Originally Posted by Wunderland

P.S.

Keep your awareness high about yourself too. Ruminating about traumatic incidents in recent pasts are so common with mental illness. It's like the past won't let us go somehow. I'm sorting out with my counselor about how to tackle this too, so I apologize if I can't offer sound advice right now. Just a reminder, that's all. Take good care of yourself.

I am guilty of this and need to work on it in therapy. Thank you.

[SheilaKathy]

Yes, I just had a bad experience last week on a mental health site too. I asked to have my account deleted and was told they don't do that there. So I opted for what they call HIBERNATING your account and was instead BANNED temporarily! I mentioned in several spots on the site that I was thinking of leaving due to more and more negativity that I had been experiencing there. The owner of the site came onto my profile and said to just leave, and not say that I was planning to leave, accusing me of "trying to get attention." I guess they don't want anyone else to think of leaving, like I was. I doubt I will go back. I hate that it has been made to look like I did something wrong, but going back there could prove to be upsetting to me, as it was getting more and more upsetting by the day. I did not used to get negativity there, but lately I had, had more than my share of it, and I had just had ENOUGH! There was a clique of friends that had started to make snide comments, not the kinds of things they could get banned for, but the kinds of things that would build up in my mind to be more than just annoying.

So I can TOTALLY relate to what you have said here. In fact, I even wonder if we might be talking about the same website!

Originally Posted by SheilaKathy

Yes, I just had a bad experience last week on a mental health site too. I asked to have my account deleted and was told they don't do that there. So I opted for what they call HIBERNATING your account and was instead BANNED temporarily! I mentioned in several spots on the site that I was thinking of leaving due to more and more negativity that I had been experiencing there. The owner of the site came onto my profile and said to just leave, and not say that I was planning to leave, accusing me of "trying to get attention." I guess they don't want anyone else to think of leaving, like I was. I doubt I will go back. I hate that it has been made to look like I did something wrong, but going back there could prove to be upsetting to me, as it was getting more and more upsetting by the day. I did not used to get negativity there, but lately I had, had more than my share of it, and I had just had ENOUGH! There was a clique of friends that had started to make snide comments, not the kinds of things they could get banned for, but the kinds of things that would build up in my mind to be more than just annoying.

So I can TOTALLY relate to what you have said here. In fact, I even wonder if we might be talking about the same website!

WOW. It does sound similar in that the site I am talking about doesn't allow you to delete your account AND the site owner is quite combative and unreasonable and will ban people she simply does not like or want to tolerate and not because they violated enough times to get officially banned. It could be the same site, though I don't think I am allowed to mention which site I am referring to.

I am so sorry you had such a negative experience there! It sounds like it became too cliquish, negative and unhealthy/unhelpful for you... once it's no longer positive, it can actually harm your mental health, and that is what happened to me.

I would recommend NOT returning there, and just remaining here! This is such a great place I have found, full of amazing support and amazing people.

[SheilaKathy]

My ex-site's owner is a man, so we are probably speaking of a different website. However, he has a wife that also runs the site with him, so we could be speaking of the same site. Really, it does not matter though. We are both HERE now, we don't really want to go back and that is what matters now.

I look forward to getting to know you better, here, Eve, and putting the past firmly behind us.

My mental health is rather shaky at this time, so I sure am glad I found this site. I need all the help I can get in general always and now specifically!

Originally Posted by SheilaKathy

My ex-site's owner is a man, so we are probably speaking of a different website. However, he has a wife that also runs the site with him, so we could be speaking of the same site. Really, it does not matter though. We are both HERE now, we don't really want to go back and that is what matters now.

I look forward to getting to know you better, here, Eve, and putting the past firmly behind us.

My mental health is rather shaky at this time, so I sure am glad I found this site. I need all the help I can get in general always and now specifically!

I am sending you many many BIG virtual hugs right now. I hope you can feel them!!

I totally understand feeling shaky -- I have been there many times myself. I will support you in any way I can...

Yes, let's both put the past & negativity behind us -- that is definitely best. Onwards and forward! I am so glad you are here and look forward to getting to know you, too!

