I can't believe the hostility & mean postings that came out of a simple post by another PC re: current movies. I see the thread has been stopped. I guess I can see why so many people are dropping out of PC. I think I may have to be one of them, too. I can't stand seeing someone being picked on for an issue that was important to her. Plus there is the selfish fear that I may be the next target if I don't post something PC enough for some of you at PC.--Suzy

[Rhapsody]

((((((( HUGS ))))))) ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ((((((( HUGS )))))))

I am sorry that you are being effected by the hostility that can some times play its self out even here in the forums.... just as it does in real life.

I personally posted the letter as I received it in an email from AFA and did not change a thing. I only wanted to share with the many other sexually abused people here on PC so that they too could let their voice be heard if they wanted to join in the fight to remove smut from the general public eyes.

And YES - while I may have received the email because I am a Christian and I do submit to the AFA Newsletter - I did NOT post it due to religious beliefs, but rather due to my horrific past of being sexually abuse by 4 different men over a 7 year period in my very young and vulnerable life..... and that is how is has a lot to do with MENTAL HEALTH.


LoVe,
Rhapsody -

P.S.
Thanks for your SUPPORT

[Soidhonia]

Suzy I am sorry you feel so unsure about PC. I frankly hope that you stay and change your mind. Maybe you should Pm Doc John about the issues you are having about leaving. Take care Soidhonia

[LMo]

I would be happy to discuss the decisions and the process with members individually via PM.

[Rhapsody]

EDIT: to my post above
I personally HATE these types of movies for the men that abused me use to watch these type of films (plus porn) and two of the men admitted that the sex / rape in these movies influenced their minds.

[SeptemberMorn]

Then maybe you should post in the Sexual Abuse forum... and leave the "religious" content out. I, as a Christian, get triggered by some of your "religious" beliefs, Rhap. And it always seems to show up in your posts one way or the other.

Maybe it's time that you accepted the fact that your sexual abuse has colored most of your thinking. If I'm not mistaken, it's ongoing in different ways.

Pardon me for saying so, but I think it's your present abusers you should be confronting with your issues rather than stir up conflict here on the forums.

If you post in Sexual Abuse and admit you have issues there, you may not be confronted as quickly or as easily. Your post that got locked felt to some of us that you wanted US to do something about your issues and play by YOUR rules. Only YOU can do that. Life is what it is. This world is what it is. YOU need to learn to deal with the problems it causes YOU.

Last year, KD and I tried to keep a thread alive that dealt with the laws surrounding child abuse; Jessica's Law and Megan's Law. However, we didn't shove it in people's face. It was in the Sexual Abuse forum. It didn't look to me that anyone took it seriously. You'd think that those that were sexually abused as children would like to make the laws more stringent and protect other children. It was frustrating for me and maybe KD, too. It just didn't have the argumentative tone to it that I feel most of your posts have.

There's a way to say things, put ideas across to others so that it isn't confrontational, judgemental or cause conflict. Believe me, I know! I've had to learn the same lesson myself!

[froggie2]

I am finding mixed feelings on this. I appreciated the info. I was shocked. I was uncomfortable about using PC for a petition though. Although I agree with it. I think there is a real need for caution with what is being put out there. Like tv, swearing is now common place. In daytime. Sex is shown when children are still watching. Porn is showing up in prime time. What becomes common starts being accepted as normal. We want to live in Safe towns and cities but don't want to stand up and protect them. It is a delemma as to where does it stop? We want freedom of speech, freedom to practise art, but where does responsiblity step in? The other side of the coin that makes me wonder is for someone who grew up watching this stuff as normal now carries on with their "normal" families. In a time when we are looking at a planet littered with garbage and misuse which affects future generations is this not another form "garbage" What exactly do we want for our future? I do applaud you Rhap for standing up for something you believe in.

[Rhapsody]

YES..... September - YOU are right this time and I was just thinking about that as I was driving to pick up my nephew from school, but then it was to late to change where I had placed the thread.... but after thinking it thru it I did realize that it should have went in the sexual abuse section with an explanation as to why I was sharing it.

