I woke with the worst migraine I can even ever remeber.. so i called mom, and i said "you have GOT to come over, im really sick i cant even see properly". She got mad at me for demanding her come over, yeesh. But she came over alright!

And then she proceeded to tell me my place was a dive, i am disgusting(because i hadnt cleaned from the night before, because I couldnt MOVE.) That she was going to call childrens services on me, and she cursed and screamed for over an hour. I begged her to call the ambulance it was that bad and she wouldn't LET ME. She physically kept the phone from me and told me to "shutup and go lie down, you have 20 minutes to get better and i am going to work. I cant stay here and you cant go to the hospital. I HAVE TO GO TO WORK. So shutup and lie down and get better.

Then she proceeded to call ALL MY RELATIVES and claim my house is disgusting and they should all call childrens aid too(serious? its not that bad. There are toys out and jers breakfast out, and a pile of stuff in the hallway being sorted) and proceeded to curse and scream about how i treat her so horribly and the way she was making out was that I was in someway abusing HER. Hah! I begged her to come over because i couldnt move. and i know i couldnt take care of jer. She left after i stopped throwing up and screaming in pain. Jer thankfully decided to take a nap and after ALOT of OTC meds.,urg.. its better but still there. All i wanted to do was go the five min drive to our hospital to get a shot to stop it. She actually refused me medical care and told me to shutup and lie down.

I dont even know where to start. I am really upset with her.

[susan888]

(((Rainbowzz)))

I am so sorry that she treated you like that. Migraine pain is devastating!

If I remember correctly your Mom has some psychological issues that the medical professionals have not addressed well. Is there someone else you could call?


Susan

[Porcelain_doll_2004]

oh wow, HUGs, HUGS, HUGS, HUGS!

It is not right that she refused you medical service. You deserve that!
Sending you lots of hugs! I think you have all right to be upset!

Doll

okay, warning bells going off..

i just called her and i was going to ask for an apology. Shes over there DRUNK. Off eight beer. WHO GETS DRUNK AT ONE THIRTY in the afternoon? I mean yes she is NOT stable psychologically but even SHES not usually THIS bad.

[bebop]

(((((((((bowz))))))))) honey I am so sorry! I wish I could just wrap my arms around you. maybe you need to find someone else to help you out when you need it. I am so sorry hon.

[vee_9]

Originally Posted by Rainbowzz

okay, warning bells going off..

i just called her and i was going to ask for an apology. Shes over there DRUNK. Off eight beer. WHO GETS DRUNK AT ONE THIRTY in the afternoon? I mean yes she is NOT stable psychologically but even SHES not usually THIS bad.

I don't know anything about your mother but from this topic I'm guessing that she's very dominant. I think when you're in a situation where you have a migraine you should do all you can to not call her. Obviously she didn't help this time so it's safe to say that next time will turn into another headache (excuse the pun). Love your mother, but keep her at a safe distance. Next time, there has to be someone else you can call.

And I'm sorry about the migraine's... I solely believe they're the most crippling and worst pain anyone could ever have. Hopefully your doctor will have some remedies for you! Speaking of, don't just go to the doc when you have a migraine; I would go on a day that you don't and discuss ways to prevent them or maybe some medications you could take daily that could prevent them from becoming so strong.

Best of luck to you!

I'm still not well. And i still think i should be going to the hospital. Im weak, shaky, throwing up constantly and still have that throbbing mildly in my head.

However, as it seems, my entire family is "too busy" to take me up or take care of jer. I've called everyone with a car.

So im just basically lying down as much as possible because walking makes me shaky and weak. I just worry with my HBP and mild arrythmia issues if this is something more going on. I have NEVER had a headache that bad in all my life. That i can remember anyways!

I hung up on mom the last time she called, slurring. Shes the disgusting one when she drinks.. I know that sounds harsh, but its true and our entire fam avoids her when she drinks because shes so innapropriate. apparently she drank 8 beer. She worked from 10 until around eleven thirty and had eight beer since then?? Wow, just wow. Unless maybe she was drunk this morning? I dont know.

I am just so mad, and so sick... and there is damn nothing i can do. Plus i got two calls from childrens services already saying they need to talk or visit with me. So hurrah, someone said something to them AGAIN(they are already involved both because of mom and me visiting the hospital to get meds changed a while back). YAY.

Mom said she thinks if she tells them all of my dirty laundry they will give me help so she doesnt HAVE TO. She helps me because physically i cannot clean the house all on my own. I said um, well guess what, NO THEY WONT. They will come in and say i cannot provide for him on my own and take jer away. Thats the way they are. Of course she also beleives she gave me up to cps at 12. Thats not true either, protection removed me from her care.

I am just

I think the best thing for me to do would be to move back to the city, if i could find some way to afford it.

[googley]

It sounds like you are having a horrible day. I'm sorry. I hope you're headache goes away.

