I have been sick for *days.* I'm not running a fever any more, but I have a killer headache that won't go away. I can't get any rest, though, because it's only three days away from the Fourth of July, and I live in a typical American trailer park. Even with all the windows sealed tight, there is no place I can go where it's quiet.

This is going to be judgmental, but I have to vent it out somehow, or I'll just go cuckoo. I'm losing any mind I may have ever had.

I might, just might, MAYBE be able to tolerate the constant bang-boom-blast of the fireworks my neighbors are incessantly setting off, if I thought they were really doing it for patriotic reasons and want to honor the nation's independence. But naw, they're just using the upcoming Fourth of July as an excuse to get rowdy and make noise, that's all. Kind of like how some people supposedly celebrate the birth of Christ by getting snot-faced drunk and acting anything but Christlike. Maybe if I felt well, I could put up with it. I've lived here for three years, and it hasn't bothered me before. But right now, I just want to stand out in my yard and scream, "WILL YOU UNCIVILIZED ANIMALS KNOCK IT OFF WITH THE FIREWORKS??? IT'S NOT EVEN THE FOURTH YET, MORONS!"

I need to get out of here and go someplace where I can have peace and quiet. But I don't know where to go or how I'd get there.

[purple_fins]

oh dear, I sure can understand you not feeling well and the noise upsetting you.
darn it.

could you maybe go to a motel and get some peace for a day or two?

thinking of you and hoping you feel better real soon

fins

[NuckingFutz]

1. Earplugs. 2. Go visit some folks in the hospital and sit and talk with them. If you get a migraine, you will be in the right place. 3. Movie theater. See a nice quite, dark movie. 4. Small, dark quiet movie. 5. Excedrine migraine medicine. 6. Sensory deprivation tank. Hope one of these works.

[sanityseeker]

I can so relate to the hypersensitivity to noise. Add a migrain to the mix and escape is the only safe option. Someone just might get hurt otherwise. It is Canada Day here today but our celebrations are super mild compared to what you guys do in the States. Fireworks are illegal other then the big ones set off at the park by the town firefighters so no danger of hearing them go off randomly in the neighbourhood.

I hope you are able to escape love. Great ideas Nuc.

Thanks for the support, and for not ripping into me for being judgmental. Usually I don't look down on my neighbors. Hey, I live here too. But when I'm feeling that bad, I just have to find a safe way to say something mean, or I'll end up going off like a firecracker myself.

I'm just a fraction of a smidgen better. Ibuprofen isn't completely helping, but it isn't completely useless either. I'm kind of trapped here--I can't drive, and hubby isn't off work until 11:30 PM. Good ideas, NF, and I'll use them for future reference, put a plan in place for the next time I feel like this. I wonder if a warm bath would be helpful, but I'm almost afraid to get into the tub while I'm alone in the house feeling this bad. But the noise has lessened. Thank God, it started raining. I'm still hearing the occasional pop of a firecracker, but it's not constant any more.

We live very near a Native American reservation, where our government's laws regulating fireworks don't apply. What you can't buy at a department store, you can buy from a stand on the reservation. A lot of people go to the reservation and buy those things, take them home and set them off--which is illegal, but they do it anyway.

Nothing wrong with people having a party, but I can't deal with it right now, legal or not. Hubby is going to call and check on me a few times before he comes home. We're both hoping I can hold out until tomorrow morning and go to the doctor's office, as opposed to an ER.

[sanityseeker]

Actually the same is true here with the fireworks being legal on the rez but the law has been pretty strict with folks who set them off anywhere else so it doesn't happen much.

Thank goodness for the rain hey. That always helps to put a damper on the rowdies.

Your husband sounds like a real sweetheart. What a blessing to have some one who understands how difficult it is for you to cope right now.

Have you thought of putting on headphones and listening to some music to help block out the noise and put you into a relaxed place. Not sure if that as among Nuc's suggestions so thought I would add it since it came to mind when you mentioned a hot bath.

Hang in there luv. You will be okay. Take yourself to a quiet place and let everything else fade into the background.

I can so relate to being at risk of blurting out raging venom when in overload so good on you for finding a better way to let off some steam.

Thank you, SS. Still some occasional fireworks, and with the loud boom I just heard, yes, I'd say we're definitely dealing with some people setting off the illegal ones.

The bad news, hubby's job requires that any time off near a holiday, if it hasn't already been scheduled in advance, has to be excused with a doctor's note. I don't know if having to take a spouse to the doctor counts, or if they mean the employee has to be the one going to the doctor. I guess I should find out, although I'm sure his employer would make an allowance if I got so sick it was an emergency.