And YES - I agree with YOU once again here, that my past has effected my thinking (as it does with any one who was sexually abused) - but then on the other hand there are many people out there that were NEVER sexually abused and they still HATE this type of smut..... which btw (and once again) I state that I posted it as to share so that many of US could stand against this sexual ugliness that so many are calling and expression of creativity. I DON’T THINK SO - not!

I am not for sure what you mean by me confronting my present abuser..... for there is NONE.
And I personally do not post thing as to stir up conflict here on PC, but rather I see the conflict coming more from the ones that stir up hostility when they oppose strongly against that of what another may think or feel that is of a different POV......

And I was NOT soliciting any thing, for I do not own AFA, but I do happen to agree with them on this subject, but I do not sign everything that they stand up against.
WHY is my posting a link to sign some thing of good works any different than that of other post that do the same thing, but from a different poster than me?
.... Please think about that for a moment, for I have personally thought some threads posted on here were wrong - but that was my opinion, therefore, I did not say a thing about it to the poster or to the others that agreed.... I happen to honor the right of another to their own thoughts, feelings opinions - POV.

And YES, we ALL here need to deal with the problems that confront us, but then again is that not what PC was created for - to HELP US ALL confront and deal with our issues with the help of others.
.... Plus I feel that the few that find my thoughts on here upsetting or resonating to them - need to deal with their own inner feeling before attacking me or any other member.
.... We ALL need to grow up and past that of wanting every one to think, feel or do as we do.

YOU SAID:
</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Last year, KD and I tried to keep a thread alive that dealt with the laws surrounding child abuse; Jessica's Law and Megan's Law. However, we didn't shove it in people's face.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Please tell me how my post was any different than yours and how I went about shoving it down any one throat.... for all I see is that I shared the INFO and then I left it along. How is that shoving or forcing?

One last thought...... I WILL NOT be made or force to post and think as a few think I should, for I am an individual and I will not be made to think or act like another. We all have our ways, and they are not WRONG just because a few disagree with us.

I have tried my best to be as nice and considerate as possible with my reply here - but I also needed to say, express how I too have been feeling... just as you and one other have done today.


LoVe,
Rhapsody -

I love PC and the people that care and support so many of us here, but as others feel, I too am growing tired of the hostility and nail biting.

((((Rhapsody))) it is impossible for you to post here without being attacked by people who disagree with you. i wasn't the least bit interested in what you posted and i answered "no" to the poll. i didn't e.mail anyone. i have the power to see or not see a movie. i'm not going to legislate what others see or what they buy. but i couldn't care less about where or how you posted it. all of the screaming about it being religious is just that......some people like to hear themselves berate others........finding fault.....

having said that, i think it would be respectful for members here who receive a lot of support for their threads to either stay out of threads, written by people they have a beef with, or post something supportive.

THIS IS A MENTAL HEALTH FORUM. A SUPPORT FORUM. IF, someone here feels so strongly about something as the thread that Rhapsody started (meaning Rhapsody).......give it some space........

i'm sick of seeing her threads ripped.

[Raynaadi]

I just don't post if I disagree or if my first thoughts are ones of hostility.

[seeker1950]

Good for you, Pat....I haven't been here for two months and am relieved to see someone speaking in a balanced and honest way about what is/has been going on here!
Patty

thank you, patty......

[jacq10]

Well said fayerody ....

[(JD)]

I was amazed yet not surprised by the reactions to that thread, however further discussing it borders on an admin issue, or perpetuating the original intent?

I'm sorry to hear how upset it made you, and hope that, in the future, you will be able to distance yourself from such upset. With so many members, especially new ones, it's a learning process regarding how to post and how things will read best, imo. One thing I picked up on in two posts on this thread though, contribute to the idea that ppl tend to think in generalities (as this is something that adds to depression, black and white thinking etc so could be a mental health connection there.) I quote the two:

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
I guess I can see why so many people are dropping out of

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

I don't see "so many people dropping out." I'm wondering if perhaps many of the members with the same dx or ilk are giving negative support regarding some upsets here at PC, to each other, rather than good support, and thus not getting the fresh air that flows through the site.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
((((Rhapsody))) it is impossible for you to post here without being attacked by people who disagree with you.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

I think this might just be a mistatement? Perhaps meaning to say I'm sorry you feel it is impossible? Because, if it truly is impossible, then that is an admin issue, or a therapy issue or both? I'd like to think that any member can get a fair shake and supportive posts from members here, especially as they work to give support and post for easy reading? IDK.

