I have no backbone

A few weeks ago I had made a post about my current job situation. I emailed them with ADA guidelines and they have asked me to get a letter from my therapist and psychiatrist.

Anyway, basically since being off from work I have been feeling a sense of freedom. Its been nice. I feel like one of the big anxiety sources in my life has been put on the back burner pending the documents from my T and PDoc.

Well on Thursday I got a wild hair up my butt and decided I was gonna put an end to the madness once and for all and email my job and tell them that I wasnt coming back at all. Well my email didnt exactly come across saying I wasnt coming back, it was more me venting my feelings about how I was overworked, working 45-50 work weeks and doing the job of 2 ppl and getting no appreciation or thanks for the job I had been doing for years. I guess the email was pretty harsh but at the same time, I needed to say these things so they understand that they have been putting my under so much stress and causing me a tremendous amount of anxiety. Well my boss called me on Friday and left a message for me to call her back. I also received an email from the Director of Human Resources that states that I am still considered an "active" employee until they receive the recomendations from my T and Pdoc. WTH. I cant even quit right. So I called my boss back on Friday and left a message that I received her message and to call me back.
She called me twice today. I called her back and she said that I needed to look for other Clinicians to handle my care because my current T and Pdoc arnt doing it for me. I mean Who the hell is she to say those things. She said that perhaps I need in patient care. I was like WHY? She said to get your sleep problems under control. I told her that can be handled at home not inpatient. Besides the fact that I have 3 children and a household to run. She also tells me that they have no part time positions and that if they were to create something for me then that leaves them wide open for others to asked for accomadations also and it might cause a big up roar. This pisses me off not too mention, I am under enough stress and to hear this from her is causing me more anxiety. SHEEEEESH. I dont want to explain to her the in and outs of my mental illness and shouldnt have too. I only need to keep the Human Resources Director informed and she can advise my boss. I already embarressed enough.

I talked to my T about it today. I feel unresolved about it and torn. A big part of me know that this job is causing me so much stress and anxiety that its not good for me. The other part of me thinks that I have been there so long that I know the job and I am comfortable with my ability to perform it but lately I havent even been able to do that. I need a break. A break from being so structured in my own life. Since I was 21 I have raised my 2 oldest children alone but working as much as I could with out the help of my ex husband. I remarried and had my son. even then though, I still was the "bread winner". I had to work a full time job plus overtime to make sure the mortgage, cable, gas, phone, electric, car payments, insurance, cell phones and every other bill that needs to be paid was paid. I have always been on time with all my bills and now, I feel like I need a break. I'm tired and I just need a break.

I feel like I'm all over the place and that I cant figure out what I need to do cause I am confused.

Im angry and Im rambling. Sorry

((((((((((((Jen))))))))))

No wonder you're so stressed. I hope this all gets straightened out for you soon.

Please get an advocate before you take another step. Call legal aide. it doesn't settle well in my tummy what this boss is saying. Know your rights, don't speak with them until you have a plan. Goodluck.

(((((((((( jen )))))))))))) sry

i really don't like what your boss said. get someone, as suggested above, to be on your side. something stinks here....xoxoxo pat

Contact the ADA directly and SPEAK to someone. The comments may be a form of retaliation attempt/fending you off...

I'm sorry things didn't come out the way you thought you had designed... sure can understand that that happens...

I think you're showing some backbone here... you're still fighting for what you think you want. I hope you can find some resolution to what you need and what you want and all that.

Thank you.

(((((((((((((((Shirley)))))))))))))))

((((((((((((((((((WW))))))))))))))))))))

((((((((((((((Eva)))))))))))))))))))))))))

((((((((((((((((((((Pat)))))))))))))))))))))

(((((((((((((((Sky)))))))))))))))))))))))

I appreciate your input. I will contact the ADA to see where I should go from here.

Good luck, jmo! When I decided to quit my job a few weeks ago, I DID feel a huge sense of relief! Of course, i have had plenty of anxiety since then, feelings of worthlessness, etc. But I still think it was a good idea (both my t and rheumatologist recommended it.) I agree with the others, it sounds like they are not following the ADA guidelines. Don't allow this to happen. I think if I had pursued it I probably could have gotten the shortened hours I needed, but I didn't look into it. You are already in it, so keep going! Best of luck to you, and I wish you the strength you need to go ahead with it. HUGS!

(((((((((((((((((((((Comp)))))))))))))))))))))))

Your a wonderful friend. Thank you for your support, it means alot to me.

Back at ya!! (((((((((((((((((((jen)))))))))))))))

EWWWWWWWWW - that boss makes my skin crawl! What exactly are HER qualifications for saying you need a new T or PDoc????????? YIKES !

Just a thought here - but IF you are "let go" from a job due to an illness , that would possibly give you the opportunity to get Unemployment, and it would certainly aid you in getting Disability.....which you might want to look into anyway - to help with the bills. Perhaps this "boss" was trying to protect the company from higher Unemployment fees ???

It sounds as though since you are still considered an active employee, and absent from work - there are 2 things happening.......#1. You should be getting paid #2. It will look really bad on your work record that you are missing work - even though you have TRIED to quit!

I agree with above - call ADA and get someone to be your voice with your "boss" and be sure your rights are not being violated. You might want to ask them ADA if they could use copies of the E-mails that have been sent.

I also responded to your other post about this issue - take care of YOU !!!! You know how to reach me if u want or need too ! Good luck !

((((((((((((((((Parker)))))))))))))))

Thank you for your input. I always appreciate what you have to say. BTW, I was resting today when you called. LOL. I will PM you as I saw my PDoc today and got more info from her.

(((((((((((((Parker))))))))))))))

Ok...this is a slightjack

(Jen - I love coming here everyday and seeing what your Avatar & Sigs are going to be.)

How awful !! What a clueless person your boss is. Can you apply for FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act) to take care of yourself ?? If so, then you would only have to deal with the HR dept and can skip the boss.

I am using intermitent FMLA time to take care of my son. I only need to inform my boss as soon as I can when I need to take time off and I only need to say that it is an FMLA covered time. I do have to fill out a time sheet saying what the time was used towards and send to HR- but the boss does not have access to that info and is not even allowed to ask. I can choose to discuss the matter but I am not required to do so.

I hope it works out for you so that you do not have to endure any more thoughtless comments be someone who obviously doesn't have a clue.

((((((((((((((SCHATZE))))))))))))))

I like to keep ya on your toes.

Peanuts,

Thank you for your reply. I have exhausted my FMLA leave already so that is no longer an option for me. I will see what my Pdoc and T have to say and go from there. Thank you Peanut. I hate that my boss is aware of all that is going on with me. I hate it. From now on I will deal directly with the human resources department.

Maybe you can qualify for long term disability ?? Usually short term is about 90 days (which is the same for FMLA). Some companies offer long-term disability. Your company might have info about benefits in a booklet or something that can be sent to you for review. Some companies actually have a dept within HR that is dedicated to administering the FMLA, short & long term disability leaves. Did you have a specific person administering your FMLA ?? If so, perhaps that person can get the paperwork necessary.

Good luck to you,