[liveforfish]

I'm tired of MI stigma. I live with mental illness, my children live with mental illness. I'm sick of hiding it.

I just took a day off work because my son had a psychotic break and spent night in ER. I know everyone at work will ask me what happened, how is he.

I just want to say it out loud, he's locked in the ER awaiting transport to a psych ward! !!!! Without the stigma attached!!!!!!

If he was in the hospital for cancer we'd talk about it. Well MI is a brain disorder, that's all it is! !!! Just a broken brain that needs medical attention. Same as heart failure, diabetes, or any other problem.

I am going to rise above the stigma. No more stigma!!! I'm going to turn this thing around. I'm going to advocate MI. I'm going to turn this around and create a positive out of a negative.

How's your son? Well, let me tell you...

[yumi]

Good for you for taking a stand on the stigma. For God's sake, people treat us like we have leprosy or something and even with leprosy, I can't believe those people in times past were treated so poorly as well. Then, they turn around and not help. Its almost like family /friends come down with their own avoidant personality disorder. They dont want to talk about it, they certainly dont want to deal with it, so we become invisible and over time , our condition worsens because we feel like nobody cares anyway. Its a vicious cycle that can possibly be eased with unconditional love, support and help.its mind-boggling.

I really do hope your son will be OK.

[Hellion]

I hate stigma, but yeah it sucks...some people just don't get that mental illness is a real thing and its very hard to deal with for people who have it. I mean crap people with mental illnesses including myself still want to get out of the house and enjoy ourselves, and such but sometimes it feels even therapists and mental health professionals encourage that you should constantly think about and 'work on' your disorder it is good to try and get help and find improvements but I wish mental health professionals would be more understanding of the fact many of us want to relax and enjoy ourselves and take our minds off it for a while as well and maybe socialize a bit instead of constantly hyper focusing on it.

[Otter63]

I can relate! I'm bipolar and I have learned to live with the stigma over the years. I'm pretty open with my MI, and I usually don't have too bad of a reaction.

My son was recently diagnosed with schizophrenia, and I find I'm in a whole new ball game with this. For one thing, I don't feel free to share what is his business with people. I know that if people hear this label, they will think of him differently. Also, my son doesn't believe he is ill.

My husband has a drinking problem too, so between everything, I feel like we're the Adam's family. It's just hard for me because I like to be open and share with people, and instead I have to be guarded. Hate it!

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[Hellion]

Also kind of to do with my last post...I am supposed to be trying to keep a mood chart of how I feel each day till my next therapy session, so far I am failing at it due to forgetting or not wanting to bother with it when I think of it and then forgetting. and if I have suicidal feelings or not during the day.

But what good will that do, aside from land me in the psych ward on a potentially good day because the therapist decides I am a danger to myself based on the chart....I mean I don't have a problem with it if I need to be safe and am considering suicide...so yeah I guess I get worried about that sort of thing with filling out such a chart as well.

When I get really frustrated with MI stigma I remind myself that some decades ago people with cancer were stigmatized. No one wanted to tell anyone if they were diagnosed with cancer. It frightened people, it was awkward, etc. Only after LOADS of public education society has been given "permission" to have empathy for cancer patients, not to fear them. I believe that MI education needs to keep happening (NAMI is amazing!) and eventually MI won't have the stigma it has. And too, the stigma isn't as harsh as it was 40 years ago.

[Jolisse]

Why do you have tell other people? I never discuss my MI, it's none of their business.

[Hellion]

Originally Posted by Jolisse

Why do you have tell other people? I never discuss my MI, it's none of their business.

Can't speak for the OP, but in my opinion its not the buisiness of any random person I meet on the street or am introduced to...but I do kind of prefer people I have close relationships with or am developing closer relationships to know I have some issues so they aren't shocked when something comes up. Also when getting to know someone better I would want to know if they have a problem with my having mental illness or not if so then I'd stop persuing that as I don't want to have close relationships with people who would dislike me if finding out I had mental problems.