It's a tough crowd, though, with so many, well most? having some type of mental unwellness, and thenin addition so many more learning or relearning social skills as they relate to a website, and all of us working to give support as best we can so the member can receive it.

Keep trying, we can all improve, imo.

Sigh! Is it supposed to be like this? Don't you all hear the alarm signal???!!! People are LEAVING this place! Why?! Because they once came here for support and to give support, but the support turned into something else... bitterness, hard words, words to push others down to the ground... No wonder members are leaving!!! Hello.... it's time to wake up and smell the coffee!
Actually, I'm thinking of leaving too. This isn't the place I once joined... It's sad...

the thread in question to which i am responsible to replying to did show rhaps side and mine, i showed my feelings on this, and i backed them up with facts, i posted a link from the same newspaper that rhap posted that showed that the law was not broken, but what i couldnt post was the link for the bio of the film in question before the post was locked, i will post it now,

http://festival.sundance.org/filmgui...aspx?film=4694

the original post could have been used in a more constructive way, instead it was used for something else, i will not be vilified for making my objection clear, i searched the sundance website for the films in question and based my opinions on that, how many other posters did the same?

this film presented in the proper manner could have been a great tool for dealing with our own sexual abuse problems, instead it was jump on the ban it ban it now bandwagon that certain people dont want others to be able to understand or talk openly about.

[SeptemberMorn]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
I am not for sure what you mean by me confronting my present abuser..... for there is NONE.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

IMHO, this is your first thinking error. I can't and won't discuss it any further because you shared it with me in PM. But you might want to think about the "smut" in your home.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
And I personally do not post thing as to stir up conflict here on PC,

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Maybe you need to stop and think of what the outcome may be with some of your postings. You know that this site is quite deversified in it's membership. Judging from the Sanctuary, there are not that many Christians on here. There ARE people, however, that we know beyond a shadow of a doubt that are either triggered or angered by anything Chrisitian. We have to keep them in mind, not only for our own peace and sanity, but for theirs, too.

Like I've said before, your "Christianity" has been unwelcome from the very beginning. Don't you think it's time you thought about this and added some moderation to your personal beliefs and how/what you post? I am a Christian but hardly anything I post outside of the Sanctuary depicts that. That's what I would mean if I said I don't shove it in people's face.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
but rather I see the conflict coming more from the ones that stir up hostility when they oppose strongly against that of what another may think or feel that is of a different POV......

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Like someone said, we're all mentally ill here, in one way or another... but better yet, it is human nature to respond strongly to something we don't like or feel threatened by. It is a given! It is so especially by those of stong opposing views. That is why we need to watch what we post and HOW we post it so that we achieve what we meant to in the first place and not cause an uproar instead.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
And I was NOT soliciting any thing,

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

I beg to differ! If you weren't soliciting then why did you post the entire email? Why did you include a poll in your post and ask who had written their email? If that isn't soliciting, then I don't know what is.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
I do happen to agree with them on this subject, but I do not sign everything that they stand up against.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

This is your own personal choice.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
WHY is my posting a link to sign some thing of good works any different than that of other post that do the same thing, but from a different poster than me?

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

It's not "a link" as such, but the content of the site.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
I happen to honor the right of another to their own thoughts, feelings opinions - POV.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

So do I and that's why most of the time I make it a point to not read your posts... simply because I KNOW I'm not going to agree, I'm going to disagree wholeheartedly or I'm going to be triggered. "Hollywood" in your title, although it had a trigger icon, made me believe that I would not be triggered.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
And YES, we ALL here need to deal with the problems that confront us, but then again is that not what PC was created for - to HELP US ALL confront and deal with our issues with the help of others.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

You betcha! But like they say "It takes two to tango." The suggestions, help and support need to be, at the very least, given some consideration!

