being judged.

anyone else have had people talk to you or approach you and think your one way but the min you either open your mouth or talk in depth they realize you arent?

............like me.

happens everytime someone talks to me. not trying to boast in anyway (because it doesnt benefit me anyway) but i think my looks are what make people approach me. i mean not clothes but my appearance.......

......it either takes either me opening my mouth or talking in depth for people to get this specific expression washed over there face every.single.time just about. .... .. . . they are welcoming and then they have this blank face and while i talk they start to look at me up and down and some people they start squinting their eyes and forrowing their brows.....

and then they take off in min. all genders all ages....

im 22 so a few times people closer to my age will ask if im retarded or something equivalent.

A lotmof people have the judgemental habit. The best thing is to find people who fight that habit, because they are the ones who will give you the real frienship you need.

yes true

i thank you for that

All my life people have hated me on sight. When they get to know me they find I'm okay, but they know I prefer to be alone. People are too stressful to deal with.

Yes, everyone thinks I'm the dreaded "W" word. I could F'ing care less.

Please excuse my language. I'm very angry tonight. I tried to defend rape victims in another forum and I was bullied out of there by a nasty man.

:/ im sorry to hear about the incident. another forum as in a completely diff site?

so you mean W as in ?....does it rhyme with ore? idk i just didnt know if you didnt want me to say it. trying to give some respect here..

yes i agree people are stressful to deal with. very. to the point where i only leave my house 2-3 times a week. they are....EVERYWHERE :/

The "W" word is weird.

A completely different site. The guy obviously hates women.

...:/ I AM SO SORRY...i thought COMPLETELY WRONG.

Don't sweat it. I'm not.

I dont mean to sound rude, but those people arent worth anyone's time. There are better people out there I am sure that you are great, and that anyone with some smarts can understand you and accept u

I appreciate that. Thank you. I'm not sure what it is. I know I don't smell. I don't look out of the ordinary. I don't know what it is.

I've gotten to the age now where I'm more ignored than anything else. This happened mostly in my younger years. I do prefer being ignored.

i wish i knew what people are thinking when they walk away.

i can speculate though....

newtus, what they think isn't important. What's important is what you think of yourself. That is all that matters.

i think im a freak bcause i think others think that

People have considered me a freak for 50 years. It's definitely hurt me but more often than not I've worn it as a badge of honor.

At work people used to talk about gangs and I'd joke that I'm my own gang and I am. I give all the orders. No one tells me what to do. I'm a freak. I'm weird. So what?

At least I'm not a clone! I don't want to be like everybody else.

Don't let a label define who you are. Be newtus. Be one of a kind. You know who you are and that's all that matters.

im glad im different i just...idk it still hurts. ya know...bullying...

Oh yeah, couldn't get a seat on the school bus, bullied by the neighborhood kids at home and in school, picked last for everything, no one wanted to partner up with me for classroom stuff. Called incredible names. Been there, done that.

Cried my eyes out. Chewed the s**t out of my knuckles on one hand. Used to get terrible stomachaches because I dreaded going to school.

The BS fades as you get older or if you change your core group of friends/peers. Older people do not tend to judge someone the same way they did when they were young. They wise up with age.

There are still bumps in the road and they are jarring, but you do get past them.

My defense is a good supply of stinging one-liners.

yes hopefully - for me anyway.

I don't know if you're a guy or a gal but I'll leave you with this before I hit the rack - when all else fails and I've been as diplomatic as I can be and it still hasn't worked - I whip out the b***h because that's what bullying made me.

Not a day goes by that I don't mourn the woman I might have been if I'd been treated with a little kindness by my mother and those neighbor kids.

I imagine that there are things you mourn too. You're still young enough to make a lot of good memories for yourself if you can. Just something to think about.

Talk to you later.

I grew up with the most judgmental, pretentious, jealous people ... no matter what I did, it wasnt good enough. I constantly felt depressed, angry and like a failure. I never was praised simply for who I was. In my heart and soul. And that is just the core members of my family and extended family.

I carried that feeling of worthlessness into my adulthood and it affected me greatly in a very hurtful, negative way.

I also became extremely adept at reading people...their expressions and body language because generally as an adult, people wont say to your face what they are thinking. (They will say it as soon as you turn your back or are gone).

It took me a very long time.,over 40 years to replace those ingrained "tapes" of beating myself up and hating myself with positive messages to myself.

In order to feel free...to accept myself just as I am. Regardless of what other people think.

MOREOVER I have distanced myself completely from the worst offenders and actually feel.sorry for them because they didnt learn to behave that way on their own.

I will never understand the concept of putting others down to feel better. Or kicking someone when they are down. Or feeling glee or joy at others failires. It is not in my wheelhouse. Never has been.

The best thing for me with people like this is to stay away from them, distance myself or simply limit interaction. Whether it be within "family", socially or at work. I just dont know how to play THAT game.

I would rather be alone than around a bunch of jerks. And the jerks I do have to be around, ugh. I limot my time with them. They have to live with themselves and look in the mirror. I just try as hard as I can to continue to be myself - the authentic me - mistakes, imperfections, human-ness. They can go pick on someone else. When I dont give them fuel, they move on.

And if someone calls me.out on something ro my face... "I dont feel very well. Sorry." works wonders. It really throws people off because it immediately turns things around on them. Owning your own feelings and accepting them. Not hiding or trying to fake it. It is awesome because it forces them to stop and pay attention to themselves. Turns the focus. Esp with rude people, bullies and nasty looks.

You are beautiful and wonderful and have much to offer... just as you are

(I hope this helps a teeny bit)

I'm not sure I understand what you mean. You are physically attractive but your topics of conversation are too difficult for others to understand. Is that it?

I find people frequently talk to me like I am stupid. They mistake my quiet attention to what they are saying as my inability to add to the conversation. Or of course I could just look stupid.

Usually I am sitting there thinking "do I correct that mistake the person just made or keep quiet?" and "how can I disagree without enraging this person" and "how can I agree without spending the next 20 years of my life having to hear about every Poison concert he ever went to" or "why can't I just knock that woman down for saying that filthy thing to me? She's just assaulted me with her evil mind"

Oh, God. Every job I've had people have made judgements about me. The people with more experience/tenure always think that they're right and that they command unconditional respect and they're better than everyone else and they never listen to anything you have to say.

I worked for USAF for few yrs and had a supervisor who would personally attack me, make petty criticisms and I couldn't take it. He would say "I've never had a relationship like the one I have with you", "You need someone to hold your hand", "You don't joke around", "You seem cautious", etc. He asked me how old I was and said, "37" then he said, "I can't see that". Unbelievable. I quit cause I didn't need that, filed bankruptcy and split!

What has always blown me away is when somebody thinks that because I'm white I'm a racist.