a question about support

What does support mean to you?

What does it feel like?

What does it feel like to be unsupported?

Do you feel you deserve support?

I posted a similar question elsewhere, I would really appreciate replies here though. It's a sticky subject for me as I feel so undeserving As well as too "needy"....I am guessing some or many of you can relate (?)

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Fuzzybear said:

What does support mean to you?

Do you feel you deserve support?


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... It means I know with out a doubt that someone has my back
(and) they will be there to help me up when I fall short in life.

... and YES, I personally feel as though I deserve support - we all do.

Fuzzy, I used to feel the same way as you...undeserving....
When you are in a relationship wherein you are receiving unconditional and consistent support you start to feel ok about it....not sure about what just came out of my fingertips...It's taken me a few years of therapy to learn that I have needs...valid needs...one of them being a need for support...it's taken me a long time to allow myself to reach out for the support....from people...or posters...who are capable of providing it....graciuosly.....

Support to me means that you care about someone...sending hugs or a good word to someone who may be feeling down...that makes me feel good inside to know that I am helping someone else too...I am not very good at expressing myself sometimes but support also means that you are here for someone when they need it!

Support to me is;
someone who listens
someone who doesn't judge
someone who time/day has no meaning
someone who is truthful
someone you can depend on anytime
someone who knows when to cry/laugh with you
someone who does...just because.

I agree with snowflake

My biggest issue with support is feeling I am not worthy of somebody else’s time and attention. AKA, low self esteem and self worth.

My best friend is my biggest supporter—she calls to check on me or to just say hi. She encourages me to get better, listens to me, is honest, tells me things I sometimes don’t want to hear, she is patient, sometimes she just spends time with me…sometimes we just have fun together. The biggest thing she does to support me is share part of her life with me—her time and part of herself—I feel privileged when she shares her feelings.

My friend, who I consider to be my kindred spirit, is always trying to get me to see how much I have overcome and how special I am…We have wonderful conversations about morals, spirituality, life meaning…we may have differing points of views, but we always listen to each other and respect each others words.

My dad—who is actually my step dad—is a support. Although I did not meet him until I was older, he taught me about unconditional love. I am his little angel—no matter what I do, he loves me. We have a special relationship. I am so fortunate to have him in my life—he did not have to love me, but he does anyway.

My boyfriend encourages and supports me in my artistic endeavors. He always finds a piece of good in whatever I create—he points out things that I would miss. This gives me direction in my art.

My T and my pdoc offer great support—they may be paid to do it, but I feel like they are personally invested in me. They give me part of their energy—part of themselves.

And, of course, this group offers me invaluable support. No matter what time of the day I can login here and feel uplifted about myself and my life. No problem is too big or too small—somebody always has a word of advice or encouragement.

When I was young I had no support—nobody protected me or helped me…that is such a lonely feeling.

What a great question—thanks for letting me share. Its good to think about this—it makes me feel grateful for the people I have in my life. I truly am a rich person.

Snowflake said it very well. And I liked the statement about having someone's "back".....that means the world to me. I have IRL friends, even Navajoes 1000 miles from me, who have my back. And I have theirs. There are people here and IRL that I would throw myself in front of danger for.........xoxxo pat

Its a big question, my answer is small...................... I feel supported when i feel safe in the support

What does support mean to you? It means I have an idea or belief that somebody listens to and can understand where I'm coming from and encourages my going forward with it or just sitting peacefully with it.
What does it feel like? Support feels like "maybe my way of thinking isn't so abstract.

What does it feel like to be unsupported? It feel like I'm the 6th finger on a hand. Something's just not right about me.

Do you feel you deserve support? Depends on what I'm being supported on.

Fuzzybear, support to me means having and giving love, tending to connections in one's life, no one someone cares if you are not around and will knock on your door or peer in the window to make sure you are all right.

I have not done the things humans are supposed to do to develop support, and I feel that I am seriously flawed at being able to do those thing.

Not only do I feel undeserving of support, I feel that I should take up as little space on the planet as possible. I used to try to be invisible when I entered a room. I got over it for a while, but since 2003, I have lapsed back into feeling that way.