The more I read on about who does what, how some react to different emotions and how emotions and love have guidelines which proves them right. Is this the truth or all the truths are nothing more than someone else's ideas and ways. Why can't I be the one who is normal and the ones who don't think and act or lack things as were listed be the truth, the ones to be like, the normal ones. Maybe the ways of others in being more about somebody else then themselves or the unselfish ways that we are never compared to are the ones with real problems. I feel things, I may not see as well as the next one but does this mean I have issues. I did not wake up one day and decide to be this way, I know no one here who shares this asked for this. Life being what it is for us and therapy, medicine, psychiatrists and all else that come along really doesn't change who I am. Like I've said so many times in the past it was so much easier when I thought of myself as normal. This is what gets me now because somebody else came up with a theory that we do not fit under that category, we'll again that is someone's opinion that the public decided to believe. The only guarantee in our lives that is truly the truth is that we will all die one day and that's it. Everything else is possible and all else is from someone else's mind. I find that people with too much emotions and feelings are the ones with the real problems. It seems that these kind of ways make people weaker, more open to failure and definitely more open to being hurt to the extent that all around will be well aware. I choose my path, I make sure the outcome usually works in my favor. The game of life and how we deal with it, the ones that follow, the ones that lead, the ones that are never understood, the ones that don't come out and the list goes on and on. I see patterns which makes me understand that some of us are alike, that things do happen to create people of the same without ever meeting one another. My mind is like a game of tug of war with the constant back and forth, one feeling one moment then complete opposite the next. To even think that death is easier at times and to imagine those moments is maybe part of my normal self or my insanity. Some of us can't be understood by the masses, our ways of opening doors we only want people to see and not necessarily what's needed. To react to what's in front and set up a situation based on the moment and not the right. I learn to hate more, to become more angry, to not handle myself in way that were supposed to as we get older. I am intense with what I want and all around me know this. I am extremely selfish and worry mostly about what I need. So tell me a book says or a doctor who read many books tells me something's wrong based on a mind they cannot see, and forget being able to understand. It's not like a broken bone that is visual, you can't see my thoughts, understand my process of determining for myself. So really in many ways life is about somebody else saying something one day and it stuck for others to follow. I am who I am and maybe I can be more understanding one day but at this point what is the difference as I have been accepted and I've done ok with my ways for nearly 40 years already!!!

Well... I wanted to stab myself in the eyes repeatedly trying to infer the meaning of that emotional outpour rife with poor punctuation & absolutely no formatting separating one thought from the next. But for what it's worth, I think that we all go through [at least once] what you're going through now. Cognitive dissonance, disparity between who we think we are vs. who we are told we are. But just as you said, you've been this way for 40 years, what's a little more? You've been through enough... Pattern dictates that you'll survive this.

I write and don't look back. Reasons are so that I don't change any of my original thoughts so if you need to stab your eyes go ahead. I write for myself and don't worry about grammar and punctuation but instead a way to bring my thoughts out in a way that I won't go back and fix or change what I really feel!! Thank you for your continued support..

Understandable. Had I known that, I wouldn't have been so eager to jump for hyperbole!

Much obliged. Everyone is in need of support at one time or another.

[peacefulplace]

I was at that point not too long ago...

Life is also pain... and I figure the sooner I get on that train, the better off I'll be...
I didn't mean that in an emo way, by the way. I don't have anything against emo as well.

hugs

[ihatedepechemode]

I know nothing about emo, but life does generally involve suffering and pain. Its all about knowing whats worth going trough the suffering and pain for.

[peacefulplace]

Originally Posted by ihatedepechemode

I know nothing about emo, but life does generally involve suffering and pain. Its all about knowing whats worth going trough the suffering and pain for.

(Emo is an attitude based on that life is all about pain and suffering.)
I disagree the part where we can pick and choose what we feel like is worth undertaking, because I think it'll happen regardless and from there I guess you can try to stop it or let it run. Unless you're talking about something else, like constantly running into a wall sort of thing.

[Thorn Bird]

There is no such thing as being 'normal'!

[Atypical_Disaster]

Originally Posted by Thorn Bird

There is no such thing as being 'normal'!

So what? I don't quite understand why you felt the need to post this.

[TTTT4]

I define life as a chess game against a mysterious unamed opponnent with the people of the world being your pawns

[lostintransmutation]

Originally Posted by TTTT4

I define life as a chess game against a mysterious unamed opponnent with the people of the world being your pawns

Well chess is very black and white, isnt it.. with clearly defined ways to attack... its the perfect Narcissists game really.

Originally Posted by lostintransmutation

Well chess is very black and white, isnt it.. with clearly defined ways to attack... its the perfect Narcissists game really.

Yes black and white like we really can only see and planning every move to ultimately win. Play piece's to almost seem as we move for them just to gain what we need at the end..... CHECKMATE!!!!! Way's to move away from, somewhat.

And to think I started this thread with one of my crazy mind moments.