IN some contexts it does make sense for people to know, but in other situations/contexts sometimes its best to keep it on the DL until you are sure its safe to talk about it...unfortunately the stigma does exist so not saying people shouldn't be able to be open but out of safety it might be best to keep quiet about it in some situations.

[radio_flyer]

Originally Posted by liveforfish

I'm tired of MI stigma. I live with mental illness, my children live with mental illness. I'm sick of hiding it.

I just took a day off work because my son had a psychotic break and spent night in ER. I know everyone at work will ask me what happened, how is he.

I just want to say it out loud, he's locked in the ER awaiting transport to a psych ward! !!!! Without the stigma attached!!!!!!

If he was in the hospital for cancer we'd talk about it. Well MI is a brain disorder, that's all it is! !!! Just a broken brain that needs medical attention. Same as heart failure, diabetes, or any other problem.

I am going to rise above the stigma. No more stigma!!! I'm going to turn this thing around. I'm going to advocate MI. I'm going to turn this around and create a positive out of a negative.

How's your son? Well, let me tell you...

Just my opinion... I agree with others that not everyone has to know. And then there are the ones we do talk to about mental health issues...I have to say I applaud you as you plan to "turn it around" and make a positive out of a negative.

In my opinion, people are more likely to be afraid of what they don't know or understand... For instance, back in the late 90's I thought depression meant one was crazy and I didn't want to be crazy. To even go to a "shrink" one had to be totally nuts... Once I understood, which took years, I might add, I no longer think of mental health issues as being crazy..

So in my opinion, when folks have a better understanding of mental illness they may no longer be"afraid" or be "wary" of those with MI issues..
We don't have to be a walking mental health book, but it would be helpful
to be well informed of the MI issues in our lives and our family's lives so that when we do share, we can pass information that helps one to better understand... anyway.......... just my opinion......

[liveforfish]

Originally Posted by Jolisse

Why do you have tell other people? I never discuss my MI, it's none of their business.

I want to be able to talk about my experiences with my son, that's why. I'm hurting and I want to openly say why. When my family member had cancet I could talk about it openly with my friends at work.

[Fuzzybear]

I fully agree with being able to openly discuss MI when we need to. For example, if I am feeling really unstable and need a night off work I would love to be able to be honest with my boss, rather than making something up because MI isn't taken seriously. Ironically, the more people are truthful about MI the less stigma there will eventually be.

[mindyonz]

MI stigma is so pervasive... and is compounded my movie culture... My country is crazy about movies... and the problem is .. movies always show MI person as someone very extreme in behavior, or someone who has lost his mind and roaming on the streets like a lunatic.... Yes.. these are also cases of MI but probably 1 or 2%...

The problem is when they show only these 1 or 2%, the whole society think MI are like that and need to be afraid of... This is crazy....why cant they show some "normal person" leading "normal life" with mental illness and struggling with it akin to showing a person who had physical injury and leading a normal life...

And it's not just the general public as a BPD I've been turned down by therapists who have never met me because I'm too hard a case.

It would be nice to be able to actually explain and have people understand when I'm not doing well rather than having to make a joke of it or cover it up because it's just me being 'cray cray'.

"Don’t let them in, don’t let them see
Be the good girl you always have to be
Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know"

Mantra of my life.

[avlady]

i am schitzophrenic, my son is in the process of being labeled with pycosis, he seems to be happy now that he has a counselor and doctor, and i am proud of him as he doesn't seemed too bothered by a stigma, things are different these days and people are more accepting of it as ive noticed.

[liveforfish]

Thank you all for your opinions. I like reading them.

Yesterday, after a sick day, to deal with my son's being admitted, people say to me, how's your son. I say Ok, because I don't want to bring up all the emotions boiling inside me. Don't want to cry in front of the big boss. My close co-worker, I can trust, I was able to open uo to. The others, well I just said his brain hasva boo-boo, end of discussion.