When he called a few minutes ago, we decided I should wait until he gets home before I try the warm bath. I'm not sure I could handle even soft music right now--although I do find Gordon Lightfoot, Jim Croce, and Susan Boyle pretty soothing--but anything's worth a try. Keeping the lights dim, and maybe I can turn fans on for the hum. It won't totally drown out some of these booms, but it might help.

[Dawnhthewolf]

I feel for you and understand where you are coming from , 2 years ago my apartment burned down leavign my family with nothing but the clothes on our backs at 1:30 in the morning on the 4th due to drunk and stupid kids being rowdy, they shot a firework on the roof and well needless to say the place went up in flames due to the apartment buidlings having been built before firewalls were required in building complexes. Anyway when i hear fireworks now well the neighbors settign them off like you said i get a bit nerve wracked and my neighbors have been settign them off for about 2 weeks now so i can hardly wait for them to finish their last pack of fireworks. I also am currently feelign under the weather due to newly found allergies since i quit smoking last year Thanksgiving.
Anyway i am gettign off the subject, i just wanted to let you know i feel for you and know how hard and annoying it can be while people decided to be free spirited and wild just for the pure fun of it. You will make it through i have faith that you are a strong person, turn on some music , or TV , put in some ear plugs and try to relax and get better

[sanityseeker]

I love all three of those singers you named. I go to Youtube for a dose of Gordon and Jim on a regular basis. I have to be really careful about the music I listen to. So much triggers bad memories or stir up to much emotion for me but those guys take me to good times in my life without touching on any bad times.

I write policy for a living, among other things. Sick leave policy varies from company to company and the question of extending the benefit to include sick family members is controvercial. I have had the debate with many clients. I suggest that if they don't allow a liberal interpretation to include family that employees will lie. It is always interesting because the women get it. The men, not so much. The women know that if their child is sick and no alternative care can be found on short notice they will phone in sick to stay home with their child. If they have to claim to be sick themselves to get the benefit they will do that so the employer might just as well allow sick days to include sick family members. Some of my clients prefer to provide additional days specifically to be claimed when a family member is sick and requires their care or needs to be taken to an appointment. Our Canadian labour laws are funny on this subject. There is nothing in the labour code requiring an employer to grant employees paid sick days (though it is the norm and all employees give it) but there is a legal requirement for employers to grant employees a minimum of 5 paid days per year of what they call 'family responsibiliity leave'.

It would be a good idea for you and your husband to check his employer's policy to both avoid misusing it and ensure he uses benefits entitled to him.

I love old classic movies so when the neighbours party in the summer and I am having a hard time coping with noise I will turn the volumn up and keep the tv tuned to Turner Classic Movies. Mostly I just need it to be commercial free so PBS runs a close second if the movies don't match my preferences.

Just keep remembering that it will pass. That you can talk your way through it when it gets tense. Focus on your breathing and release the stress with every exhale. It will pass.

I remember a few weeks back when my anxiety was really accute. I was working in the garden when a really loud truck suddenly zoomed by. It brought me to my knees with sudden uncontrollable crying. It took me a good 20 minutes to calm down. I was so wasted from it all that I couldn't return to my gardening. I had to go in a lay down for a while. It happened a few days after when an ambulance suddenly turned on its siren while racing down the street to the highway where there must have been an accident.

Yesterday I was in the garden and that same noisy truck flew down the street again. I only noticed it after it had long passed because it didn't bring me to my knees like it had weeks before. My anxiety is not as accute so my response was not as dramatic.

Certain sounds do bother me much more then normal people. I was out with a friend last night and a couple of times a noise would cause me to cringe. I asked my friend of it bothered her at all and she hadn't even noticed. It worried me thinking oh dear, my anxiety is rising again but then I thought, lets not make too much of this. So I am more sensitive to sounds. That's all that it means. I took a couple of minutes to close my eyes and focus on my breathing and breath long and deep for a couple of minutes just to restore some balance.

I think at the end of the day the thing that keeps the anxiety from getting out of hand is to be attentive to it and then being liberal with the antidote to level us as best as we can. Even if that is all we focus on for a time is staying calm and feeding calmness that is okay. We are honouring ourselves with acceptance and self love. Its good self care. Do what helps without judgement and without fear. Just take good care.

[Christina86]

People tend to make the holidays a heckuva lot longer than they actually are!