More hugs!!!

[SheilaKathy]

Well, I took a teaspoon of honey just now. My tummy was feeling awful and I had already taken just about everything for it, but this one last thing that I HATE to take, because it has a numbing agent in it and makes my mouth numb as well as my tummy. Now it probably does help the tummy, but I will only take it if all else has failed first.

I think the tummy is one of those body parts that really FEELS our mental health states rather too strongly sometimes. At least mine does!

When I had that panic attack, my tummy was also doing things like feeling nauseated. It was kind of feeling that way a half hour ago too, so I took a Pepsid and then finally some honey. I think it is feeling a little more like it is supposed to now!

Still, I do know, from my teen years and beyond, that when my mind is unsettled, so is my tummy! Dairy products help sometimes, so does honey and then my prescription tummy meds I take every day too, but sometimes that tummy just has a "mind" of its own!

Originally Posted by SheilaKathy

Well, I took a teaspoon of honey just now. My tummy was feeling awful and I had already taken just about everything for it, but this one last thing that I HATE to take, because it has a numbing agent in it and makes my mouth numb as well as my tummy. Now it probably does help the tummy, but I will only take it if all else has failed first.

I think the tummy is one of those body parts that really FEELS our mental health states rather too strongly sometimes. At least mine does!

When I had that panic attack, my tummy was also doing things like feeling nauseated. It was kind of feeling that way a half hour ago too, so I took a Pepsid and then finally some honey. I think it is feeling a little more like it is supposed to now!

Still, I do know, from my teen years and beyond, that when my mind is unsettled, so is my tummy! Dairy products help sometimes, so does honey and then my prescription tummy meds I take every day too, but sometimes that tummy just has a "mind" of its own!

Awww, well at least you know what will help! Hope you feel better soon ((((((Hugs)))))

[SheilaKathy]

Honey has antiseptic properties, in other words, if you have some minor "bug" in your tummy, honey will sometimes settle things. And if it is something else, honey still can settle it for you sometimes too. Whatever it was, the honey solved it, and I did not have to take the other horrible stuff!

So my mind is feeling better too, not worrying about possibly being sick, which was a huge concern. Getting sick in any way for me is dangerous, because of my weakened immune system. I can get secondary infections, because of that.

Originally Posted by SheilaKathy

Honey has antiseptic properties, in other words, if you have some minor "bug" in your tummy, honey will sometimes settle things. And if it is something else, honey still can settle it for you sometimes too. Whatever it was, the honey solved it, and I did not have to take the other horrible stuff!

So my mind is feeling better too, not worrying about possibly being sick, which was a huge concern. Getting sick in any way for me is dangerous, because of my weakened immune system. I can get secondary infections, because of that.

Wow, I did not even know that -- good to know!

Glad the issue is resolved --- phew!

[SheilaKathy]

I think sometimes that old time remedies, in other words, herbs and garlic and stuff like that, can be as helpful as some of the products of modern medicine, OTC or prescription. Our grandmothers knew what they were doing! A lot of these things have come down through the ages, generation to generation.... maybe all the way back to the garden even! Who knows....?

Originally Posted by SheilaKathy

I think sometimes that old time remedies, in other words, herbs and garlic and stuff like that, can be as helpful as some of the products of modern medicine, OTC or prescription. Our grandmothers knew what they were doing! A lot of these things have come down through the ages, generation to generation.... maybe all the way back to the garden even! Who knows....?

Agreed!!! I used to use homeopathic remedies myself for various issues. I may pick that back up again.. you've inspired me!

[natureschild]

Well, I'm about 99% sure I was banned by the same forum as you. Let me tell you, the owner of the site is very power mad. When I tried to discuss a problem with her once, she told me "Because it is MY site.". It was so toxic there that I actually think it set back my mental health for a while. I had a lot of good friends there, and still keep in touch with a few on Facebook. I am glad you got out of there.
Lisa

Originally Posted by natureschild

Well, I'm about 99% sure I was banned by the same forum as you. Let me tell you, the owner of the site is very power mad. When I tried to discuss a problem with her once, she told me "Because it is MY site.". It was so toxic there that I actually think it set back my mental health for a while. I had a lot of good friends there, and still keep in touch with a few on Facebook. I am glad you got out of there.
Lisa

Sounds like the same woman. Yikes. I am glad you keep in touch with those you care about , and I am also glad you left that toxic site!

