Things i Have No Control Over

This is the internet. This is an online community. We all agree on that, surely?

This site is a mental health forum which offers a venue for support from and to posters who suffer with a various hodgepodge of maladies.....and most of the time it works pretty well for that.

People come and people go. I try to pretty much take the posters at their word and assume that they are here for the same reasons that I'm here. Occasionally, as we all know, a rat might sneak in between the cracks, as in my own home, and nibble around on "my"cheese.......I may call out the cats and the rat "reforms" or leaves of it's own volition or is kicked to the curb......that works well also.

BUT, i don't have any "control" over who really is on that keyboard,in this forum, in another country or state, so sometimes the fear of the unknown takes over and upheaval shows up in lots of different forms. And it is going to work that way til the cows come home.

I, personally, am going to keep on trucking, without any brakes , and give everyone the benefit of a doubt. I've been thinking about this a lot and as much as I hate to "be out of control in my life"......the forums are going to be a "live and let live" home for me.....a few rats may get it but i've got four cats. and even though my dear Amsu is a bit absent-minded (he's 19), he can still swing a pretty good right clawed hook.....(ask Fayedy)

The main statement I'm making is that I cannot control everything that goes on around me( and how tiring it is to try to control all) and unless that rat gets all of my cheese........LIVE AND LET LIVE TO HIM/HER........

I agree!

{{{fayerody}}} I've been thinking the same lately, and as you said:

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fayerody said:
The main statement I'm making is that I cannot control everything that goes on around me( and how tiring it is to try to control all)

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May I add, "some thing are better left alone"...

Post deleted by Fuzzybear

excellent post, we are here to support not hurt, if ya clash with a person, over look them and focus on others who ya don't clash with.

To try and respect is all we can do.

Good post ((((((((Pat))))))))

I try and stay out of the "politics" (that is not the right word but at the risk of being chastized it is the best I can come up with please edit as necessary) of the site and wish that everyone can just respect everyone else. Everyone has their own baggage, both good and bad, and no one is better or worse because of it. Let's please respect each other and hopefully everyone won't have to buy cats. i don't have one and don't want to be overrun.

Maybe this year as a resolution we can all support each other rather than have to worry aobut what is going on behind us. I know I can not control many things in life and hope that ths is not one of the places I need to worry about. I know after the first (and hopefully the last time I may have hurt someones feelings) I too have been thinking about this. It is amazing how one mistake makes you afraid to post anymore.

I know I can be a bit naive but I really do think we can do this. (((((((((((to anyone I may have hurt))))))))))))))) I don't even like cheese. (that really isn't true but was the only thing I could think of to illustrate my point).

Well, I am rambling so please lets take care and let's help each other. That was what the site was designed to do. IMO

Hopefully I did not misinterpret the gist of the post but if I did I still hope this can happen.

thanks, fellow posters...........xoxoxo pat

((((((( HUGS ))))))) ~ ~ ~ ~ ((((((( HUGS )))))))

.... YOU are NEEDED and WELCOMED here by ME

Good Post Pat. And, Oh so true!

We all need to think twice before we hit the continue button as we are responsible for ourselves and no one else.

Linda

thanks Boops!!

something else that i'm going to throw out is the temptation to give advice when advice hasn't been asked for. i've been guilty of it and have worked really hard to curb that within myself.

it hurts a person if they are doing their best at posting and being supportive and someone comes along and tells them to do it "differently, better, my way", etc.

this isn't really a teaching site. it's a support forum.........

and the way that i've found that i learn best is by listening, reading and trying to help someone who has asked for help. i am so grateful for all that has been given to me here........i think the 12th step in the AA/Al-Anon program says that we're at our best when we are helping someone else.

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fayerody said:
it hurts a person if they are doing their best at posting and being supportive and someone comes along and tells them to do it "differently, better, my way", etc.

this isn't really a teaching site. it's a support forum.........

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Quote:
fayerody said:
it hurts a person if they are doing their best at posting and being supportive and someone comes along and tells them to do it "differently, better, my way", etc.

this isn't really a teaching site. it's a support forum.........



Thank you ((((((((Pat))))))))

Hey sweetie. I don't think anyone likes being told what to do, but I know I love suggestions of things to try, sometimes. Sometimes not... But then I can just ignore the posts that the time isn't ripe for...

Just wanted to let you know that you are welcome to give me advice

:-)

thanks, woman....i am pretty up front with you, aren't i?

have ya ever noticed we are our own worst enamy when it comes to asking for advise and then when it doesn't suit us we get pissed about it,we need to remember " don't shoot the messenger"

I agree to much of this, and find in my RL it is helpful to realie this, and not stagnate and ruminate over stuff.
I mean, I'm not saying I can always hold to this, but when I do, I feel less burdened, and allow myself to move forward.
Goood post.

i just truly believe that there are so many other things going on in my life that my spending any time trying to ferret out real or imaginary villians (rats after the cheese) would be insane. i am already INSANE. why compound my troubles????????????

as Doris Day so beautifully said, "whatever will be, will be......the future's not mine to see."