[Miss_A]

Hi, I've found a safe forum to use. There are really not a forum for my age group that is like this! I know that I'm like the younest here, but I can be mature about stuff. My mum knows I go on a forum and she doesn't really mind as long as I don't give out personal information. I've made a poll with I want to see how maybe people think what age is best for these forums. I'm 14 soon going to be 15 just hoping that I'm allowed to stay here!

[eskielover]

I want you to know that the choice of 16 yrs is not to eliminate you at 14 yrs. If you are having problems that fit into the forum then it is appropriate. It just seems that 16 yr olds are usually at the age where they realize & can define the problems they are having. I know that problems are starting at a much younger age than ever in the past & younger people are just as in need of support as older people.

The important thing is that at whatever age, it is important to be mature enough to accept the comments that are provided & hopefully be able to take them into consideration on how they are able to help with the problem. I would think the younger you are, the more it would be like listening to your parents but sometimes when it comes from someone other than family it makes more sense...I know I hated listening to my parents because I didn't think they knew anything....when others I respected said something, I was more willing to listen.
That is why it really depends on the person as to what age they are mature enough to become part of a forum like this. Of course the bad part of the forum for any age actually is that it seems like the negative feelings & experiences are more previlent than the positive & it really is the positive that will make changes in a situation.

Debbie

[Kathyanita]

Miss_A
just keep in mind always that you are reading adults at various ages of our own regression and maturity and cognition- so that we are in no way a benchmark or model of functional adult behavior at all times. . .we don't say things to each other , in general , that are overtly wrong and with intentional malice-
however, that does not equate with being specifically right or correct or harmless. . .
do what you do in the creative forum- you do that so well and we enjoy your writing. . .for mental health advice seek out the mentally healthy to follow. . .

[Miss_A]

I understand that I'm reading real life experiences and I'm not making anything up when I post a problem. I've actually been quite good to myslef lately and others. But its just a downer because I've bottled everything inside from along time now that I finally brust! The thing is I don't easily trigered by problems. I actually learn more and more stuff listen to others point of views. I've learned that people make mistakes not the end of the world as long if you think twice about stuff. But I find it that I can relate to others and not feel so alone. I couldn't talk to my friends about this like being depressed because hardly some don't understand it. Maybe think I'm crazy... just a little bit. I do respect all members here with the open thoughts alot! I really can't give any good advice because most of you have been in tougher situations than to me. I've been in unbearable situations to face and I dunno how I do it or how everyone else does it? But the main thing is in the end everyone is going to be ok!

[SeptemberMorn]

I really don't understand why you are running this poll. Seems to me that you are asking to be told to leave because of your age. If Doc John knows how old you are and hasn't said anything to you, why bring it up?

Some have suggested that there be a teen forum. Doc John is considering it as he said he would. Maybe I'm way off base here, but there seems to be a hidden agenda, although you may not be aware of it.

[LMo]

I think there should be an age restriction, yes. Rather, a maturity restriction, but that is harder to quantify. I don't mean to hurt your feelings Miss A (and I'm not singling you out, either, because there have been many other teens here throughout the years I've been here), but it is actually a little uncomfortable to have a young person read some of the topics here.

Part of it is that I think it's inappropriate to expose a 14 year old to some of these very adult, complex situations, but..

.. The other part is that many people here are uncomfortable posting their situations knowing that a young teen would be reading them.

So, what I'm saying is that as much as a teenager can say "I don't mind"; that's only 1/2 of the equation. The adults might mind, and I think that's pretty important given the contingent.

If there were a teen forum (restricting the teens from the "adult" forums), then I know that many adults here would be happy to go there and talk to the teens about their problems.

Again, no offense meant to anyone personally -- but this is how I see it.

[Kathyanita]

very well put and thoroughly clear thinking. . .I agree with you. . .

[Gemstone]

Of what use would an age restriction be? This is the internet!! Half of the people could be under 16 for all we know. Even if they are not members they can still read the posts. We are all human beings. If we all learn to treat everyone here with respect we will be fine. There is just so much subtle nastiness here. We are here to help each other no matter what age.

[LMo]

Sorry - not meaning to be nasty - I don't know any other way to express what I feel.

[radio_flyer]

I never really thought about an "age restriction" here. I rather think your a breath of fresh air... I have no problem with younger teens hanging around here...

[Gemstone]

I wasn't directing that at anyone inparticular. I am just not sure why this was ever brought up. It is just not feasable. If there was an age restriction people would lie about their age. I just think if someone comes here for help we shouldn't invalidate them by saying they are too young.

[LMo]

it wouldn't be invalidating them.... it would be redirecting them to a specific forum.

Hey folks,

Opinions were asked for and are being given. Please respect the opinions of others that were asked for.

Thank you good community of Groholian PsychCentralers!!