Maybe they were celebrating Canada Day today while they're at it...

Sorry about the headache and the noise, it can really suck having to deal with that on top of already being sick!

[sanityseeker]

Originally Posted by Christina86

Maybe they were celebrating Canada Day today while they're at it...

hahaha... I was thinking the same thing. You still have 3 more days till the real holiday. Not good. Lets hope it rains the whole time or they run out of beer and fireworks. lol.

My headache is still pounding so I suppose I should take a break from looking at the computer screen. Still its been a good distraction from the rapid thinking that is throwing me off balance today. It is good to come here and focus on posting to keep the other stuff at bay.

Nice to spend some time with you. Are you feeling any better? When is your husband due home?

Hubby's home now. I asked about the policy, and yes, it does allow for taking a sick family member to the doctor. As long as the doctor verifies it, we're good. I might not need to go, though. I could be better by morning. We'll see.

The music isn't playing now. Since hubby's home, he's unwinding by watching TV. But I did try good old Gordon, Jim, and Susan. They helped me a lot. Gordon Lightfoot always does. I played him first, and almost from the very first note, I could feel my whole body go limp with relaxation. I wish I'd thought of it sooner.

I just love that man. We very fortunately got to see him in concert about a year ago, and it was one of the happiest nights of my life.

I haven't decided yet about the warm bath. It's almost 1:00 AM here. But I'm sipping hot cocoa, in a dark room, finding funny things to look at on the internet. I'm not out of the woods yet, but I think I'm seeing some light through the trees.

Migraines are miserable. Sometimes I do get them as I'm getting over a flu bug. But then, throw PMS into the mix, and have it hit at the same time as the migraine--and I get like .

When I'm well, I actually enjoy a good fireworks display. Professional, that is. Amateurs making noise are still a minor annoyance, even on a good day, but at least it wouldn't drive me just plum batty if I felt all right. We plan to go this year to the celebration they have on that reservation I already mentioned, just like we did last year. I hope I'm well by then, so I can have fun.

[sanityseeker]

I am 56 years old so Gordon was in his prime when I was in highschool and beyond. We used to go to his concert every year. One of our friends played guitar and sang all of his song. In the summer we would go to the falls and he would sing around the fire. Great memories. He is definately a Canadian icon. Because of Canada Day CBC (our public national television network) is doing a series on Canadian icons and they included Gordon in the list. You might be able to see in on the CBC website.

I love good fireworks shows too. Something mesmorizing about the bursts of colour. I don't like firecrakers one little bit. Send me through the roof in fact even on a good day.

I agree migraines are the worst. Just can't do anything when they hit. Can't even walk straight. Like I am drunk or something. Mixed with PMS is deadly. I remember but those days are gone for me now.

Well, I am glad your hubby is home and things are improving for you. Keep doing what works and maybe with some sleep you will feel well enough in the morning to avoid the doctor.

I am off to try to sleep now. I still feel the migraine pressing but its eased up quite a bit so maybe I can sleep. Maybe it will be gone when I wake up. Hope so.

Wishing you well. Goodnight Love. Sweet dreams.

Wishing you the best, LovebirdsFlying.

[sanityseeker]

How are you today lovebirdsflying? Wishing you well.

Hi, doing a little better. The old computer died completely and we had to get a new one. It came with a new keyboard I haven't gotten used to yet so I'm typing like an orangutan. Fortunately, I had done a recent backup of all our personal files. Big headache getting all the favorite sites back in place though. I miss being able to just click and go somewhere.

But hubby seems to like this computer better than the old one anyway.

[sanityseeker]

Happy 4th of July. Hope you are feeling better so that you can have a great day. Enjoy the fireworks tonight.

And just how does an orangutan type? lol.

[(JD)]

Orangutans type? Who knew?

I also hope you are feeling better.

I'm having some issues with migraines lately as well ... but what isn't fireworks in the area, are thunderstorms.

No where to run to ... no where to hide.

It will be over soon.

[Rhiannonsmoon]

I so FEEL for you Lovebirds! I live in a small beach cottage and I'm a retired disability pensioner...but there isn't anyone over 30 anywhere around us...and the noise is atrocious...loud music, screaming yelling...all that stuff...drives me batty...but I sit and breathe deeply...and when I go to bed it's earplugs even though I'm allergic to latex rubber I'd rather have this inflamed throat ear and blocked off nose than put up with the racket...

Hope it's all settled now...

Rhian