Well got him to the Hospital

thunderbear · Sep 03, 2009, 08:21 AM

Well I got my husband to go to the hospital. The docs there are so wonderful. They told us the other hospital does everything by computer and the nursess and docs don't communicate

That's scary. Well anyway he was swelling because of his hiatial hernia. And the infection was in his tube that carries his sperm from his prostate or something like that. I don't know male anatomy that well. But now I'm freaking out cause that sounds like an STD. The doc said no it's just like when a woman gets a UTI and it's caused by bacterial infections. But then I read the discharge papers and it has an explanation of the diagnosis. It's called Epidiymitis. And the three causes of it are bacterial infection, traums to the testicle and stds. OMG

I don't know if it is an STD. I don't hurt anywhere (well my back and neck but thats an old injury). Now my gay friend is like "I know a guy who had it and it's cause he had clap and they can't fing clap in blood" GRRRR..... I can't breathe

VickiesPath · Sep 03, 2009, 08:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thunderbear

Well I got my husband to go to the hospital. The docs there are so wonderful. They told us the other hospital does everything by computer and the nursess and docs don't communicate

That's scary. Well anyway he was swelling because of his hiatial hernia. And the infection was in his tube that carries his sperm from his prostate or something like that. I don't know male anatomy that well. But now I'm freaking out cause that sounds like an STD. The doc said no it's just like when a woman gets a UTI and it's caused by bacterial infections. But then I read the discharge papers and it has an explanation of the diagnosis. It's called Epidiymitis. And the three causes of it are bacterial infection, traums to the testicle and stds. OMG

I don't know if it is an STD. I don't hurt anywhere (well my back and neck but thats an old injury). Now my gay friend is like "I know a guy who had it and it's cause he had clap and they can't fing clap in blood" GRRRR..... I can't breathe

Oh, gosh, Thunderbear.....calm down, sweetheart. You can't stress out now. Keep yourself together. You can handle whatever it is or whatever comes down the pike from now on. Hang in there. My prayers and thoughts are with you.

Naturefreak · Sep 03, 2009, 08:31 AM

Good news that you got him to go T-bear .
Now it's up to the doctors.
I'm hoping he has a quick recovery and I hope you don't worry too much . I know that is so hard to do .
Keep us all posted .........................Take Care

babyfairyfifi · Sep 03, 2009, 09:04 AM

I'm wondering why you are ignoring the other two possible causes and focusing purely on the 1 in 3 option of STD?
It's a bit like you getting Thrush ( Candida infection) or BV ( Bacterial Vaginosis both of which are common female infections that are caused by ph inbalances mainly but can rarely be sexually transmitted as well) and your hubby worrying if you've cheated.

It's not the time or place my love. If you over accuse someone of doing something, even if they're innocent, it can end up driving them away.
There's a two in three chance that it has an entirely innocent cause. Hold on to that.

I'm glad he's getting medical attention and is on his way to healing.
Save your anxieties for another time.

(JD) · Sep 03, 2009, 09:09 AM

If he had an STD aren't the doctors required to tell you, too?

Worrying about past won't help now. Focus on today. If you're wrong with your suspicions, it may ruin what you do have.

thunderbear · Sep 03, 2009, 09:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by babyfairyfifi

I'm wondering why you are ignoring the other two possible causes and focusing purely on the 1 in 3 option of STD?
It's a bit like you getting Thrush ( Candida infection) or BV ( Bacterial Vaginosis both of which are common female infections that are caused by ph inbalances mainly but can rarely be sexually transmitted as well) and your hubby worrying if you've cheated.

It's not the time or place my love. If you over accuse someone of doing something, even if they're innocent, it can end up driving them away.
There's a two in three chance that it has an entirely innocent cause. Hold on to that.

I'm glad he's getting medical attention and is on his way to healing.
Save your anxieties for another time.

Well me and him split about 3 years ago and I was the cheater. But there's nothing going on with me. I think it's my stupid OCD making me think this and only targetting the cause as std

Sabrina · Sep 03, 2009, 09:48 AM

Hoping for you that it all works out and that your husband is well on his way to recovery.

babyfairyfifi · Sep 03, 2009, 10:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thunderbear

Well me and him split about 3 years ago and I was the cheater. But there's nothing going on with me. I think it's my stupid OCD making me think this and only targetting the cause as std

It's very understandable that you may be fearful of your husband cheating knowing you feel that you were the cause of the split through your cheating.
It's classic projection.

It may help you to chat to someone about that time in your life and explore your feelings to be enable you to move forward without the burden and baggage of guilt, as it can easily impact on your future relationships if left unresolved. ( as you are experiencing currently).

Be kind to yourself hunny. We all make mistakes and bad choices in life. It doesn't mean we can't move on from them.