[silentandscared]

sending many many hugs to both you and Jer................it sounds like you are in big of them right about now!!!!!!!!!!! take care of you and rest when you can....................dont worry about the house or laundry right now .... YOU and Jer are all that matters and as long as he is clean, feed,safe, watered and loved then You are doing an amazing job in very difficult circumstances......................REST you deserve it!!!!


leave your mother to her alcohol

Mandyxx

she just called me... shes about to walk to the liquor store and buy more. She offered to COME WATCH JEREMY FOR ME WHILE I LIE DOWN. She said she will just take her beer over. I said UM NO.! Geesh.

She also went on about how she hates the entire family and is going to move and is being reprimanded and embarassed now by the entire family. I WONDER WHY?!?!?

signed,
Still sick, Very Angry, Depressed and just discouraged!

[turquoisesea]

(((((((((((((((((((((rainbow))))))))))))))))))))))))))))0

[AAAAA]

Bowz, are you sure social services won't help you out with the cleaning thing? I was speaking to someone in chat a while back that used to come in a lot. She was Canadian and had someone come into her home from social services Mon/Wed/Fri. She wanted additional help because she was moving, they refused that, however she definately had in home help three days a week. Had a bad back or something as I recall.

The migraines you wake up with are the WORST. I would definately discuss it with the doctor. I have immotrex (sp) and maxalt in my nightstand drawer so I can find them with my eyes closed. My daughter takes topamax on a daily basis to keep hers under control.

I'm so sorry that your mother has let you down again. Don't you have any other family or friends that can help you out in situations like this? Forgive me for voicing my opinion on the subject, but your mother strikes me as a very manipulative and self centered woman. She only wants you when you can do something for her and she seems hell bent on destroying her life and taking you with her. Bless you for continuing to give her the benefit of the doubt but I think you need to establish a better irl support system.

[(JD)]

I know migraine meds are expensive, but they work quickly. Migraines do more to the body than "just" give you pain. Please talk to the doctor about them.

Now, one thing that is cheapo that helps with migraine pain is ginger. IN ANY FORM... the first time I tried this all we had was ground ginger in a spice can... but we boiled it up in hot water and I drank it like a cup of coffee... even though much of it floated on top...and voila! it worked!

But ginger ale, ginger root, ...anything with ginger in it... will help.

You might also check in to the herbs for hormone regulation... (which can cause migraines when out of whack.) EPO, Cohosh etc all can help with this.



Sorry about your mum. Sigh.

[Christina86]

Move. As soon as you can afford it, move to the city, into an apartment or wherever you can afford. You need to be away from your mother who is clearly short a few marbles somewhere. (Sorry, I'm a bit harsh when friends are hurting)

(((((((((Bowzz)))))))))))))

Poor lady... what about making friends with the neighbours so you can call them nexttime? Or someone else nearby? Anyone seems better than calling your mother ... she has issues that need to be resolved, and you really need to avoid her for your own good. I know that's hard, but sometimes is needed.

[Tumnus]

((((((bowz)))))

I gotta get back to cleaning but I wanted to say I'm sorry for such a crappy day!

[hurtingintn]

just my 2 cents worth but...your mom is a grown woman and can handle and take care of herself...you need to focus on you and your son..you both deserve it,..take good care of you a jer

[kebsfroggy]

So sorry you are having such a terrible day. Since your family is so unreliable can't you talk to social services about what you should do under such circumstances?

I'm very sorry you are feeling so bad. I have had that kind of pain where you just can't move. It is horrible and no OTC drugs help.

Sure hope you find a way out soon.


kebs

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((((( Rainbowzz ))))))))))))))

Originally Posted by _Sky

I know migraine meds are expensive, but they work quickly. Migraines do more to the body than "just" give you pain. Please talk to the doctor about them.

Now, one thing that is cheapo that helps with migraine pain is ginger. IN ANY FORM... the first time I tried this all we had was ground ginger in a spice can... but we boiled it up in hot water and I drank it like a cup of coffee... even though much of it floated on top...and voila! it worked!

But ginger ale, ginger root, ...anything with ginger in it... will help.

You might also check in to the herbs for hormone regulation... (which can cause migraines when out of whack.) EPO, Cohosh etc all can help with this.



Sorry about your mum. Sigh.

Its a very good thought, and if they worked and I could take them, it would be covered...
Sadly however, the triptans do not work with all the seretonin drugs im on..(im actually on both effexor and nortryptiline)Imitrex made my heart go into SVT twice..neurontin and lyrica have done NOTHING for me. The ironic thing is both my beta blocker and my nortryptiline are considered migraine preventative.

The herbs are a GREAT idea. I really should try that. I'll have to check with the medications im on if they are ok, but thats a great first line to try.

I have ginger tea with lemon i dont know if its real ginger, but it sure helped me when i was preggers. I can try that again!

