[BiscuitTin]

I'm finding it difficult to get back into the swing of normal life.

Basically what happened was that I had these health 'problems' for about 7 months and I was also suffering from health anxiety, so I thought I was going to die and all that . . . and die of a pretty bad disease.

Anyway then I found out it was just a psychosomatic thing, that was the diagnosis anyway . . .

And now I'm trying to restart my life after getting the all-clear. It's been 11 months since I was cleared of anything life-threatening . . . that's more than the 7 months I spent thinking I was dying . . .

I'm thinking that I should move on now, but I don't have any motivation.

Anyone else been in a similar boat? Thoughts? Tips, advice and general input from all is welcome and appreciated.

Thanks.

'Tin.

[yutzman]

Sounds like your not really convinced that you are 'all-clear', or you would have 'moved on'. Maybe you may need 'just a little more' therapy..............

[Junerain]

What kinds of things have motivated you to feel good, in the past?

[BiscuitTin]

Originally Posted by Junerain

What kinds of things have motivated you to feel good, in the past?

Who's that in your avatar?

Things that have made me feel good in the past you mean? Or things that have motivated me to make good things happen?

[Junerain]

My avatar is how I feel, run down by life.........but not above trying to help others & listen empathetically..

Yes both, what kinds of things do you do, that improves your state of mind, that leaves you feeling positive?

[BiscuitTin]

Probably doing chores to be honest. I helped my grandmother prepare a pig for eating about a month ago. It was pretty difficult and I did it all on my own, but it was oddly satisfying. Trouble is I don't do stuff like that unless I'm backed into a corner. I see it as an unpleasant task, but I always feel better afterwards.

[NuckingFutz]

buscuit, i have been where u r. I became anxious just thinking about going back 2 work. I got some help from my states worksource commision and also the states rehabilitation commision they help with resumes, job search, vocational counceling, grants for school, and support groups for job seekers...email me if you need more info. Goodluck 2 u!

[BiscuitTin]

Thanks, I too am getting help from the state's vocational rehabilitation service . . . so far they have been pretty useless, but things should improve now that I have a permanent case manager. Maybe.

The motivation is still lacking, plus I continue to not shower or shave on a regular basis.

What kind of situation did you go through, Futz?

[eskielover]

Originally Posted by BiscuitTin

Thanks, I too am getting help from the state's vocational rehabilitation service . . . so far they have been pretty useless, but things should improve now that I have a permanent case manager. Maybe.

The motivation is still lacking, plus I continue to not shower or shave on a regular basis.

What kind of situation did you go through, Futz?

Makes more sense now that you say this....why your parent kick you our of bed for laying around until 10am......if you can't get the motivation yourself to get out do something.....they are just having to give you the kick in the rear you should be giving yourself.

You seem to have a more serious problem that you are dealing with in your mind.....your health issues that were in your mind are what you are using as your reason for not being independent.....sometimes when we really don't want to do something, our minds can take over & find some reason why we can't do something with the reason not really existing (psychosomatic) so we don't have to do something we don't want to do....leave home & get a job & become independent......when we are so afraid of doing what it is we have to do, we create situations so we don't have to do them until it's found out the reason doesn't really exist.......when the fear is so great, it causes stress which in turn either causes an illness, or in imagined illness to prevent us from having to do what we are afraid of or just don't want to do.

Sometimes therapy helps to get down to the reason for that fear....why you feel the inability to go out & be independent, to be responsible for yourself......once the reason for that becomes clear, then progress can be made to overcome the problem & get on with your life.....this post is making is much more clear why your parents are pushing you out of the house....

I hope you can resolve your internal problems that are causing you so much fear about being a responsible independent person.....sometimes there are issues where we haven't matured enough to feel ok with that.....but these are issues that only a therapist can really help with....thinking you & your family need serious help on this issue. At the age of 31, you are no longer the child you seem to want to continue to be.....like there is a fear of growing up......but as I said.....this is something only a therapist with analisys can help come up with the answer.....can only make observations & ask questions from this point of view.

Best wishes....hoping you can resolve your problem,
Debbie

[NuckingFutz]

buscuit, with my situation it was my biological family's medical health...no one seemed to be able to live past 40. I took it to mean that i would not either. I set no goals for the second half of my life. I am 47 now...so eventually i had to look at this and realize (with great struggle) that every day is a gift (even the bad days when i can't seem to get out of bed let alone shower). It is slow going, but it is going as far as rebuilding this life. Good luck to you yoda.