[Turtle_Rider]

I never been in other MH forum aside PC, but I've been into several forum where they have section for mental health. Mostly are nasty, through so far there are 1 who supportive (but I still left since that is cosmetics forum and I could bleed money if I stay there too much). Sorry for you to feel this way.

I'm glad you find your way here. PC is -so far- the safest and most supportive site that I ever been into.

Anyway, if you still have to check that site regularly, can't you just block that one stalker? I'm sure every forum has that feature.

Originally Posted by Turtle_Rider

I never been in other MH forum aside PC, but I've been into several forum where they have section for mental health. Mostly are nasty, through so far there are 1 who supportive (but I still left since that is cosmetics forum and I could bleed money if I stay there too much). Sorry for you to feel this way.

I'm glad you find your way here. PC is -so far- the safest and most supportive site that I ever been into.

Anyway, if you still have to check that site regularly, can't you just block that one stalker? I'm sure every forum has that feature.

Thanks for your input!

I don't think I'll be checking that site anymore. Someone had a good suggestion to just give my email to friends and be in touch with them off the site, which I am doing.

I could block that one person, but it won't stop her from looking at my profile. She can still access it, even though she would be blocked.

I am guessing that since our friendship ended and I left the site, perhaps she is curious what happened to me. I exited abruptly and without warning. Perhaps she still cares about me, as a friend, and wants to know if I am still posting there. I don't think she has checked my profile in the last week, so it seems to have stopped.

[SheilaKathy]

Originally Posted by golden_eve

Thanks for your input!

I don't think I'll be checking that site anymore. Someone had a good suggestion to just give my email to friends and be in touch with them off the site, which I am doing.

I am leaning in that direction also, to just stay in touch with folks back at that other site by way of Private Messages there and then move on to my own email (gmail) if they are willing.

I do have what is called a "Trauma Diary" there which I think I may continue on with, and I may also post to my profile with occasional updates, but I am totally considering leaving the open Forums there. Just too much criticism and negativity in general there to continue to deal with. It had been becoming unhealthy for me there, too many times I was coming away from there feeling attacked or insulted or whatever, but not good anyway!

So I can relate to your idea here. That is for sure!

Originally Posted by SheilaKathy

I am leaning in that direction also, to just stay in touch with folks back at that other site by way of Private Messages there and then move on to my own email (gmail) if they are willing.

I do have what is called a "Trauma Diary" there which I think I may continue on with, and I may also post to my profile with occasional updates, but I am totally considering leaving the open Forums there. Just too much criticism and negativity in general there to continue to deal with. It had been becoming unhealthy for me there, too many times I was coming away from there feeling attacked or insulted or whatever, but not good anyway!

So I can relate to your idea here. That is for sure!

Good to recognize it's unhealthy for you, and to avoid inviting any more negativity and criticism. ((((Hugs))))

OMG!!!!!!!!!

You've GOT to be kidding me.

I just posted on that forum saying this:

I am fine, peeps. Well, closer to fine, by Indigo Girls. Just saying hello, sending big hugs to everyone and hoping things improve for all those who are suffering.It's been a little while, but I will soon disappear again.

AND received a message from a moderator saying I had quoted someone and the quote had to be removed and edited, etc.

I am beyond done with this forum. WHY I felt I had to post to say ANYTHING is ridiculous.

[SheilaKathy]

Man! That is totally weird and annoying! So sorry. Yes, stay away from that toxic place! I doubt I will ever go back to the one I left either.

I guess my last post didn't make much sense, lol.

That forum is full of so many negative things I don't need or want.

A friend of mine on there had been extremely rude to me in the public forum, out of the blue about a month ago. A moderator (another friend) had backed me up, but then publicly gave an enormous kudos to the offending person for their kindness, almost the very next day.

