Mental Illness as grounds for child custody termination?

I was actually thinking church nursery volunteering too. That's typically only a few hours on a Sunday.

Seesaw

I'm going to see how I am in June, if I'm not more stable I'll wait longer.

Anna, I sincerely apologize for calling you self-centered; I am often blunt to a fault, and I admire and appreciate your civil response to my rudeness. I must ask, however: why is no one speaking for the well-being of the child?

Dec was last hospitalization
No job
No stability

Right now this isn't the area you should be wasting time and effort on. Maintaining birth control, looking for stable living and working on your own mental health should be priority right now. Perhaps a better question right now is what can you do right now today to improve your mental health.

Lefty, I wrote quite at length about the welfare and well-being of the child. Just because she's not ready right now doesn't mean she won't be in the future.

Sorry about that.

No worries.

That's fair, but to me being able to be a mother someday is my motivation to get better mentally, physically and logistically. I've been dreaming about it since I was 5 years old.

Just like with any other goal, it involves steps. This is the one thing I want more than anything in the world, so I look at it as the reward that will come after I get myself stable.

I hope that made sense.

Thank you.

I was concerned about the welfare of my future child as well, because I don't think either situation, me being unstable, or them being in foster care, is good for them.

I just need to know that this is possible someday, because it is my dream. I also understand that you have to work towards a goal and can't just get it overnight.

So you know what you ultimately want, now is the time to create a plan on how to get there.

Of course stability is the key, right? How do you stay stable? I don't know your exact situation, but for many with MI, this involves seeing a therapist and psychiatrist regularly, engaging in therapy, and taking medication as prescribed.

A daily routine is also great for helping to provide stability.

A stable home environment, and a steady source of income as well. Savings are a MUST!

You have educational/career goals as well, so that's a good thing to be working on as well.

But of course, first things first. Do you know about Maslow's Heirarchy of Needs?

Pretty much start working at the bottom and go up. If you think you can achieve anything higher up without having the support of the things below-----you will likely crash and burn, as all of these needs build upon one another and needs at the top require you to have needs below already satisfied (for the most part).

As for the MI history causing the authorities to take away a child? Its not likely unless you are unable to care for the child's needs OR you end up with a jerk for a father who then uses your MI against you-----this is a HUGE reason to choose your partner wisely, one who understands your struggles and isn't going to use it as a reason to take your child away. (I am not trying to scare you, rather I want you to know that in custody cases, MI can be blown out of proportion so that one party has an advantage over the other. Its not right, especially if the MI parent is fully capable, but unfortunately it does indeed happen.)

If you strive to maintain stability, then the chances of your child being taken away are quite small. Its a reasonable fear, but if you plan ahead and prepare as much as you can, then the likelihood of this happening decreases dramatically.

The most important thing to remember is that this all takes time, sometimes a LOT of time! I'm 6+ years from my last MI hospitalization and I'm not stable enough to have a child. My anxiety zaps so much energy from me it isn't even funny, and I have very treatment resistant insomnia which affects just about everything i do. I think that if you take things one step at a time, you will ultimately realize your goal. Its tempting to think too far ahead and to want to skip steps in healing, but it never really works like that unfortunately.

Once again we are in the situation of asking for advice and being unprepared to hear it.

Once again we are in the situation of someone misconstruing constructive criticism for hate instead of an effort to actually be supportive and helpful.

Once again, we are in the situation of where one (or more) think blindly jumping on a bandwagon of agreement with a poster is the only right thing to do.

Once again we are in a position of where a poster wants to hear only validation for their thoughts. One can acknowledge another's thoughts yet still disagree.

And, once again we are in a position where perhaps bringing up the harsh reality of a situation is really the most important thing we can do.

Please, do NOT take these things to be acts of vindictiveness, hate, or trolling when what they really are are acts of kindness and support.

I didn't take offense to anything anyone said here. I may disagree with some points, but that doesn't mean I'm not considering them. The only part I had a problem with was the self centered comment, and that poster apologized for that.

I'm confused as to where you got that I only want to hear validation. I told them I appreciated the feedback.

I think it's funny how I can say something and then have everyone miss the point entirely.

But I got the point:

It's best to wait until I'm more stable, and if I am in a stable place it is unlikely that CPS would solely use my history r against me. The latter being my actual question, the former being something I never disagreed with. Is that clear enough for you ?

Obviously you're free to continue posting in this thread, but it's purpose has been fullfilled.

Anna, it think his comments were less about you and more about the ensuing responses to your OP.

I too think this thread could be closed now.