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#1
Oct 14, 2009, 03:35 AM
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I need help.
OCD is very severe right now in regards to intrusive, obsessive, unacceptable, distressing thoughts. One particular thought/image that has been very persistent and distressing is about a close friend of mine. I keep getting thoughts that he is... a... pedophile. sigh. I keep getting them & they distress me & I try to ignore them & avoid them & distract myself, but it seems they're always there. My close friend is NOT a pedophile. But it distresses me thinking he is one, and getting bad thoughts revolving that, and images, and just.... URGH. They're so obsessive, and so awful, and bad, and persistent, just... It's distressing me and I keep thinking that it's me thinking this & that I need to punish myself & that I'm awful and bad for thinking this & that I'm just... sigh... How do I cope with this?! What can I do?! HELP? It's making me want to kill myself or do something bad to myself. I hate this. I'm such a bad person. I'm sorry. 
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#2
Oct 14, 2009, 03:38 PM
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Sorry Pup that you're going through this.
 Thoughts are just thoughts. You can say to yourself, that's just my OCD. The mind is a machine, a tool for your use, always generating thoughts, some helpful, some random, some terrible. So you've got this tool that is your mind, and well, it generates these awful thoughts that you wish were gone. That's your tool's weakness. It's the thing you have to work with. But it's not you. And you are not evil. You don't want these thoughts. That is the proof. STOP taking the blame for them, and say, "Ugh, my OCD is awful." Not "I'm awful." You aren't your thoughts. You are no more to blame for your thoughts than you'd be to blame for an unexpected porno pop-up ad. Thinking isn't doing. Thoughts don't make things happen unless you choose to act on them.
__________________
He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away. |
 Pup
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#3
Oct 14, 2009, 04:25 PM
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thanks, i try but it is hard because i really think it is me and i get scared of these thoughts and stuff.
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#4
Oct 15, 2009, 01:25 AM
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Those thoughts aren't choices; they're just OCD popping into your head and messing with you. Jexa is right.
__________________
Maven If I had a dollar for every time I got distracted, I wish I had some ice cream. Equal Rights Are Not Special Rights  |
| Locust
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#5
Oct 15, 2009, 02:18 AM
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Pup, you seem to be the wisest of us all re this disorder. Why are the best people the ones hardest tried? I know you know this, but recognize that it's not you, it's the OCD. Does posting or tv or reading distract you enough. How about headphones? You know so much more than I, as I could tell from your advice to . . . Amanda, I think. Your advice was beautiful, and none of the ugliness is you or is in you.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((PUP)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) billieJ |
| Pup
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#6
Oct 15, 2009, 02:25 AM
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Pup, you seem to be the wisest of us all re this disorder. Why are the best people the ones hardest tried? I know you know this, but recognize that it's not you, it's the OCD. Does posting or tv or reading distract you enough. How about headphones? You know so much more than I, as I could tell from your advice to . . . Amanda, I think. Your advice was beautiful, and none of the ugliness is you or is in you.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((PUP)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) billieJ |
| Pup
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#7
Oct 15, 2009, 07:52 AM
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I saw an interview with Dr. Jeffrey Schwartz on the 2nd disc of the Aviator DVD.
Howard Hugh had OCD. Learn about Schwartz's mindfulness approach to treating it. I believe his book is entitled Brain Lock also if you would like to buy that. Hope this helps ~ Shoe http://hope4ocd.com/mindfulness.php http://www.hope4ocd.com/downloads/OCF2007_MBBT.pdf |
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#8
Oct 29, 2009, 10:37 AM
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Pup don't despair these intrusive thoughts are just convictions that us OCD sufferers are lumbered with.I still today when I drive my car feel as though I have run sombody over without knowing.......How bizzare is that......and I would have to go back and check,and thats not once only...........so when I go back and check and also inspect my car and i find nothing I realise well its my OCD, but I sincerely understand the intensity at the time. Stay focused and my recomendation is not to panisc and stay atuned with the rhythm of your breathing in these intrusive cases.
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#9
Oct 29, 2009, 11:18 AM
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A few months ago on Good Morning America they were talking aobut a new book for OCD sufferers. The book is called 'My life In Rewind' by Edward Zines an Michael Jenike. It's the story about this famous football player who has severe OCD and he had count to 1,500 before he could do anything. They showed a before and after picture - he recieved the right medication and therapy and now he functions very well. I hope you feel better.
__________________
 This is our little cutie Bella  *Practice on-line safety. *Cheaters - collecting jar of hearts. *Make your mess, your message. *"Be the change you want to see" (Gandhi) |
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#10
Oct 30, 2009, 06:03 AM
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I didn't read the book, but saw it in the bookstore and flipped through it. It's a hardcover, and it's actually called Life in Rewind: The Story of a Young Courageous Man Who Persevered Over OCD and the Harvard Doctor Who Broke All the Rules to Help Him by Terry Weible Murphy, Michael A. Jenike, and Edward E. Zine (Hardcover - April 14, 2009).