Today I had to call wirk to let them know I'll miss half my shift. I have to go see my son's md in a hospital over an hour away.

This means more questions when I get to work. Too stressfull!! I may dodge the questions of concern and move on. I may say the truth, let it be out there.

[Hellion]

Originally Posted by mindyonz

MI stigma is so pervasive... and is compounded my movie culture... My country is crazy about movies... and the problem is .. movies always show MI person as someone very extreme in behavior, or someone who has lost his mind and roaming on the streets like a lunatic.... Yes.. these are also cases of MI but probably 1 or 2%...

The problem is when they show only these 1 or 2%, the whole society think MI are like that and need to be afraid of... This is crazy....why cant they show some "normal person" leading "normal life" with mental illness and struggling with it akin to showing a person who had physical injury and leading a normal life...

What exactly is a 'normal' life...also I don't know a movie about someone leading a perfectly normal life but having mental illness might be a little boring, I mean what would the plot be?

Sometimes doctors and medical professionals stigmatize mental illness worse than anyone else does.

[mindyonz]

Originally Posted by Hellion

What exactly is a 'normal' life...also I don't know a movie about someone leading a perfectly normal life but having mental illness might be a little boring, I mean what would the plot be?

At least I feel like why dont they stop showing mentally ill persons as lunatics and sadists whom people need to be afraid of..

[possum220]

In my previous life............. as in a very long time ago....... I had to take 7 months off work due to a very bad brain boo boo. I did eventually get back to work. Yes, some people treated me differently, and others shared their own mental illness stories about a family member. Things that they had kept secret.

We never really know what will happen. Some people are kind and some aren't.

Take Care.

[Hellion]

Originally Posted by mindyonz

At least I feel like why dont they stop showing mentally ill persons as lunatics and sadists whom people need to be afraid of..

I agree with the sadist thing, that does get annoying, as for lunatics not really sure what exactly that is defined as...so not sure if I disagree with one with mental illness being portrayed that way depending on what it means.

[mindyonz]

Originally Posted by Hellion

I agree with the sadist thing, that does get annoying, as for lunatics not really sure what exactly that is defined as...so not sure if I disagree with one with mental illness being portrayed that way depending on what it means.

I dont deny dat lunatics are not there.. but just portraying all MIs lunatics as sickening.. Though they make the movie with a noble intention of showing lunatics as normal people with MIs, it ends up giving a message that all with MIs are lunatics...

Originally Posted by Sister Rags

Sometimes doctors and medical professionals stigmatize mental illness worse than anyone else does.

And other people in positions of authority as well. I think one of the biggest reasons why the stigma exists is because the people in positions of influence or authority set that negative example which society then follows.

In the past months there have been a few cases illustrating this. In different cases there were people stopped at the Canada/USA border and refused entrance due to those border agents somehow getting access to records relating to their health.

In one case, a woman had been hospitalized for clinical depression a year earlier. She was refused entrance and had to miss a cruise because that information was in her records.

In another case, a bipolar patient was not only denied entrance, but also fingerprinted and photographed because her records indicated she had suicidal thoughts months prior.

So long as people in positions of authority are going to treat people with mental illness as though they're criminals just for having a mental illness, than I don't think the rest of society will move past the stigma.

[Hellion]

Originally Posted by mindyonz

I dont deny dat lunatics are not there.. but just portraying all MIs lunatics as sickening.. Though they make the movie with a noble intention of showing lunatics as normal people with MIs, it ends up giving a message that all with MIs are lunatics...

Seems like its just another word for insane, and sanity is relative...Also they could certainly show normal people with mental illnesses, but they shouldn't leave out abnormal people with mental illnesses. If society is sane I am insane, if society is insane I am sane. Just how I feel about it being normal isn't something I strive for.

[liveforfish]

Trebyn, that happened? Makes me mad.

Today my friend at work made a comment about another worker. I corrected the negative words used replacing them with unstable. Then gently told her to watch what she said because my son was in a psych ward getting help. She respected that and changed her tune.