Hiding Information from people

Dear All,

For the past few years, I used not to provide information to anyone. I

always try to hide information and ideas from people. I feel that

keeping these information and ideas to myself keep me superior over

others and keep me confident. I try hard to get rid of that habbit but

I am not able to.

I hope people with similar problem communicate with me and I hope if

someone has a solution to it to share it with me.

Thank you in advance.

Hi zizo, do you think that if you shared that information with people that might make you feel vulnerable or a bit insecure?? Maybe if you have a think about the advantages of opening up to people and focus on those a bit more. You must have given them some thought to be posting on here, right??
And that confidence you want to be holding onto (and confidence is a good thing!) might just benefit from other people appreciating your information, learning more about you, and valuing you, do you think? Maybe not everyone will, but there will be people who do, and with that confidence....more self esteem??
And you've probably felt a bit of isolation (just a bit??) from others when you're feeling superior over them, maybe? You know it can be really good to feel like you're on the same level with someone and that they are on the same level with you.
And in sharing information with others, that information is often going to be a lot more meaningful, you know.
Anyway, maybe you could have a think about certain bits of information that you wouldn't usually share and pick a few bits that you wouldn't feel too uncomfortable in sharing. And maybe choose just one or two people you feel comfortable with to start off. People who are going to be on a similar wavelength to you maybe?
Or perhaps add to other people's ideas when they come up with them, that way you're not going out there "giving it everything".
But do you think that you maybe need to work a little on "connections" with others to help you with this? And for that you don't have to let out lots of things, even ask them questions about themselves and if you feel you've got similar thoughts, opinions etc you might feel more comfortable in opening up to them.
Although if it helps more you could try throwing out some less intense information/ideas to people you don't really know if that would make you feel "safer"?? e.g. someone waiting at the same bus stop, someone in a queue at a shop.
But can I just ask if anything particular happened a few years ago to stop you being so open in communicating ideas??
Alison

I don't give people a lot of information at all in my life, because with my experience, nobody really seems to care about my issues, nor want to truly listen long enough to understand me. I became afraid to open up anymore. I've cried out for help as loudly as I could, yet everyone shut me out and did not help. I am not saying people did not try at times....but every time I did need , desperately needed longer-term care, I was always tossed out on my own before I was ready or without alternative solutions to deal with things before blindly jumping into the next phase of my life. Money was always also a limiting factor as well that set up road blocks. Did anyone jump in to help? Not really.... not for true help that could have made a difference. Nobody cared about me that deeply enough. So, I learned to not talk about myself. What's the point?

I don't view this as me thinking I am better or above anyone else. It became a way to shelter my heart from the ignoring, dismissing people in my life. I really needed to be heard, yet nobody I truly felt safe with heard me. I gave up and have tried to go thru life with a smile and act as normally as I possibly could because people in general cannot tolerate anything less than what they perceive to be normal. It is a lonely existence trying to live up to the terms of other people. It rejects who I truly am, so I have lived a life feeling invisible, forgotten, unloved.