__________________
Maven If I had a dollar for every time I got distracted, I wish I had some ice cream. Equal Rights Are Not Special Rights |
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#11
Nov 06, 2009, 03:14 AM
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Pup,
I used to have OCD and now just have some tendancies. I had obsessions and related compulsions, but I also had pure-O obsessions (obsessive, intrusive thoughts without related compulsions). To me, that was the worst part of having OCD. I felt I couldn't control my own mind. I also felt concerned about some of the thoughts, and was worried that I was a bad person for having them. I didn't want people to know about some of them. Even now, while I'll admit more of them to more people, I don't want certain people to know about some of them, and want almost no one to know about a few of them. With me, these thoughts- at the time- could be very persistant also. It was difficult for me to disconnect these thoughts from who I was. It felt like they were someone else's thoughts because they were unlike me, I thought. They were at times, the very things I hated. But that's just it. These are your thoughts- and they do tell something about you. But if they are bad thoughts, they are not saying you are bad. You aren't thinking them because you're a sicko. You don't think them because you believe that way, feel that way, because you like those things, or want them, etc. OCD is fear and anxiety related, to a degree. We have obsessions that revolve around that which we worry about, fear, hate, or are repulsed by. ALSO, everyone ocassionally gets, "What if?" thoughts. Now, you know your friend isn't a pedophile. You seem very certain they aren't in your post. When your brain asked, "What if" they were, that thought repulsed you, and so it got stuck on replay. Because we obsess over things that repulse us. This then made you distressed and anxious, which made it play over even more. You didn't want to think it because it upset you to see those images in your head and because now it was making you have bad thoughts about yourself. This only ensured you would think about it even more. And if you concentrate on trying to make it go away (as I did), it will likely make it worse. Trying to distract yourself is good, I suppose, but I know you said that isn't working. Perhaps, if you could- as hard as it might be- make peace with some things related to this thought, the OCDs would ease off a bit. For example, try saying to yourself (and meaning it- that's the important part) that you know in your heart of hearts that your friend isn't a pedophile and you aren't worried about that. You know the thoughts are there because pedophilia is disturbing to you (and rightfully so), and that the thought of your friend being a pedophile is even worse (even though you know it is just a thought, and thankfully NOT a reality), and that it is also stuck in your head because it was making you feel badly about yourself and that anxiety fed it. Then acknowledge that these thoughts DON'T make you a bad person. They are stuck in your head because your brain is wired differently than most people's, making upsetting thoughts get stuck there, AND because these thoughts UPSET you. If they didn't upset you, they wouldn't be nearly as likely to get stuck there this way. They upset you because you AREN'T a bad person- because you aren't a sicko. Trust me, I've had the, "I'm a horrible person" and even the, "I'm going to hell," thoughts because of my obsessions that came from OCD. I still ocassionally get the, "Do I really feel that way" or "Do I secretly want or like this?" thought. But OCD doesn't work that way and I know it. If you can realize that these thoughts aren't about you being a bad person, it will take some of the anxiety out of the thoughts, and decrease some of that negativity associated with them (not all of it, obviously, but some) and might result in you having these thoughts less. I am no expert, but it seems to me it might help somewhat. Try to take the power out of them. Easier said than done, but I hope you can do it somewhat. Good luck.
__________________
"....I've been treated so long as if I'm becoming untouchable. I'm a slow dying flower, in the frost killing hour, the sweet turning sour & untouchable....(portion omitted)....Do you remember the way that you touched me before, all the trembling sweetness I loved and adored? Your face saving promises whispered like prayers- I don't need them."- My Skin by Natalie Merchant. “The fishermen know that the sea is dangerous and the storm terrible, but they have never found these dangers sufficient reason for remaining ashore.”- Vincent Van Gogh ""Don't talk of worlds that never were. The end is all that's ever true."- Burn by the Cure "In the end only kindness matters."- Hands by Jewel Dragons-please click so they hatch and live!    
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#12
Nov 15, 2009, 05:14 AM
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Quote:
You also have to remind your self of the truth but laugh at the faulse thought, it seems to have worked for me. laugh at how silly the thought is the science behide it has something to do with the chemical tag you brain puts on the image or thought if your anxious the brain tags it with anxiety chemical and recalls the image more and more when you get anxious when you laugh at it your brain tags it with different chemicals and it no longer gets recalled as often when you anxious you start to feel better about it. evently the strenght of the image or thought become less and less as it it starts to refiled under a new catorgry so to speck. |
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