[kimmydawn]

if there's an age restriction, what will WE do?

peace ppls

[LMo]

lol KD!

"Only people with the physical age of 35-36 may post on this board"

Would I be stuck replying to my own threads, then?

[kimmydawn]

[jmo531]

This is why I suggested a teen forum. I would never want to exclude someone from receiving support here because after all this is what PC is for. As LMo said lots of adults with lots of adult situations that may make either party uncomfortable with either reading it or sharing it.

[Miss_A]

Agreed...

[jmo531]

(((((((((((((((Miss A))))))))))))))

Maybe I need to clarify a bit hun. I have a 14 year old daughter. There are things that I discuss and see on this board that I would not want her to read at her age. I understand that teens, like you are going througha very rough time and need some place to turn to. Like I said, I would never turn my back on anyone in need, never. I think you have been a great part of this community and definitly let us know what the younger kids are going through these days and that is a positive. I just worry that maybe, being as you are depressed and going through so much that reading certain posts here may hinder your recovery. Then again, I could be wrong. I am only thinking of you sweety. We all care about you here. Please dont feel abandoned. OK?

Much love,


Jen

[Miss_A]

Don't worry I was being silly. I'm fine with it and I kind of get what you mean like if a post something to do with relationships like getting married and the topic title said not sure? I couldn't post an answer because I'm too young to know about that stuff because I won't get married at the age that I am. So how would I know what to reply to someone unless its one big hug. I feel like the youngest here and the smallest fish in a big sea to put it kind of lost trying to find another fish to swim with around the sea. I don't feel like there is a lot of teens around such a mature forum for problems. It doesn't make my worse reading the triggering posts actually makes me think even more and learn.

[jmo531]

((((((((((((((((Miss A))))))))))))))))

A small fish swimming around in a big sea? LMAO. Thats cute. I am sure that is how it must feel to you. I know that you wont be able to relate to each and every situation here. I know that I cant either, but the fact that you would want to show your support through a hug shows me that we have one BIG (small) caring fish around here. LOL.

I am glad that you can open your mind up enough to understand what we are saying. I dont think I could have done that at 14. That to me does show maturity.

Maybe you can teach us "old birds" a thing or two....LOL

[Miss_A]

Old birds? You mean Prime birds!
I dunno where I get my maturity from? Maybe from people who are a bit older and wiser then me.
A little bit embrassed about the small fish in the big sea thing :O
I've recently been on different forums and most of then have age restrictions to use them, but I'm glad that this one doesn't have it here because even though age goes maturity is another thing.
Any way teen forum shoulds great!!!

[(JD)]

IMO it doesn't matter what a person's physical age is, but their mental age. Some "adults" act/react quite childish while other young ppl act quite mature.

The site is for those who are suffering mental unwellness.. and as the tone or... feel... of the forums change, so must the members.

A teen forum has been requested and chatted about quite extensively and positions on all sides are well-supported! This is why DocJohn "gets the big bucks" because he gets to make the decisions.

Personally, I agree that immature young ppl do create a tone -or issues- and concerns to other members. But to restrict them from the site, or block them from certain forums, I don't see how that helps them.

I read recently that the average teenager only has 3 adults in their life to which they can turn to for real assistance. Having this site, and the wealth of knowledge and wisdom of it's members is really a plus.

There needs to be some... changes? ... but as to what they could be I haven't a clue.

[Roy21]

I think a teen forum would be great aslong as people from the main forum could still post and give advise. I see it as giving the younger generation (which i could still be considered part of being only 20 years old) a place for other young people to discuss problems and provide support to eachother and also recieve advice from the older generation of this forum. I find when i was around 15 - 16 years old i felt i couldnt talk to my friends about problems because i was scared they would just laugh at me.

I know i would have benefited greatly from a online forum with other young people who i could share things with and also seeing that other people from my generation struggle with mental health and personal issues because in school everyone (including me) used to just joke around and act like they were all fine. I even find myself now being almost 21 still struggling to deal with things from my youth because i bottled everything up inside for fear of judgement from my peers. There is so much pressure on young people with school, expectations from parents, maintaining social relationships and trying to find some kind of direction in life that they can feel unable to cope. Add to this a young person dealing with anxiety, depression, attention defecit disorder, etc, and the things can be overwhelming.

A youth forum is definatly a great idea and I support it 100%.

Roy.

[wisewoman]

Hi Miss A. I can't put an age on here. If there were computers when I was 11 I would have been on them looking for comfort. At 11, I was defensive and defiant and wouldn't let people in that easily but I was aware enough to know what was happening and how much pain I was in. I was 11, others are other ages. I don't want to trigger anyone, but all of the abuse got worse at that age, as did the total disreguard for my humanity. Age is a very relative thing. I have a wise co-worker who is only 29. Wow, she is mature and has worked with me for 3 years.