[blueheadphones]

Hello there. But enough about you. I'm 17. I've been having problems for the past five years. I have a million problems, real and imaginary. Anger management, no friends and social life of any kind, I don't study ever, I'm always kind of sad-ish, sometimes I have sadness or rage attacks. A couple of days ago I realised I can't remember the last time I was really happy. In school I always keep to myself, don't like talking to anybody and am a mixture of awkwardness and aloofness. Yesterday when I fake smiled while talking to a professor he said:"Hey, she's smiling!" It was weird, I'm weird.
I'm kind of having a bad day. My dad is depressed and my mom doesn't respect me much. She says she does but her actions show opposite. We had a little fight because of a broken promise and it seems like she doesn't want to apologize because her ego is threatened. I haven't left my room all day in hopes that she'll call me, but no. I even tried fake crying. Tomorrow I have to visit my psychiatrist and my other doctor for anorexia. I was supposed to gain some weight but I can't eat when I'm sad. My life sucks a little.
I'm so very passive and problematic and dead inside. I really don't know what to do. It seem to me like I'm in an infinite loop of ****. Nothing is being solved.
I cry a lot. Right now my head hurts from crying. All my shrink can do is prescribe some meds, which I don't want to take! I've been on meds before and I can't remember anything from that period of my life because of the side effects. So no. And I've been offered hospitalization for anorexia and other stuff which is awful. I don't believe these are the only ways to solve problems. My question is - has anyone here felt down for years and managed to get a life by themselves, with self help, without any support? Tell me a story idk
Thanks for reading and please excuse my english.

[scaredycat3]

Hi, I understand what you mean by not remembering the last time you were truly happy.
I'm also 17 so I don't have too much life experience but there's been times when I've become better on my own. However, those issues were related to seasonal depression which is fairly normal and it wasn't a big deal to me.

I had what I think was symptoms of mild psychosis about 2 years ago and I went to therapy and I was prescribed medication to prevent further depression.
I was better for a while and I thought I had my life together but now everything is coming back and I've recently started going to a therapist again.

My advice is to get help with your anorexia and maybe see a therapist about your sadness and anger issues.
For me it got worse the longer I waited.

Blue headphones, there is no such thing as getting better by yourself. We need others to give us feedback to help gauge us where we are at in our progress. If you could get better on your own you could of healed yourself a long time ago. And it didnt happen, for you or any of us. It doesnt work that way. We need others in our lives. So i recommend you be honest with your therapist. I recommend you keep a daily journal and write down all your feelings and your thoughts. Then discuss them with your therapist. They might find a pattern that you do not see that you both can work on to get better. I feel for you, i really do. I did not always have the easiest life growing up, trust me. And i had a cousin die from anorexia. She was a nurse and knew better but did not seek professional help to get better. She died five foot eight at around seventy eight pounds. you don't want to be a statistic do you? then do something about it. every day is a gift to work on getting better. i really wish you well. tc

[blueheadphones]

Originally Posted by scaredycat3

Hi, I understand what you mean by not remembering the last time you were truly happy.
I'm also 17 so I don't have too much life experience but there's been times when I've become better on my own. However, those issues were related to seasonal depression which is fairly normal and it wasn't a big deal to me.

I had what I think was symptoms of mild psychosis about 2 years ago and I went to therapy and I was prescribed medication to prevent further depression.
I was better for a while and I thought I had my life together but now everything is coming back and I've recently started going to a therapist again.

My advice is to get help with your anorexia and maybe see a therapist about your sadness and anger issues.
For me it got worse the longer I waited.

We're kind of in a similar situation, especially the 2 years ago part. Thanks for the reply.

[blueheadphones]

Originally Posted by omegalamed

Blue headphones, there is no such thing as getting better by yourself. We need others to give us feedback to help gauge us where we are at in our progress. If you could get better on your own you could of healed yourself a long time ago. And it didnt happen, for you or any of us. It doesnt work that way. We need others in our lives. So i recommend you be honest with your therapist. I recommend you keep a daily journal and write down all your feelings and your thoughts. Then discuss them with your therapist. They might find a pattern that you do not see that you both can work on to get better. I feel for you, i really do. I did not always have the easiest life growing up, trust me. And i had a cousin die from anorexia. She was a nurse and knew better but did not seek professional help to get better. She died five foot eight at around seventy eight pounds. you don't want to be a statistic do you? then do something about it. every day is a gift to work on getting better. i really wish you well. tc

Hey thank for your answer. I always do everything on my own and I got used to it I think. But I will discuss everything with my therapist. And I'm sorry about your cousin, that's awful. I am getting better, just slowly. Sadness makes me lose my apetite. I wish you well too.