Originally Posted by AAAAA

Bowz, are you sure social services won't help you out with the cleaning thing? I was speaking to someone in chat a while back that used to come in a lot. She was Canadian and had someone come into her home from social services Mon/Wed/Fri. She wanted additional help because she was moving, they refused that, however she definately had in home help three days a week. Had a bad back or something as I recall.


I'll double check on that. The last time I was told I could only get a CCA in to help with housework once every.. i think it was week but maybe 2 weeks, and only help with bathroom, floors, and making bed.
The migraines you wake up with are the WORST. I would definately discuss it with the doctor. I have immotrex (sp) and maxalt in my nightstand drawer so I can find them with my eyes closed. My daughter takes topamax on a daily basis to keep hers under control.

yeah, unfortunately all of those drugs are a nogo with me Imitrex and other drugs of that class cause my SVT to flare up and i get heart rates in the 200s..so not allowed that one. Maxalt i cant remember if i tried it but that is the same type of drug no?

I'm so sorry that your mother has let you down again. Don't you have any other family or friends that can help you out in situations like this?

Here is the thing. When i had to move out from my ex's, everyone in the family said come home! comehome! we will help you.. then when I got sick it dwindled and now its RARE for anyone to help me.
Forgive me for voicing my opinion on the subject, but your mother strikes me as a very manipulative and self centered woman. She only wants you when you can do something for her and she seems hell bent on destroying her life and taking you with her. Bless you for continuing to give her the benefit of the doubt but I think you need to establish a better irl support system.

Totally agree, being in a tiny village with mom next door is AWFUL. And NOONE IN THIS FAMILY WILL DO ANYTHING ABOUT HER. "oh just leave her alone shes sick".. yet if i acted like that they would have my child taken away and have me hospitalized! Its a nasty double standard. Its not so much that im giving her the benefit of the doubt, but that shes the onlyperson who iswilling to help me now.. where I am. I dont have friends here, and family seems to be slowly easing out of helping me.. they always complain when i need to ask for a ride somewhere or say they are too busy.

Ihonestly am thinking of claiming mom is abusive and asking Social services if they will fund a move away from her.

Originally Posted by hurtingintn

just my 2 cents worth but...your mom is a grown woman and can handle and take care of herself...you need to focus on you and your son..you both deserve it,..take good care of you a jer

well hehe. I dont really agree! mom is a grown woman but she CANT take care of herself.. see the problem is she has brain trauma/damage from having menengitis 8 times between 3 and 27.. she had a hole in her inner ear leading directly to her brain.. but also as she is aging she is getting more and more mentally unwell,and also is losing her memory/and or getting senile. We think anyways. Personally i think that she would do so well in the apartments for seniors under the old folks home - she can still take care of herself but there there are nurses upstairs if she needs help or goes into one of her suicidal fits.

Your right i do need to focus on me and jer, and i do, but being disabled in the home sucks.. and as i said before family seems more and more to not want to help me and avoid it.

See if i moved back to city i would have friends around me to help..

[AAAAA]

Maxalt is not in the same class as the immatrex. It does not affect your heart rate and blood pressure like the others (I have the same problem, I'm not supposed to take them because of the blood pressure and heart rate thing. But too bad.) It was only effective for me for about 8 months, after that I might just as well take excederin.

There are also different beta blockers that they can put you on that are heart healthy (actually heart drugs that were found to decrease the occurance of migraines and an unexpected side effect). I find that mine are more likely to occur during the week before my period.

As I said, my daughter has had a great deal of success with topamax, that does not act the same way either. It also had the benefit of helping her lose the last 20lbs she wanted to. When she does get a migraine these days, they're not as severe but she still has meds for the nausea and some new form of anti inflamatory for pain.

I got interested and checked into the maxalt...

Unfortunately it too is a nono.. Its a triptan, and im on too many SSRI's/SNRI's/Trycyclics to take a triptan, and doc is not willing to chance putting me into seretonin syndrome Icant catch a break lol.

yeah according to the doc my current beta blocker IS a migraine preventative..But maybe a changle to propanalol or clonidine would be better than the metoprolol.. I have to be careful with all of this because anti arrythmics can actually CAUSE an arrythmia if its too much for your system. I hate the thought of having to go through all the cardiac tests AGAIN for a diff med and then to make sure its ok.. but it might be worth it.

I'll mentionthe topamax to the doc, but from everything I have read they say not to take it with both nortriptyline, or seroquel, which im on both..

But its worth asking I'd say.

[(JD)]

Rainbowzz, are you sure it was "just" a terrible migraine? If you are already on a migraine inhibitor, and you had such a bad experience, maybe it was something more. I'm hoping the doctors asked you plenty of questions.

Plus, why not have your eyes examined, to be sure? Plus, eye doctors can often see what else is going on in the body (mini check up.)