When I get a response such as you've gotten, I force myself to stop, think, consider, ponder, whatever it takes and however long it takes... to see if in fact, there is any validity to what was said to me. Most of the time, I DO find something I could have thought out better, said differently or presented differently. I've also found some character flaws in myself that way. I do what it takes to CHANGE... so that I'm not offensive.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
.... Plus I feel that the few that find my thoughts on here upsetting or resonating to them - need to deal with their own inner feeling before attacking me or any other member.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

I did just that before I responded on your thread that got locked as well as on this one. I don't feel that I attacked you. You wouldn't want to read what I wrote if I HAD attacked you!

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
.... We ALL need to grow up and past that of wanting every one to think, feel or do as we do.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

I certainly hope you didn't have me, personally, in mind with that statement. I know better than to think or even want everyone to think or feel as I do. How boring! "Variety is the spice of life!" Yet, there are ways to express yourself without incurring the wrath of others, starting arguments and discention.

Maybe you don't want to know, but what I found "in your face" about your Hollywood post was all the red and bold font! I found it totally unnecessary. I can read what's in front of me without all that extraneous stuff.

Most people bold, capitalize, etc. when they want to make a point, shout it out... or... feel terribly insecure and don't think they'll be understood or heard otherwise. I know! I've been there! Sometimes I still feel that way. I'm just wondering if you will have the courage to look inside you and see if anything I've said here just maybe... just a tiny, tiny bit, be true of you. If I were you, that's what I would be doing. I've done it more times than I care to think about in the three years that I've been here.

Yes, we are who we are, but it's rather egotistical to think there is no room for improvement in ourselves. We learn... or need to... to our dying day if we hope of being the best that we can be. That's what I want for myself, anyway.

[gardenergirl]

I know I don't post here much, so weighing in on this is probably intrusive. But I just have to say:



I really really really hate reading someone express their opinions in absolutes and from a standpoint of "I'm right, and you're not." And I really really really hate reading someone tell another just how they need to change. I know I'm not at all likely to respond positively to messages coming from those stances. Why would anyone else?

Sorry folks, I was teetering on that last nerve before I logged in anyway, so I should just be quiet and breathe.

Anyone want to join me?

namaste

gg

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((((( gg )))))))))))))))

[Peanuts]

I find that sometimes it is best to just not go see a movie that isn't right for you. I think the sundance film fest is different from Hollywood, they are more independent and typically experiment with both content and film style. If the movie is something that folks enjoy - then you have a surprise 'hit'. If most don't buy a ticket - then you have a bomb. There is no need to ban a movie .. if it is a bomb it will go away naturally.

I happen to think that many of the popular movies are more violence then story line .. and I always know which films those are and I just don't buy a ticket. I'm just thinking of all the slasher movies .. yuk !! As much as I find such movies disgusting, I would not care if others enjoyed. Some folks really enjoy slashers .. and I think they are usually rated R so we are talking adults and older teens.

Defining what is moral is tricky and is different for each individual. Plus, what is moral during one decade is not during a later decade. I do not think that movies cause people to abuse children or blow things up - I think that folks who are inclined towards those behaviors do so because of what happened in their early lives and not by watching movies.

I don't think it is good for young children to be exposed to such movies - there is just no good reason for that kind of exposure to a young person's mind. I imagine such movies are rated accordingly so that everyone knows that the intended audience is adults.

**Quote:
((((Rhapsody))) it is impossible for you to post here without being attacked by people who disagree with you.



I think this might just be a mistatement? Perhaps meaning to say I'm sorry you feel it is impossible? Because, if it truly is impossible, then that is an admin issue, or a therapy issue or both? I'd like to think that any member can get a fair shake and supportive posts from members here, especially as they work to give support and post for easy reading? IDK.

****************************************************************************

please don't assign "mistatements" to my posts. i know clear as all get out what i'm saying. and i meant what i said.

if it was an administrative issue, wouldn't it have been addressed by now? how about it being a member's issue? as in staying out of stuff when someone has a different view than you have. there are posters that i don't read because i know i'll have nothing to offer or say due to a difference in our beliefs. it isn't hard to do......

please don't ever think that i don't know where i'm coming from.

[froggie2]

[(JD)]

namaste Did you know I named my bunny that?