A long life...

On Monday, November 20, 2006 at 2:00am, my dear aunty took her last breath then "flew away home". She did not go easily, she fought it tooth and nail. In death as in life, she was a "stubborn old bird". How I admire her for her strength and longevity. She was 93 years old.

About 2 months ago, I was visiting aunty. During this time, she was beginning to prepare for her demise and her brain was working overtime thinking of what wrongs she had done in her life and feeling down that she didn't think she could right them at this stage of the game. I tried to soothe her, to let her know that this was a normal progression and that as we live, we can only do what we think is right at the time, only hindsight is 20/20. Unfortunately, I was unable to calm her.

One of the things that bothered her greatly was that, as she put it, "I could never say those 3 words to anybody". I told her that it was ok. I understood that some folks have difficulty saying "I love you" and that I always knew she loved me, she didn't have to say it, she showed her love in her actions. From that day on though, as much as she chastised herself and claimed she just couldn't bring herself to say those words during her lifetime, from then on, whenever I saw her, she did say those 3 little words to me...."I love you"...................................................
I guess it goes to show you that you never stop learning or changing no matter how old, no matter how stuck in your ways you've become....change happens. I was so proud of her for overcoming what she perceived to be a problem during this stage of her life. And it made my heart sing to hear those words from her.

One of my fears was that aunty would die alone. She lived her life alone, and I didn't want her to die alone. She didn't deserve that. My fear did not come to pass as both my daughter Erin and myself were with her when she passed. Holding her hands, trying to calm her as she was quite uncomfortable and agitated, whispering to her to go with her family who longed to see her again.

Good bye dear aunty, your troubles are over. Watch over me and guide me for this I pray. I LOVE YOU!!!!!

Indeed... a long life. To say I'm sorry for your loss seems so inadequate... but you've touched my heart.

jean.......i am so sorry to hear of the loss of your dear auntie.....but your post contains an important lesson for us all.....thank you for posting and may God guide you through this difficult loss.....

{{{{{September}}}}} Thank you for your post....Make no mistake, your thoughts are much appreciated

Hugsssssssss
Jean

Thank you so much Julia for your compassion, it means the world to me!

Hugssssssss
Jean

Thank you for sharing your gifts with us, Auntie and the lessons learned. Carry her always.

Thank you WW....I will always carry her in my heart and soul.

Hugssssssss
Jean