Suspicious Man.

Ok, this man has done this 4 times. I don't understand why you or your husband just doesn't question him WHY DO YOU NEED TO WASH YOUR HANDS HERE? You could run your imagination wild here. It is really easy ASK and if you do not like the answer SAY NO.

He could have a problem with a well or something else, or he could be a homeless man, who knows at this point because you have not asked the question, WHY.
Open Eyes

This is scary, I would be to afraid to confront him in fear of being attacked you don't know if this guy is a psycho, I would call the police lynn

First I want to say again I appreciate everyone's concern / suggestions and validate them. Open Eyes - I didn't know this would get so many supportive replies, so you may have missed my mentioning how the 4 times happened. When it happened the 1st time, I thought he was a worker at a house and passed it off as a man who needed to eat and rinse his hands....so I didn't mention it to my H - I saw him through the window. When H was outside, this is the 1st time he new this guy came and he thought he was out exercising ...it was hot and needed some water...he didn't tell me because he thought it was the 1st time. My H is friendly to people and he figured no harm done if he uses it and that's why he let him do it one other time.

I found out about the 2nd time after I told my husband about the 4th time with my daughter. I also understand Rose's post and concern. So if this happens in the future with my husband outside, he will stop him and ask in his own nice way, as to why, rather than be mean. I'll do the same if I see him through the window by chance. Kathy M. - what you said makes sense. The police won't get here to catch him at the house since it takes him 2 mins. We (H and myself) need to at least get an idea if he does have a house around here, so the police can deal with it in the event he doesn't listen after we tell him not to. Now my H agrees this is odd now that we both realize how many times he's been here - neither one of us knew he came before.

Tinkerbell - yes I called the police yesterday and filed a report. They can't do anything since I don't have his name or address. My husband can honestly sell an ice cube to an Eskimo and smile when he hates a person, so he'll be fine talking to him - he a very smooth talker. I will let you all know if anything new happens.

Hi Rose

I hear what you're saying, but the police can only do so much and usually only AFTER a crime has been committed. They don't have the resources to keep a watch on your home 24/7 and, let's face it, they don't care as much about you or your belongings as you do.

I'm not out for awards or to prove anything either, and I don't place myself or my family at unnecessary risk. If the man is innocent, there would be no reason for him to become defensive. If so, it could easily be laughed off. If he's guilty, and something does happen, you'd be able to give the police a complete description and valid information to help catch him.

Lynn, I'm glad the police are aware of this. I'd probably mention that to him as well, especially if he becomes defensive - i.e., "BTW, the police have been wondering why you're hanging around here too.....and they've offered you free access to their drinking fountain. Want me to call them for you?"

Telling him directly and clearly can be done with kindness and a smile on your face and in your voice. In other words, it need not be confrontational, just matter of fact and nothing personal.

Lynn

Just read your thread.....ugh.....hate when stressful things like this come into our life.....wish all the wierdness would just pass us by....but it doesn't seem to the more strange things that happen, it's bound to land on us some time.

This guy is just too strange in his actions that's for sure.....but I'm like you, it takes me seeing a pattern before I know I need to take action. I don't react immediately, need to see a pattern, but pick up on patterns quickly also that wave red flags. You are the same way......very aware of what surrounds you.

I am guessing that he doesn't live in the neighborhood......why he's picking on your house for water......the million dollar question at this point. I know in the US that pediofiles have to register so that people in the neighborhood will know to look out & be ware if anything strange does happen. Those files are publicly available.......wondering if Canada has a similar requirement that you might at least scan to see if his face shows up.

Usually when someone is up to something & they are seen so many times, they tend to back off & realize that place isn't where they want to be........but it you do see him again, I would definitely do as your husband & confront him in a very subtle way to get as much information out of him in a friendly way to see if the information even sounds logical. Mind you, if he's covering things up, you won't get an honest answer even in a friendly conversation.

I remember the morning I was sitting next to my mother's hospital bed & I got a phone call.....voice sounded just like the carabiean accented home care person but was claiming to be a social worker wanting to talk to my mom. Held the phone up to my mom's ear & listened at the same time. At the end of the call, I asked for her name & phone number......name was some phony name & the phone number definitely wasn't a valid number because I called it after she hung up.

If he does offer you information on himself....don't just automatically believe what he's telling.....go & verify it so you can either validate that what he's saying is true, or you can take that additional information to the police.

I know your daughters have been taught well how to handle themselves in bad situations, but better not to take chances in the first place....glad you have her come in if she sees him again.

Will be interested in finding out what the future holds in this. Hope it all turns out to be nothing, but gut feeling says, there's more to this because things like this just aren't normal or right, or even an acceptable social action on his part.......know you will keep us informed.

Stay safe & all your family also

It could be a homeless man, that happened to my parents. A homeless man actually went right into my parent's home into the kitchen looking for food. My mom discovered him gave him some money and asked him to leave and not just come in her house again. This man was living in some woods near their home.

I can see now that it took you time to realize he was doing this more than once. I wasn't suggesting to be mean or anything but to be direct in asking why he seems to need to use YOUR hose.

When anyone strange comes on my property I always ask right away, "may I help you?" so that person has to answer. I am not snotty or anything but people CAN think they have a right to drive up and walk about my horse farm and they don't have that right.

I agree that it is strange and you have the right to know WHY some stranger is entering your domaine.

Open Eyes

That's a good thought Open Eyes but don't think that's the case. This is a well off neighborhood and doesn't have any inner city people around. I used to live in another house before my kids were born and it was close to the downtown where homeless people would be - anyways one day a man who was a glue sniffer was looking in my window. The houses are all lined close like a regular suburb, so its not like he's stranded without water. I'm really hoping he'll pass by on the weekend and we can finally ask him / let him know not to come on the property....hopefully that will be the end of it.

Hi KathyM, thank you for your note. You are correct that the police can only do so much, but I do disagree with your statement about resources and not caring about me and / or my belongings.

We live in different cities, so perhaps we are commenting based on our own RL experience(s) Our force has a 4-minute response time and never takes anything lightly if we need to call.

It's the part about "if he's guilty and something does happen" ... I'd rather address it long before it ever came to that.

The bottom line is I truly hope it's nothing, and the (suspicious) man just doesnt know any better!

I spoke to my neighbor across the street and explained what's going on - he's out more doing yard work and retired. His house faces the side of mine, where the hose is. He thought its odd for sure and I asked him to let us know if he sees him.

As I mentioned earlier I made a report over the phone to the police, but unfortunately they don't have any other info to do anything at this point. Hopefully we can clear this up and then notice where he goes after he passes by here. We'll be very nice about it and we don't want this to turn ugly. I appreciate everyone's concern and understand why members are worried.

Ok Lynn........you left us in suspense here....lol.......

Did the guy ever come around again? I take it not because you haven't continued with the thread. Maybe he figured that too many of you had noticed him at your home & decided that he couldn't really do what he wanted around your home.

Hope all is safe & calm again.

Thanks for asking eskielover - no he hasn't come back yet. Since some recent landscaping we have a joint faucet which has 2 hose connections - one for the soaker hose and the other one for hand or sprinkler. There's valves you have to turn, to get one or the other going - so either he's finds this too inconvenient or just stopped coming idk. We also make sure we turn the water off now, so he would have to turn it on and figure out the attachment thingy's lol. Before the hose was regular and sometimes we wouldn't turn off the water at the faucet - making it too easy to use. Hopefully he won't ever come back.