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Member
Member Since Jul 2008
Location: Williamson County, Texas, USA
Posts: 261
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#1
How important is it to you, for your female sexual partner to be orgasmic ?
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Member
Member Since Aug 2010
Posts: 39
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#2
I feel that seeing your partner's pleasure is a major part of sexual enjoyment, so it greatly boosts my pleasure if I can see her orgasm. It can also be physically painful for a woman to be highly aroused but stop short of orgasm, so sometimes it is really important to finish what you started
That said, I try not to be obsessive about it - if she feels she 'has' to have an orgasm to please me, it puts us both under performance pressure and that detracts from intimacy and closeness. Much as I enjoy my partner's orgasm, I love her, not her climax. It is a great expression of joy and life, but it is the cherry on top of lovemaking, not the main course. Sometimes one of us climaxes, sometimes both, sometimes neither - the important thing is that it is a fun and shared activity which brings us closer. |
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JustLikeHeaven, Timgt5, Vibe
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Member
Member Since Jul 2008
Location: Williamson County, Texas, USA
Posts: 261
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#3
Dear WolfSong,
I created a thread you can answer! http://forums.psychcentral.com/showthread.php?t=174662 Larry |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Apr 2010
Posts: 3,067
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#4
I wouldn't know.
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Anonymous32855
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Infamous Vampire Duck
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#5
If only one of us is going to have an orgasum I would prefer it to be her. I just know it's a lot harder for my wife to get there than it is for me, so I make a real effort to put her pleasure ahead of mine.
__________________ “If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. ... We need not wait to see what others do.” Gandhi |
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metamorphosis12
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#6
It's much more important to US that a woman has an orgasm than it is to women (at least that is what my female friends say).
Men tend to put alot of emphasis on her orgasm. Unlike men, women can enjoy sex without the release. SURE, they WANT to have one every time but if you are giving her what she needs (in AND out of the bedroom) then you have no problems. Increase foreplay/oral and make sure he finishes BEFORE you start....just a thought. |
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Timgt5
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Location: Southern NJ
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#7
Part of being a loving father is making sure my children are having fun. Part of being a loving husband is making sure my wife is happy...
Part of being a loving lover towards my wife is making sure she reaches orgasm. Either before, after, or at the same time as me, I don't consider it a successful sexual encounter unless she reaches orgasm. __________________ "If you're having trouble paying attention, concentrate harder!" - Dad "Depressed? Just knock it off." - Dad "That's crazy. Stop it!" - Bob Newhart |
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2012
Location: North Carolina, USA
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#8
Well, never really been in the position where it's been a problem, so to speak, but to me, it matters. I would want her to enjoy things as much as she can, and I want to be able to do that for her, you know? I've heard it repeated a lot that women don't value the big O as much as we do, but still...I want her to be able to share that with me.
__________________ The world suffers alot. Not because of the violence of bad people, but because of the silence of good people.- Napoleon Bonaparte |
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Member
Member Since Dec 2012
Location: Southern NJ
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#9
I can't say I've ever heard that women don't value an orgasm as much as we do. I do know they don't have 'em as often, and for a long time there was that whole "female orgasm myth"...
But I would think any loving husband / boyfriend would want their woman to reach as much satisfaction as possible. __________________ "If you're having trouble paying attention, concentrate harder!" - Dad "Depressed? Just knock it off." - Dad "That's crazy. Stop it!" - Bob Newhart |
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Feb 2012
Location: North Carolina, USA
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#10
Quote:
__________________ The world suffers alot. Not because of the violence of bad people, but because of the silence of good people.- Napoleon Bonaparte |
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Thor_Odinson
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#11
Her orgasm is my orgasm
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Guest
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#12
For me personally it's important cause I like being able to bring her to orgasm...to know that it was my touch or my movements or whatever combination of things that brought her to orgasm. For my ex, orgasm was the whole point of it. Sure, sometimes she would tell me me she didnt think she would have one and did, and other times she wouldn't have one at all but was very happy that she was able to satisfy me.
I suppose it really depends on the woman. But the last thing I would ever want is a dead lay. I thrived on the noises and the movements and the talk....love a woman who tells me what she wants! |
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#13
I would say it's very important for me, because I get a great feeling out of knowing that she has reached that place of pleasure. I try to make her orgasm first before doing anything for myself. Usually after that happens, she then is so happy that she then turns her attention to me and then tries to give me as much pleasure in return, all out of her own, without me even wanting/asking for/expecting it. It makes the whole overall experience just amazing.
Sadly, the only regret I have, is that I only ever have one-night stands or sex-buddy type of arrangements. There are several reasons for this, and I've never ever had a girlfriend. And, without love, the whole experience is great but not as great as it can be. I've reached a stage now where I don't even want to have sex, because I no longer get enjoyment out of it, as a matter of fact I never did. All the physical pleasure is there, but no love. |
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#14
Can't say I'm that bothered as long as I get mine. Her orgasm isn't my responsibility.
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Member
Member Since Dec 2012
Location: Southern NJ
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#15
__________________ "If you're having trouble paying attention, concentrate harder!" - Dad "Depressed? Just knock it off." - Dad "That's crazy. Stop it!" - Bob Newhart |
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Member
Member Since Mar 2012
Location: Mid-Atlantic
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#16
Quote:
I suppose in general, this question depends on if you're having sex or making love. To me, casual sex isn't much more than using her body to masturbate and her orgasm is of no consequence. If you really care for her though, you want her to get the maximum pleasure she can. BTW, even if you're in it for just your own great orgasm, there isn't one better than holding off as long as you can, and staring into her begging eyes and her grimacing face as her whole body trembles and her pulsating vagina and thrusting hips squeeze you over the edge into your own orgasm... Yeah. Hers is important. Damn, now I need a cigarette! |
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Member
Member Since Dec 2012
Location: Southern NJ
Posts: 22
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#17
Quote:
LOL! Let's all take a smoke break after that one! __________________ "If you're having trouble paying attention, concentrate harder!" - Dad "Depressed? Just knock it off." - Dad "That's crazy. Stop it!" - Bob Newhart |
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Member
Member Since Feb 2014
Location: USA
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#18
It used to be VERY important to me, however, as I have learned that now, 90% of a woman's look is fake, and 99% of what they say and feel is also fake.....I could care less if they get off, long as I do!!!
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Aug 2013
Location: Wichita, Ks
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#19
Extremely important.
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New Member
Member Since May 2014
Location: Gaithersburg
Posts: 4
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#20
I used to always worry about this before sexual experience. Once I became active in a relationship I realized how little this mattered in life outside of basic sexual desires. My partner experiences it much more than I do and I've been fortunate enough to not run into problems in this department. That said, there are so many ways to make your partner feel good there generally shouldn't be a problem achieving this (remember it is more about turn ons than just simple physical pleasure). Sex should be an experience both enjoy and you have to work at it some. If you make it all about you, it isn't going to be a good habit in the long run.
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