Seabirdanne · Sep 03, 2009, 10:12 AM

Way to go, Thunderbear. I'm so glad you got your husband to a hospital where you are both being treated better. And I think Babyfairyfifi's advice is very, very good. Things are better now; go with that for a while.

Sep 03, 2009, 12:00 PM

The Dr SAID it was NOT an STD, he may not have to tell you he has one but I am sure he is not allowed to lie and tell you it isnt when it fact it is....

So I am positive it is NOT an STD however I will google and see if I can find anything about it.

Sep 03, 2009, 12:04 PM

[edit] Causes

Infection is the most common cause of epididymitis. The bacteria in the urethra back-track through the urinary and reproductive structures to the epididymis. There can be associated urethritis (inflammation of the urethra). Rarely, the infection reaches the epididymis via the bloodstream.
In sexually active men, Chlamydia trachomatis is responsible for two-thirds of cases, followed by Neisseria gonorrhoeae and E. coli (or other bacteria that cause urinary tract infection). Particularly among men over age 35 in whom the cause is E. coli, epididymitis is commonly due to urinary tract obstruction.[1] Less common microbes include Ureaplasma, Mycobacterium, and cytomegalovirus, or Cryptococcus in patients with HIV infection. E. coli is more common in boys before puberty, the elderly and homosexual men.
Non-infectious causes are also possible. Reflux of sterile urine (urine without bacteria) through the ejaculatory ducts may cause inflammation with obstruction. In children, it may be a response following an infection with enterovirus, adenovirus or Mycoplasma pneumoniae.
Epididymitis can also be caused by genito-urinary surgery, including prostatectomy and urinary catheterization. Congestive epididymitis is a long-term complication of vasectomy.[2][3] Chemical epididymitis may also result from drugs such as amiodarone.[4]

thunderbear · Sep 03, 2009, 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by babyfairyfifi

It's very understandable that you may be fearful of your husband cheating knowing you feel that you were the cause of the split through your cheating.
It's classic projection.

It may help you to chat to someone about that time in your life and explore your feelings to be enable you to move forward without the burden and baggage of guilt, as it can easily impact on your future relationships if left unresolved. ( as you are experiencing currently).

Be kind to yourself hunny. We all make mistakes and bad choices in life. It doesn't mean we can't move on from them.

Well I'm not at all fearful of my husband cheating on me. I know he would never do that. Our split was caused by my relapse on methamphetimine. I cheated about 3 weeks after he kicked me out over my relapse. I do though feel quilty about the affair. But everytime I bring it up to him to talk about my feelings he shuts down and does'nt talk. But as far as me worried about his cheating, I'm not. I trust him.

babyfairyfifi · Sep 03, 2009, 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thunderbear

Well I'm not at all fearful of my husband cheating on me. I know he would never do that. Our split was caused by my relapse on methamphetimine. I cheated about 3 weeks after he kicked me out over my relapse. I do though feel quilty about the affair. But everytime I bring it up to him to talk about my feelings he shuts down and does'nt talk. But as far as me worried about his cheating, I'm not. I trust him.

Maybe your husband isn't the right person to talk to about your feelings over that particular incident? He has too much of his own feelings wrapped up in it , it may be too painful for him to listen, hence him shutting down and not talking. It would be a good thing to talk to your therapist about maybe?

I'm glad you feel able to trust your husband. That is very positive.

thunderbear · Sep 03, 2009, 03:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by babyfairyfifi

Maybe your husband isn't the right person to talk to about your feelings over that particular incident? He has too much of his own feelings wrapped up in it , it may be too painful for him to listen, hence him shutting down and not talking. It would be a good thing to talk to your therapist about maybe?

I'm glad you feel able to trust your husband. That is very positive.

Yeah I've tried talking to a therapist. She just sat nodding and writting in her notebook lol . Hopefully my new therapist will be able to help. It's a guy. So mabye he can hep me understand it from a man's POV. I tried talking to my sister but she sides with my husband just like everyone else does. I'm veiwed as the bad one in this. Oh well been like this for 3 years. I'm kinda used to it

babyfairyfifi · Sep 03, 2009, 05:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thunderbear

Yeah I've tried talking to a therapist. She just sat nodding and writting in her notebook lol . Hopefully my new therapist will be able to help. It's a guy. So mabye he can hep me understand it from a man's POV. I tried talking to my sister but she sides with my husband just like everyone else does. I'm veiwed as the bad one in this. Oh well been like this for 3 years. I'm kinda used to it

Finding the right therapist is key, it's all about the trust relationship.
A good therapist shouldn't offer you advice but should help you explore your own feelings and make your own connections and revelations.
We all have our own answers to our problems, it just takes finding the right therapist to help you unravel them.

Good luck hunny.

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Well got him to the Hospital

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