Something very wierd...

Hi Folks-

I hope I'm putting this in the appropriate place. Something very wierd has been happening to me, and I was wondering if anyone else has experienced it or is experiencing it right now.

In the past several weeks I've had three impending depressions and one impending manic phase. But they never came to fruition. It took me about an hour to talk myself down each time and I was okay. It's almost as if I've gained control over the episodes.

Is this possible? Has it happened to anyone else?

I think there are several contributing factors. One is that I'm actively writing again and when I'm writing my whole world just seems to fall in place. Another is my age. I'm finally learning what's important in life and I don't want to waste anymore time. (I'm so tired of the drama!) And I don't think about suicide anymore. I've taken that out of my toolbox for good.

The last factor is that I've cut back on my medication (with the approval of my doc of course.) I still have to take the full dose of my PTSD meds because I'm not in charge when the dark dreams come.

The rest of the time I just feel normal and happy and mostly calm.

I know many people here are off meds after being on them for years. Was it like this for you? Did you just taper down until you felt normal? I don't know that I will ever be completely med free, but just cutting back has made such a difference. I would be very interested to know if this has happened to you.

This hasn't happened to me, but I just wanted to say congratulations to you. It sounds like things are going well for you at the moment, and if you're finding ways to control your issues, that is priceless

Thank you Arthur for your kind reply.

Yes. But a lot of it probably depends on biochemistry. If the biochemistry is raging, it's probably very difficult. But if our system has evened out, I really do believe that we have much more control over our emotions than we give ourselves credit for.

Therapies like REBT and CBT are based on the idea that we can intervene in our distressing emotions and actions by intervening in our beliefs and thoughts. There's a sticky at the top of the Psychotherapy forum listing 10 common cognitive distortions.

http://forums.psychcentral.com/psych...bout-them.html

Entire schools of therapy are based on the idea that if we apply our efforts to counteracting those thinking distortions, we can change our feelings. And I think it goes both ways. We can talk ourselves into and out of episodes. But it takes a lot of mental discipline and we have to catch it early. If I let it go, without trying to stop it, I'll fall into the abyss and it'll take me three to five days to even begin to climb out. But if I catch it right way, I can pull myself right out of it. Maybe it'll take hours, but that's far better than days.

Not everyone believes this sort of thing works. But it does work for me. Sounds like you discovered it for yourself. Congratulations!

Hello, Tea&Sympathy. Congratulations on utilizing what you have learned to maintain your well-being.

Going off my meds eventually affects my ability to function at a higher level. Several psychiatrists have told me they think it is the placebo effect. I understand that to mean I lack resilience.

Thank you SnakeCharmer!

That was illuminating. It's only taken me over forty years to get here! I think I might wrap it all up and label it 'letting go'. Letting go of all the restrictions my illness has placed on my life. Letting go of the negative thinking and the pain.

"By counteracting these thinking distortions, we are able to change our feelings." I had not put it in quite those terms but it makes a great deal of sense. I think I had reached the point where it was either change my thinking or just go ahead and jump off the dam bridge.

I recently celebrated the first anniversary of my husband's death, and the death of a very abusive relationship. I changed from SSI to the VA, had some changes in medication and of course, had to change all of my caretakers.
That is a lot of changes for one year.

I don't put much stock in entire schools of therapy. You can have 46 degrees and read a thousand books about PTSD and BP and anxiety disorder, etc.
But if you've never been there...

I respect your opinion because you have been there and I thank you for your thoughtful reply. And congratulations on finding a way to control this yourself! Tea