I am losing it.

I ran out of money this month, there was just too much stuff to pay for. On top of that I lost my damned purse with like 390.00 in it. I am praying to hell that it turns up. Now I don't have the rent money I was supposed to pay on the 1st of last month.

I am freaking out now. I applied to modest needs, and I am ok for next month but if I can't come up with 650.00 by the 1st then I have 15 days to be out of my apartment. I never, ever do this. I have NEVER spent rent money ever. I have spent bill money but not rent money. I am going to try to negotiate with my landlord today. Does anyone know of any other places to apply for help like modest needs that are canadian too?

Oh god, I don't know what I will do if I lose this place. I will have no place to live and three cats I will have to give away. Everytime I think about it I want to throw up. Plus, I have guests coming for the weekend and I can barely handle myself. On top of this, I have to have a bunch of decorations done for a dance by tomorrow, and I am not nearly ready. I didn't even get supplies until yesterday.

On top of all of this I am definetly on a downswing(bipolar) and its pretty bad. bad enough that i slept almost 29 hours the last couple of days because I just can't take it.

Next month I have a 90 % chance of getting a REALLY good job that pays almost 16.00 an hour, so I will be fine. Plus I have a month of disability. What am I going to do for now?

I don't know if they will let it go, because my rent has been late since february because of being sick. I seriously don't know what to do. I'm terrified and sick to my stomach.

I know there is not anything you guys can do about it but I just need to have support right now and I just needed to dump that all out.

I'll be using this thread as my oh my god im losing it thread for the next couple of days. YOu don't have to read if you don't want to but I just need to vent.

I HATE INSTABILITY

[Evangelista]

(((Rainbowzz)))

Thoughts and Prayers..hoping that you endure this horrible situation

EV

[findebsoon]

Be patient, things may be queered out now but stay focused and look at the feeling and own it and try to accept what is in your control.

findebsoon

thanks guys. Keep the comments coming. I think my kitties and you guys are the only thing keeping me sane.

Oh dear, really sorry about this. Have you spoken to the landlord yet? Hope he (or she) can accept a compromise....

Don't you remember where you might have lost your purse? Might be worth contacting these places (if shops etc.) Can your friends/family maybe chip in for this time if you explain the situation?

Hope it turns out okay for you. Be strong.

I have tried everywhere. I never should have had that much money on me. The problem is we were out for drinks on my birthday when I realized I didn't have it on my arm. Which means I probably set it down on the bar. Ive done this once before and lost 300.00 you think I would learn my lesson. I am so angry at myself.

Maybe it will turn up though.

It is no use beating yourself up about it now, so please take it easy on yourself. I presume you contacted the bar in question (staff/cleaners)? Or your friends, who might have noticed something.

sorry, just trying to suggest options. Also do talk to the landlord and if worse comes to the worst, plead with anyone who could chip in (friends/family?).

you are right. I have done all of this. The problem is my ID was in my back pocket and not in my purse, so anyone that finds the purse is not going to have any way of knowing whose it is.

I am stressing, but there HAS to be a way out of this. There just has to.

I ate some pizza. Im going to see the landlord in aminute. Im hoping they will let me pay next months and then make payments against the rest.

What a wild ride right after my birthday and everything.
Frig.

*watery smile*

[Sabrina]

I am so sorry that things are so rough for you right now. I do hope the way out finds its way to you soon!

ok update. Talked to the landlord. She says that I need to make a list of the payments I can make, and that I need to let her know asap. She is going to see what she can do and talk to the owners. The great thing is I will be back to work next month which will help.

still stressed to the max though

Oh that's good! At least there is hope. Hang in there...

thank you everyone for listening.

the thing is, when I was 16 I left home. I had to, I couldn't be in the same vicinity as my dad, it was just too much. I came to the city I live in and was basically homeless/couchsurfing for the first year and some. It was a horrible experience. I stayed in womens shelters, and watched horrible things happen - stuff that no 16 year old girl should see.. girls getting ready to go work the streets, pregnant women on drugs...etc..

And now that i have built something for myself however small, the thought of losing it is so, so scary. And I KNOW i partially do this to myself. I am terrible with money. No one ever sat me down and taught me to budget. I need to learn budgeting so that when I get out of this mess I won't automatically be back into this mess.

You're right. Maybe you should have a list of rules or something like a top 3 or top 5. And stick it somewhere prominent and/or highlight (on the door to your house or whatnot) so you can't miss it.

For example:
1. never carry more than xxx money on me at any time
2. etc...

[Lexicon78]

(((((Rainbowzz)))))

Sending you good thoughts and praying that you will have some good luck!

thanks lex. I need it.

Hi there. Any news from the owners yet so as to work something out?

[EJ711]

Rainbow,

Sorry you're having a tough time of it. I am financially stretched myself this month.

Where was the last time you remember having your purse?

Hugs,

EJ

[EJ711]

Rainbow,

Have you asked at the bar?

EJ

[EJ711]

Hi Rainbow,

If people who found your purse are honest, they would still return it to say the bartender.

Please forgive yourself, as it will help lower your stress right now.

Hugs,

EJ

[EJ711]

Rainbow,

I'm so glad the landlord is communicating with you.

Take about 10 deep breaths.

Hugs,

EJ

[EJ711]

Hi Rainbow,

You can make up envelopes:

1 - Rent
2 - Food
3 - Utilities
4 - Clothing

Put money in the envelopes as it comes in. That way you won't have money that you think you can spend, when really it needs to go elsewhere.

You've done a remarkable job of getting on your feet. Do you want to share about your new job?

Hugs,

EJ