[violetsareblue]

Bear with me, because I've never talked about this before with anyone..

But ever since I was little (probably 7 or 8 as far as my meager memory of those days go), I had...ways of...making things better. Grr see I don't know how to describe it XD. Like, when I got in trouble, I had a thing about flapping my hands around and saying certain words that would, apparently, make people forget what I had done so I wouldn't get in trouble.

In retrospect, maybe this belongs in the schizophrenia forum since it doesn't seem like OCD, but I have no idea....

And, especially when I'm stressed or when something happens, I have a lot of compulsions, like stuff to do and stuff not to do, that makes me feel better. Like, doing it would stop things from getting worse or keep me safe. That part's OCD right? *shrug*

Both parts sound like they could be OCD.
I used to touch certain things in order to prevent harm, or I'd perform certain rituals because I just felt the need to, or it would be because I was punishing myself.

If this concerns you though, you should talk to your psychiatrist about this.

[jexa]

violets, this does not sound at all like schizophrenia. It sounds like you know that this behavior doesn't make sense, and that's why you are afraid it is a delusion. If it were a delusion, you probably wouldn't call it a delusion.

I have OCD and actually mine is pretty similar to this. I jerk my head, tap on things, and repeat words to myself to "negate" thoughts that I did or said something wrong. To get a real diagnosis, though, you should probably talk to a professional. Good luck

[Perna]

It sounds to me like an anxiety problem, could be OCD or just a habit you got into, thinking and feeling as a child that it worked for you (all that mattered) but having the habit still now and knowing it doesn't really work. A therapist could help with working on the anxiety so you don't "need" the habit anymore and it can just go away as not useful; might take some time though, mine took 7-30 years to get rid of :-)

[violetsareblue]

Originally Posted by jexa

violets, this does not sound at all like schizophrenia. It sounds like you know that this behavior doesn't make sense, and that's why you are afraid it is a delusion. If it were a delusion, you probably wouldn't call it a delusion.

*nod* Sometimes doing the certain things make me feel even more anxious because logically it doesn't make sense. Not looking out the window won't stop lightning from hitting the house or whatever. And there's more, but that's the only example I can thing of right now. But I still do the compulsion stuff.

Originally Posted by Perna

It sounds to me like an anxiety problem, could be OCD or just a habit you got into, thinking and feeling as a child that it worked for you (all that mattered)

Absolutely is related to anxiety in 99% of the situations. I have bad anxiety problems, more now than in the childhood, but still..
The sad thing is that...it works/worked. Like we weren't told on in the childhood when we made that movement and said those words. Lightning didn't strike the house. Things got better. Etc etc. Was probably just normal stuff, like they decided not to get us in trouble or whatever, but still...
*shrug* haha