I got upset and told this moderator friend that I was going to disappear, and I removed her as a friend on Skype and told her I was done with the forum.

She told me she had to edit a post of mine that quoted someone who didn't want to be quoted. That was not the problem.

The problem was this moderator backstabbing me by giving this other friend of mine public kudos when that friend had been mean and when I was upset by it. Perhaps I am waaaayyyy overly sensitive or something, but that forum makes me crazy. Too much drama and politics.

[SheilaKathy]

There are 2 people who are friends with one another on my "other" forum that dislike me. They make snide comments to me about things I say there, and one of their friends does too. No moderators have stepped in, but I got banned for "dysregulation and being in a MANIC" until the 26th of Sept. I have no idea if any of them has been banned, but I do know that one of my supporters and friends got banned also. I can see a trend going on there. And I don't like it. My friend that got banned is the sweetest person. I have never attacked anyone on that forum, but I sure have been attacked. I did not report the attackers, but I should have. One of them put me on "ignore" status, which I think automatically gives me a bunch of negative points, and if you get 100 of those, you get a temporary ban, even if it is that the person who has you on ignore has wronged you, and not vice versa! Sometimes life just isn't fair.

[Shazerac]

Originally Posted by golden_eve

I guess my last post didn't make much sense, lol.

That forum is full of so many negative things I don't need or want.

A friend of mine on there had been extremely rude to me in the public forum, out of the blue about a month ago. A moderator (another friend) had backed me up, but then publicly gave an enormous kudos to the offending person for their kindness, almost the very next day.

I got upset and told this moderator friend that I was going to disappear, and I removed her as a friend on Skype and told her I was done with the forum.

She told me she had to edit a post of mine that quoted someone who didn't want to be quoted. That was not the problem.

The problem was this moderator backstabbing me by giving this other friend of mine public kudos when that friend had been mean and when I was upset by it. Perhaps I am waaaayyyy overly sensitive or something, but that forum makes me crazy. Too much drama and politics.

Can you say rumination? It sounds like a horrible experience, but your talking about it in a safe place. Get it out of your system and ....let it go.

No good is going to come from revisiting that site.....let it goooo....

Originally Posted by SheilaKathy

There are 2 people who are friends with one another on my "other" forum that dislike me. They make snide comments to me about things I say there, and one of their friends does too. No moderators have stepped in, but I got banned for "dysregulation and being in a MANIC" until the 26th of Sept. I have no idea if any of them has been banned, but I do know that one of my supporters and friends got banned also. I can see a trend going on there. And I don't like it. My friend that got banned is the sweetest person. I have never attacked anyone on that forum, but I sure have been attacked. I did not report the attackers, but I should have. One of them put me on "ignore" status, which I think automatically gives me a bunch of negative points, and if you get 100 of those, you get a temporary ban, even if it is that the person who has you on ignore has wronged you, and not vice versa! Sometimes life just isn't fair.

Are you going to leave that forum? You don't deserve snide comments from anyone..... that is not nice. If you stay and get back on, I would report the next incident for sure. (((Hugs))))

Originally Posted by Shazerac

Can you say rumination? It sounds like a horrible experience, but your talking about it in a safe place. Get it out of your system and ....let it go.

No good is going to come from revisiting that site.....let it goooo....

Yes, it's rumination (which I do), although I have been trying to ease out of friendship with two people I am on Skype with from that forum, and this last incident gave me a reason (I've posted about it under the relationship forum here).

I don't want anything more to do with that forum, including any online friendships I formed. I made a mistake by giving my Skype address to people from there (and I can't just change my Skype due to work reasons).

[Anonymous37919]

Well, I recently had my primary account banned on a forum...and here's the cracker! A flipping troll requested that I be banned, or he would not quit spamming the site until they did so. Never did anything wrong. They have no moderators there. No sue-fire way of dealing with spam attacks. Little regulation occurs. Nothing.

Thank yourself lucky; I've had tons of abuse to deal with on the Internet for years now. Years!

It's a haven for menaces.