should do along with the expectations. Personally I feel people put way to much pressure on themselves at Christmas. You're most likely thinking this is the last Xmas and you want to make it the best....but that's not absolutely necessary. Sometimes simple is special but you all need to discuss this so no ones disappointed.

Do you have a therapist who can help you. I wonder if empty nest happens more with very devoted parents. Don't forget to give yourself a pat on the back for doing a good job as a parent. I think the scrapbook is a nice idea to give later on. The main thing is to acknowledge the feelings, stay connected after he leaves and explore this next chapter of your life.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/ar...ives-tips.html

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/john-t...b_1710478.html

My advice to you is do not get caught up in the chaos and just enjoy each other's company. My youngest son is in the Marines. On the rare occassions when we get to see him, one whole day is just dedicated to talking, relaxing and catching up. Sadly he will not be home for Christmas this year. His first Christmas away from home completely.

He had a choice to have 6 days off and come home during Christmas or get 8 in January. His father and I only get Christmas day off, whereas after Christmas we can both take time off to spend with him while he is here. My mother is mortified! She cannot understand why he decided to come home later. My point to this is that the "holiday" is the time we spend with him, not a specific day of the year. I know its easier said than done, but enjoy the time you have with him. Try not to dwell upon what it will be like once he's gone. You'll cross that bridge soon enough.

Those articles are very helpful, lynn. I didn't realize how many of those annoying thoughts come into my head and out my mouth from time to time. Thank you for the resources. They made me smile.

Excellent point AAAAA! I often forget that. You are very right. We make holidays when it fits us. Thank you so much.