[Littlefish]

I see myself as a victim, cuz of past life and horrible childhood........
I m keeping seeking love everywhere, father love, mother love, romantic love, it is like a disease following me, cuz i demanding too much...and always with a dark mood.

This makes me so down, and lack motivation to move on my life now.....
I need some advices or suggestions to balance at least a bit, i need a least a bit strength to take care of my daily life and my health...thanx

[Rhapsody]

IMHO....

YOU need to HEAL you from the inside out to be able to let go of this irrationally constant seeking of LoVe.... to be able to love in a healthy way again.

LoVe,
Rhapsody - ((( )))

[hillbunnyb]

littlefish, hi, sorry you are feeling so alone. Rhapsody is onto the heart of the matter, it's about what's inside you, how you think about how you feel, that is where you can do something to help shift you out of thie uncomfortable needy place.

This might sound nuts to you, but, giving love is the way to get it. The hard truth is we have to start with loving ourselves.
We have to root out all the bummer self talk that has become a habit in our heads. Individually pick through our thought process and change out the broken records of negativity.
Start telling yourself what a good person, strong person, surviving person, lovable person, you are.

Try giving your love away, free of charge, to strangers even, like at the market, if somebody can't find, or can't reach, or whatever comes up that you could lend a hand around.
Smile at strangers. We tend to get back what we put out.

Come here and tell us how it's going. I think we've each been where you are, in one way or another. Sorta goes with having been abused...... or being nuts, or whatever it is that has hardened up your life.

Do you have a therapist? Councelor? Somebody you can talk with in person about your struggles?

We're pulling for you. Healing is a great adventure.

[Lexicon78]

I guess the best advice I can give is that you have to find the love from within yourself and have it for yourself first.

I was like you, looking everywhere else to find the kind of love I had always wanted. I always came up shorthanded and always wanting more or being very unsatisfied with the love I did get. It took me a long time, but I am now beginning to love myself. It's the first time I have ever felt happy and realize I do not need someone else to make me happy or to feel loved.