Shaving my head.

I'm sorry for not introducing myself in the proper forum first but I got kind of stuck. So I'll try and start by sharing little bits.

I'm in my early thirties and always been picky. I used to bite nails, now I pick scabs and pull hair.

My hair is falling out at an alarming rate. It's really disheartening. I think I lost half of it in the last year, due to the pulling and malnutrition from ED and depression, yes, I'm all kinds of disturbed. I'm taking vitamin B12 and iron supplements, no results yet, and gathering the courage to have my hormones checked.

So now I'm stuck with this incredible urge to give myself a buzzcut. I'm not well enough to go to a hairdresser. I think I need to take it all off to make me stop pulling, it might work because I learned to stop biting nails when I had my nails done for a while, they were too pretty to ruin and it was near impossible to chew through them.

But I'm hestitant because of my self esteem. A bit paranoid, I wouldn't want to feel even more gawked at. Because of the ED I'm skinny and worried that I will look sick, but the thinning hair doesn't look very healthy either. The acne scars will probably be more pronounced. On the other hand, I care less and less about being attractive. I always hated myself, so people thinking I was pretty just confused me and never caused me to appreciate myself. This could be some kind of symbolic rebirth. I just might feel really badass. And I'm really curious if he would still love me...

Thoughts? Anyone wanted or tried this? And what do you think of women with buzz- or crewcuts?

Well, I'm a woman who wears short hair. I think it looks great. But, if I wear casual or sporty clothes in particular I admit I do get a different reaction that when I dress feminine and at times it has been outright hurtful, bullying, and unpleasant. People can be bloody awful.

I would wear my hair long if I could but it has never grown longer than my collar no matter how hard I have tried.

Thanks for your reply, rcat. Looking at your picture, it sure suits you. I know there's a lot of prejudice against women who dare to cut their hair short. Like we do it to piss off men or something. I think we are not here solely for someone else to gawk at. Besides that, I can't wrap my head around bullies and the sort. I have been yelled at on the streets a lot by random strangers and always wonder, who on earth does that? Making someone you don't even know feel bad. It's either dumb or nasty people. One of the comments that stuck out most was someone shouting out their car window, 'don't look so angry!' When I had just lost my baby. Yet I was made to feel even worse because I wasn't pleasurable enough to look at.

Do you reply to those comments? I usually am too flabbergasted to say something and regret it afterwards. These people should know how it feels. But I don't want to stoop to their level either.

Haven't decided on the shaving yet. Keep looking in mirrors trying to determine how it would look. There's always cute hats and scarfs of course.

I think it's good that you are patiently deciding if you should or shouldn't. I have several times just chopped all my hair off in a passionate fit because I was so upset with it. That hasty decision always brought negative emotions.

I've actually lost a lot of hair because of medications I had to take this year, cortico-steroids mainly. Switching to "hair strengthening" shampoos has helped me a lot, at-least keep what I still have. I've also read that no matter how much you love your shampoo everyone should change to a new shampoo brand atleast once a year because it will invigorate hair.

There are some claims biotin (along with the b12) can possibly help with hair loss - it also good for nails and skin. I haven't tried that yet.

I've just recently cut my hair a little shorter (not in haste this time) and it helps hide some of the hair loss a little bit since it's not so weighed down. Light back teasing and spray help a little. Watching a lot of youtube videos to figure out how to style appropriately helped too.

It takes me an average of a week to stop stressing about a hair cut - but I think that's pretty normal, seeing yourself in a new hair cut can freak anyone out and after a week I think the hair itself sorta settles. Short hair is cute. Sometimes I get a little brought down if someone I know and respect says something that's a little less than flattering - but you just have to not let that get to you and understand that some of those off-putting comments might not even be attacks against you; people are used to seeing you one way, so if you drastically change something they too have to adjust a little bit to the new you.

I just ordered hair powder, Big + sexy brand (lol) which has really awesome reviews. I'm anxiously awaiting it's arrival in the mail. I'll report back if that helps.

Hello there. I suffer from Trichotemnomania and shaved my head for the first time back around Easter this year. It was very liberating. Will you get remarks? Yes. Will people look at you and do a double take? Yes. Will people ask odd and inappropriate questions? Absolutely. Did it bother me? A little. However, the experience of it overall has been such a learning and empowering experience that I don't regret one minute of it. Best wishes and much love to you. Whatever you do to your hair, remember you are still you. Those who truly love you won't care.

Aimee

Yep! The hair powder is really awesome! Works nice with short hair. It's helping conceal the spots more than anything has so far.

I'm male so it's not the same if I say I love shaving my hair because it helps me feel less stressed. I look a lot better with longer hair but it's a nightmare once it gets to a length - it's more stress than it's worth.

It's completely understandable regarding esteem. It's the first thing people see.. and I've had alopecia where there's bits of hair that falls out. Recent years it's been caused by a lack of B12 and B5, and vitamin D (could be a coincidence that I've had these deficiencies at the same time). It does make you feel paranoid when you go out when you have these 'holes'... shaving is too impossible as hair (elsewhere) grows back but the missing hair takes about 8 months to properly return. Even then, when the hair falls out it's completely smooth so it stands out (no follicles show)..

The only other thing I'd say is to make sure your skin on your scalp is ok. I also suffer from s-dermititis, which I didn't realise until recently and that freaks people out.

hi there i've been cutting my own hair since last spring and it's become a bit of an ocd thing for me.
after thanksgiving i cut my chin length hair into a pixie.
around new year's eve i made it even shorter.
i've never shaved my head but i've thought about it.
tbh i do like having it short. i don't like my obsession with it but i like it looking different and a little funky compared to when it was long.
i'm married to a man who prefers long hair. i was afraid he would not find me appealing anymore, but he seems to like having the easy access to my neck, and shorter hair is easier to wash so i've been bathing more which is a plus to him. i'm sure he'd rather it long but i don't think it has destroyed our relationship or anything.
like, when we visited his family after new years, initially i was going to cover it with a hat but decided not to, to kind of "own" it. it felt good. earrings look nice with short hair too.
hard to know if i am helping, i'm in a very conflicting place with this myself, but above all else, i hope you will be kind and loving to yourself no matter what your hair it's a hard thing to go through but i can understand how you may be feeling as i've been there too