Really dark thoughts

I do not know why, or what it is about but I woke this A.M in a very bad place emotionally. I do not even know what I want or need from you. I am just trying to not act on the thoughts and keep busy. I do not even have much to say to anyone because I do not want this stain to get on you. Maybe if I try to have some fun on here I can move past this I do not know

Just post if you need anything. I have been there. I wish I new something funny to occupy your time. Oh, but wait, I do know a funny website

http://www.careerbuilder.com/monk-e-mail/

If you would like to send a monk-e-mail....It is a talking email and you can even pick and dress the monkey you want to deliver your message! Hope this helps

Hum so did I, it happens often. Still trying to find ways to deal with it.

Pas, sounds like you have dealt with this depression before...knowing to distract is a good thing... any idea what brought this episode on?? TC!

Thanks Danialla ,Sarah and Sky, I went to dust. I do not know what this is about or why. It really is not like me to think and feel like this over ? I do not even know what. I wish my T would email me back. I am bordering on not safe and keeping as busy as I can. My house will be spring clean by the end of the night. I am off and on doing wash and dusting. I cannot seem to put my finger on this Sky. It is NOT like me. I found all day today I just acted nice to the people I work with and deal with in stores. It was like I was acting at being me

Pas De Deux, I'm not surprised in a way, given your recent nightmare, that you'd be feeling out of sorts. I think what you experienced was very, very unsettling, and your reaction is quite normal. Sorry to hear your T hasn't returned your email; is it possible to call him, or to call his office and say that you need to speak with him urgently?
I've tried to find some funny websites, but when I googled funny websites, the blurbs indicated a lot of adult content, which didn't strike me as funny - just tacky.
I have this website in my favourites:
http://www.worth1000.com/cache/conte...play=photoshop

It's a website where people enter competitions manipulating images with graphics software. I particularly like the film parodies and have posted a link to a page showing films with animal stars. (hard to explain - you kind of have to see it)
I hope you enjoy it. .

((Heartspace))) Again thank you. I will try to check the site out asap maybe at work. I am thinking of eating soon. I have been munching off and on while cleaning. I cannot do another day like today. I will end up in the psych hospital.
On T, I well, to be honest I don't want to call him now because I am upset he didnt email me. It is stupid I know.

God I wish I had a miracle answer but all I can say is I`m here .I hear you & am sending you hugs

Thanks Shear I just hope I do not do anything dumb

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PasDeDeux said:
It was like I was acting at being me

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I know that feeling soooo well.

Pass, please call your t now. If you have a pdoc, call him/her if you can't get through to your t.

I hope you feel better very quickly.

Jan

Thanks Jan and Drunksunflower, I did not call T . I may not see T again he never emailed me back and I just feel like screw it. Thank you to all who spent time with me last night because I was close to ending it for good.