[tinyrabbit]

Having recently discovered that what I do has a name, maladaptive daydreaming disorder, I did a search and found a number of old threads on this - so I wondered if anyone who has it is still around?

If so, how about we have a thread on it?

I've been maladaptive daydreaming since I was young, and it's got more and more complex over the years. I told my T a tiny bit about it recently and he didn't think I was a freak, but I haven't gone into more detail yet.

Some more info about the disorder here: Home - Are You Daydreaming Your Life Away?

I'd love to talk to others, if you're out there.

[Perna]

Good article: Can Maladaptive Daydreaming Be Treated?

I had a zillion years of therapy and that fixed the underlying causes, the trauma and anxiety.

[tinyrabbit]

I've always done it as a way to escape from real life, so fixing things in real life is kind of the only way to go. I'm happy with my life in the present, but the past is hurting me and my daydreaming is very much centred on imagining a different past.

Therapy actually seems to be helping, because I think about therapy instead of daydreaming. I sometimes have fantasies about therapy, e.g. doing something in the room that I wouldn't do in real life, but it's the real me, in my real therapy room. I sometimes send my T to an imaginary supervisor in my head, but it's my real T, talking about our real sessions.

I think it's a step forward for me to fantasise about real people - me and my T - and not change us in my head.

[Perna]

Yes, I use to have "group" meetings with therapists and clients (each therapist was paired with a favorite client, guess who my therapist's was :-) and/or would play my "favorite" songs and explain why they were meaningful to me, etc.

Since the year 2000 i listen to music and day dream that i am singing the song in everyone at a high school concert . . . i still do this.

I also day dream when i'm in bed that i am with a woman who i don't know all that well. We're intimate and we talk, etc.

Also while i watch tv i day dream that i am the world's best at whatever i am watching. For example if i am watching Obama on the news, then i might daydream that i am the greatest political leader that ever lived.

So really i day dream while listening to music, while in bed and while watching TV.

I've heard of this before, but I forgot about it, because, I think I've been too busy doing it; I am pretty sure I'm a chronic maladaptive daydreamer. I really appreciate this post. Thank you

[tinyrabbit]

Thank you for replying! I am amazed at having realised it's not just me. I always thought I was just very strange, that nobody else did this.

[-jimi-]

I'm not sure when it becomes maladaptive. I mean, I'm usually somewhere else in my mind, either I am analyzing the current situation, remembering things and going through them, or daydream especially about the future. The people not doing this... what are they thinking about??

[Perna]

I wondered that too, jimi. . . But I don't daydream as much anymore, I'm thinking about what I'm writing now instead of what I "should" write or what I think you want to hear or what I would like to write, etc. I'm "doing" instead of thinking. I think, "What am I going to have for dinner" and get up and start making it (I was going to barbecue chicken on the grill, parboiling it first but it's a rainy day but I still have to cook the chicken today so I'll just bake it in the oven after par boiling it but it's the corn on the cob that excites me; I want to try making it in the crock pot! I have 4 ears, want to do 2 unshucked and 2 shucked and see how/if they work; I have a zillion people coming over for Mother's Day in a couple weeks and the crock pot can hold the most corn on the cob at once so if I can get it to work. . .)

There's thinking/fantasizing about things versus doing them; I'm excited about doing things now to see how/if they work. I can't taste the imagined corn on the cob?

[-jimi-]

I don't get how you do without thinking. You must have thought it somehow, even if you're not aware of it.

I think maybe that is one way my mind is different from others, I don't think "more", I'm just more aware of what I'm thinking about.

Right now I'm writing this and also listening in to the TV when something interesting is said, also waiting for a friend to say something on messenger, a little annoyed he didn't want to hear about my recent adventure (wondering how to get through to him or if it cannot be done ever again...), also I notice the cat is sound asleep and it looks really comfortable. And I have some vague thoughts about what to do tomorrow.

So no immediate daydreams but a lot of other stuff, my mind is like a train station with a bunch of tracks and I wonder why I should just use one when I can use several?

If I just have one thing to focus on I get this odd bored dreamy feeling and I lose focus. I think I have to be distracted to be able to focus at the same time. Or my brain will be inactive and bored.

[soxcatch]

Interesting... this is the first I've heard of it but it sounds like something I used to do a lot as a kid. I don't really do it so much anymore as an adult unless I get a significant amount of time to myself like a long drive or something like that, then I'll slip into a little fantasy world.

