Even The Professionals Have Told Me My Situation Is Hopeless!

What do you do when you are actually told by the professionals that your situation is hopeless? I am NOT suicidal, but I am highly intelligent and am able to reason.

If you look at my profile and posts, you will see what I have been dealing with since I was a child. Even the professionals admit that my case is hopeless. One of the psychiatrists I saw actually said to me “after all you’ve been through, you should have vaporized by now”!

My current therapist says, first of all, that exposure to Agent Orange during the Vietnam War (look up the horrors of this chemical weapon if you don’t know what it is) during the first few years of my life caused brain damage. Then, my parents, who never wanted me, drugged me with heavy doses of a highly toxic prescription medication (that was originally a deadly insecticide, probably in Agent Orange) for 25 years. They badly abused me in every way possible which I won’t go into here.

I have had difficulty all of my life finding and holding down a job. My parents left me in a very confused state. My current therapist says I have recurring depression and anxiety, agoraphobia, PTSD, Asperger’s, chronic fatigue syndrome and seasonal affective disorder among things because of what I have been through. She says I am entitled to disability and I am in the process of applying.

The government has made so many mistakes in my disability application that I can see why the country is in such a mess. They told me I am not entitled to disability because I have not worked 5 of the last 10 years. That is because I have been disabled since childhood and my parents were so ashamed of this that they tried to hide it and cover it up by drugging me, isolating me from the world and telling me to never tell anyone. They never claimed my disability.

I consider myself a veteran of the Vietnam War, even though I was less than 2 years old, because the military sent our whole family to the war zone. I’m sure they pumped us all full of toxic medications before sending us. Now they want to deny that I am disabled. I got the official letter of disability denial on Christmas Eve Day. They said I am not disabled and am too well educated to not be able to work. Yes, I have 2 university degrees among other qualifications, but this has nothing to do with not being able to work! I would love to be able to do meaningful work, but I am so exhausted after this battle that has lasted a lifetime, that I can’t.

On top of all this, I lived in England for 15 years with my wife and children who are British. We lived a horrible life in poverty and hunger. I returned to the US almost 3 years ago, with PTSD and my other conditions to try and find a better life for us. They are still there and I haven’t seen them since. This was due to another government mistake, this by the Immigration Department. They told me I had to return by myself, get a job that pays 10% above the poverty level and find a place to live before they could come. We now know that we could have all come over together AND received help and my wife would have just had to change her status. She already has a Green Card and has worked here and both of our children have US passports.

As I said in the beginning, I am not suicidal, but I am out of options. I have no job, no income, no place to live and have been homeless for almost 3 years. Nobody will help me except a spiritual organization who has given me a place to sleep and a little food. My mental health conditions make it very hard for me to survive on a daily basis and I am now so weak and exhausted, I am barely functioning. I can’t work, I have no income and can’t get an acceptable place to live. My mental and physical health is rapidly deteriorating and there is nothing I can do about it.

I have tried everything and even my therapist has run out of options. I don’t know what else I can do if I can’t even get disability. Even if I do get it eventually, they have told me that I would only get a maximum of $700 per month instead of the usual $2600 or so because I haven’t worked long enough. I can’t survive on $700 per month.

I don't know about health services and housing in the US; I hope someone with more knowledge chimes in and can offer some support. I just wanted to say that I'm thinking of you and hoping that someone shines a light for you soon. Take care. *hugs*

Traveller, i empathize with you, i really do. You have to file for subsidized housing to qualify to pay only 30% of your income in rent. Then you have to file for SSI, social security insurance which gives and additional about $174.00 a month, plus you qualify for free medicaid that will pay all your medical bills besides your medicare that will pay for 100% if you get both. you have to file for social security disability, and that can take up to 5 years to qualify. However, you can walk into social security and they can sign you up for it right away with a medical statement from your doctors saying you cannot work. Once you are on the system you wife can come over here on a green card and join you and so can your children for you have marriage status. Walk into a local community health team that helps clients for free, that is usually provided in the same office as your primary care physician. In our state if you cannot afford doctors you file for financial assistance. This is something that you probably need a social worker to help you file for all these things and to make them happen for you as soon as possible. I have been there and done that. I could write a book about getting disabled and qualifying in the system all the way around. Please hang in there. If you do not know where to start call your doctors and as for a free therapist or counselor and have them help you file for all that i have mentioned. Blessings and tc

Thank you. I’m glad I saw you message before it was too late. Someone put a trigger on my post, so I deleted it and emailed a moderator to delete my account. I didn’t want to upset anyone by triggering them, which I didn’t mean to do. Anyway, thank you for your message, it really helps.

Get a friend some volunteer or something are they called advocates to help you deal with SSA....It is unfortunate place to be out of options. If you are out of work find something part time, although if at least about 780 per month you can work while there is an application for SSA, but they can use your work to support a denial...It is like damned if you do damned if you don't given your situation....I wouldn't wanna even go through the questioning they are going to do when you report a lil change you make while working during the application process. Can you sweep and pick up trash, for example? It is just a matter of finding something to do.

If you don't have enough work credits, I don't believe you will ever be eligible for SSDI. It's an insurance program meaning you have to pay in to it in order to receive benefits. The alternate is SSI and state Medicaid.

I think you've received bad advice and are misinformed. $2600 isn't "typical". All SSDI income is based on how much you've paid into the program. Since you haven't paid in much, if you do happen to earn the minimum work credits, you'll still be at the very bottom in terms of income.

Did an individual case worker tell you that you were too educated to receive disability? This is entirely false! Many people of disability are highly educated.

Your case doesn't even go up for review with social security until it is determined that you've worked enough to qualify for the program. Since you don't have enough credits you were denied at the very first stage.

I encourage you to look into SSI and Medicaid.

No, you can't ever qualify for SSDI unless/until you have worked the required number of quarters for the points prior to your being diagnosed as disabled. I missed SSDI by one quarter of time, mind you I had enough points but the final points were one quarter too early for counting...

All is not lost, though I know you feel that way now.... and truly things are really tough for you now. Others have good advice for you....

...used to be you could find a free resource at the local hospital ER with the social worker. Is that still true folks? no charge and they know everyone who has programs to help everyone... The unfortunate part of this story--your story--is that it is many many more people's story now than it used to be. We can only pray that whomever gets into the White House truly fixes things and not allow they to continue as they are.

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I think hopeless may be with your attitude towards treatment or care. Though my attention span wasn't there to read your entire message I got some key points. Vet, Agent Orange, unwanted, parents abused you terribly, oh and brain damage.

Okay so you need intense therapy, group therapy, and probably some kind of medical treatment. But whatever is stopping all this lies with you. You need to figure out what you want to accomplish by seeking treatment. Do you want to feel better, live more normally, etc. Figure out your goals, list what steps you need to take to achieve them. And find someone who will help you reach them.