[InACorner]

All I keep hearing is people who just keep talking about a 40+ chat area. While i have the most deep respect for them i just need to say something then i will shut up. I am turning 20 coming up sept. 17...while this is a big step for me....others see it as eh...not a big deal....i have been through alot in my life....in fact people make the joke that ive already had menapause at age 12....and now im looking to retire Anyway. I have been here awhile and know most of you. I been through all talks of all ages....heck i never grew up with children my own age...but it doesnt matter to any of you what i have experienced in my life...it doesnt matter that i have raised three children...and im not over 30....it doesnt matter that i have been lawyer, a social worker, a mother, a lover, a teacher, a caregiver....what seems to matter to everyone is the number....i love all of you....and i can keep up my end of the conversation as good as anyone....granted...i might act like a child at times...dont we all....i may act silly or goofy....but of 18 years of serious trying to surivive...dont you think ive earned that right to make an occasional inappropriate joke? What you guys dont realize is that 40 is a number....not a character description...my father is 60 and once you meet him ...you wouldnt allow in the age 5 and older group!!! But that doesnt matter to anyone...my advice...and my love and my support doesnt matter to anyone all because im turning 20...and think about it....how many people WOULD use it ...it seems like alot when you all come together to ask for it but what if i was in a really intriguing adult conversation with some over 40 and someone else came in over 40...would you make that person follow you just to keep the conversation for over 40 because its appropriate there? And leave me out or would you continue the conversation and join in...and even if i may act "appropriate" enough for you to accept me i still couldnt join in your conversation...therefore causing me more isolation than any of you intended...however that would always be the story of my life now wouldnt it....im always isolated but its nice to talk to others .....but just remember...what i say may mean nothing to any of you....but it means something to me....and it means something to all the people not 40 years old...think of all your friends who are 38, or even 39, or 30 who have had quite alot of experiences but they cannot have an adult conversation because they dont meet the age requirements....it doesnt matter what i have to say....as long as im 40....i need a fast forward button. Im sorry for the rant...but it needs to be said...i speak for no one but myself and remember i love you all...and wish to continue to support all of you as you have done so wonderfully to me...this is only my feeling.....take it as you may....hopefully no hard feelings.
love,
inny

[Pita]

Hey Inny - you definitely do not need a fast forward button - thankfully you have a lot of space between your age and 40 to have lots of time for better things to happen in your life. Personally, I'm over 40 but I have no problem hanging out with adults under 40, in fact, because I chose a career path and not a "family" type path I have more in common with the under 40 crowd since I do not have kids (3 dogs and 3 cats) and I have never had a husband (long time bf but we still do our own things), and while I bought my first house a few years ago it was not because I wanted it - I needed it for the dogs and cats! A friend told me that he figured the reason I put off having a house so long was because I figured somehow the noose around my neck that is the mortgage finally made me an "adult." As I think about, probably over half of my close friends are under 40. So, don't despair - I am sure most of us old geezers over 40 would not want to exclude you from any chat.

[bebop]

inny hon I have never had an issue with you being in any chat. yes you are very mature. I haven't seen an over 40 room mentioned here in awhile now but I don't read all the forums either.

[InACorner]

thank you both. I appreciate your kind words. In fact it is mentioned in a post here in general, thats why i kinda snapped. I apologize. I had just had a whole day of people making me feel incompetent and when i read it i felt even more incompetent in holding a conversation.

[bebop]

there was a thread I think at the beginning of summer but that is pretty normal here. I hope you are feeling better.

[okiedokie]

Hi Inny,
I don't have an issue with your age! You have great experience on with which to draw. Also, you happen to be my kids' age so you are more helpful to me than ever!

I'm truly sorry you felt hurt by this. I guess "age-ism" is just as hurtful as sexism.
Again, please accept my apologies. I don't know what post you are referring to, but I know I was yucking it up with Septie the other night and we were joking about age, so if that was the post, I'm sure sorry!
Take care,
Okie

[InACorner]

its ok okie.

thank you for your kind words.

and i am feeling much better bebop thank you also for your consideration.

i just want everyone to be able to support each other in a nice considerate way and sometimes i feel everyone gets so wrapped up in society that we forget who we truly are and become something everyone else expects us to see. I have always been something that is not normally portrayed at my age group, never have been and i guess never will be. And it has always been others who judge me on my peers and that has what helped make my life soo difficult. Thats why no one believed me that my step father abused me or my mother verbally and mentally abused me, they thought since i was a teenager i was making things up, that i had done something like stayed out to late to deserve something, when in fact all i did was want to read a book and go to school and work two jobs inbetween. And to this day i still battle with others because no one believes me that i just wanted to be allowed to be quiet and alone ...i would present ideas in school and was laughed at and my teachers would pull me aside and say that i was wise beyond my years and they have not caught on just yet. No one seems to understand that age discrimination is as just as dangerous and invalid as racism...but those are just my thoughts.
thank you again
love,
inny