Posting to subscribe. I'd like to learn more about this. Never heard of it before, but it makes sense.

[tinyrabbit]

Is it okay to post a link to a research survey I found? It's nothing to do with me, just something I found. About to fill it in. Seemed worth sharing...

https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/daydreaming

Thanks for the link to that Maladaptive page. I am looking into this. I definitely daydream....usually about what my life would be like if I had made better choices...or what it would be like living their life (while looking at someone who seems happier than I) and in some cases I wonder if I didn't go searching for that daydream life and screw up my own in the process. I must learn more about this!

[sprik]

i day dream about being in love with a great guy, having a job where im a F B I , saving the world, skinny, beautiful, happy. Its a great dream

[l8blmr]

I just learned of this myself and I searched the forums and found this thread. What's brought it to my attention is having things that I want to change and not being able to focus long enough to accomplish much. I've compared my story to others on forums devoted to MD:

I Suffer From Maladaptive Daydreaming | Support Group with Personal Stories, Forums and Chat

Wild Minds Network - Where wild minds come to rest

And now looking back I can see how much this influenced my life. All the time spent imagining that others like me for various reasons. Ruminating over and over about past experiences with myself handling it like a competent adult. It's like an addiction where a trigger will send you to your compulsive distraction to avoid experiencing emotional pain that's become blown out of proportion in your mind.

I think if I learn one more new thing about myself my head will explode.

[lostinbooks]

I'm a little speechless. I didn't know this was such a thing. I have this. I spend every waking moment in a fantasy world.

I guess I didn't think it abnormal.

[tinyrabbit]

I'm reading a book called The Panopticon by Jenni Fagan about a girl in care. It's really good. Anyway the main character does exactly what I do - invent an alternative childhood and family - and calls it The Birthday Game.

[Schizofred]

Im pretty sure I have this. My day dreams are much better than my actual life. Feels ore like im paralyzed by fear though. What kind of treatments are there?

[l8blmr]

Treatments that work for other addiction may also be useful with MD. I know that shame is often an issue with addiction (e.g. abused as child, believe I'm worthless, can't let others see how awful I am, need to distract myself from thinking about it so it won't show). This book helped me with that: Amazon.com: Letting Go of Shame: Understanding How Shame Affects Your Life (9780894866357): Ronald Potter-Efron, Patricia Potter-Efron: Books

[wadingthruemotions]

Originally Posted by SpiritOfAStorm

Thanks for the link to that Maladaptive page. I am looking into this. I definitely daydream....usually about what my life would be like if I had made better choices...or what it would be like living their life (while looking at someone who seems happier than I) and in some cases I wonder if I didn't go searching for that daydream life and screw up my own in the process. I must learn more about this!

I agree with what you are saying here. I do this all the time. I daydream to distract myself from work, boredom, etc. But they kind of take over at times, like that would be the perfect ideal place if it ever existed, or what I would be doing if certain things hadn't happened, etc.

I didn't know this is a real thing and could be a problem. hmmm

I, too, do it a lot, largely trying to create a world that I'll never have. It doesn't interfere with my work or most of my functioning so I'm not going to worry about it. Gotta be happy somewhere. I actually posted a thread on the BPD forum about this not that long ago when it seemed to be getting excessive.

[redbandit]

I have done this off and on since I was little. To escape my boring, mundane life, I imagined my dream house, friends, etc. I usually only do it now when I am really depressed. I just recently discovered this is a disorder, or whatver u want to call it. I saw some video on youtube about it.

[tinyrabbit]

For me it's really a symptom and I don't feel I need to treat it directly. It will go away as I get my issues sorted. I'm doing it a lot less since I started T.

[Gus1234U]

i don't believe my "daydreams" are "maladaptive" at all~! when i was so terribly suicidal they helped me be somewhere painless and possible. when i imagine myself happy, i actually am happier~! when i imagine myself having good experiences, i actually learn from them!

there is a very well respected sports training technique where the player simply "imagines" a perfect performance, over and over again, and her /his muscles actually LEARN to perform better~~! that is how i see my daydreaming, as self-improvement. i practice better ways to perceive others, to behave towards them, to feel about myself, and LO!! i improve~!

one must remember that to doctors all functions are potentially sicknesses, and dis-ease must be eradicated before it spreads. nothing heals by itself, the power of the mind is only good for imagining you are in pain when you're actually a drug seeker (NOT~!)

phooey on whoever said that "daydreaming" or imagination are illnesses~!
Gus