[CrazyRG]

I hate myself.
I hate everything about me.
I hate the way I look.
I hate the ugly anatomy of my face.
I hate my severely damaged, disgusting looking skin full of acne and scars.
I hate my thinning hair.
I hate my fat clumsy unfit disgusting body.
I hate the ridiculous sound of my voice.
I hate the way I behave which is absolutely ridiculous and weird and humiliating.
I hate my incapability of doing absolutely anything.
Everything I say or do, I regret right afterward because it is so ridiculous and weird and disgusting.
The only hope that remains to my life lies in the hope that I could change and become an entirely different person. That I could fully erase my former self and become a new, different, finally worthful, tenable and acceptable person.
I passionately enjoy imagining how I finally am this new worthful self and confront my disgusting pitiful former self and then smash its ugly face and disgusting body until it is fully destroyed beyond recognition.

I can only keep on living if I become a different person.

[CrazyRG]

But I have no idea HOW to become an entirely different person and erase my current self and am thus even incapable of realizing what is expected to lie in my own hands.

[Artchic528]

It's easier to love yourself than to become an entirely different person.

With that said, loving yourself doesn't come easy, not in the least. I'm not going to sugar coat it. It's tough as hell to love yourself. Mostly because you're fighting yourself the whole damn way.

My advice. Get out of your own way and stop fighting it. How? Seek therapy, read a self help book, or maybe go take an exercise class. I find that Yoga is a great way to soothe the savage beast within.

[Sunflower123]

I agree with Artchic, it's really difficult to change the entire person. It would be far better seeing a therapist to process your feelings. If you're set on that though, you could make a list of everything you want to change, pick the smallest change and come up with solutions for that change. Rinse and repeat so to speak. Good luck. You may find that if you dislike yourself now, that baggage may still be there once you change.

[Frankbtl]

Hi CRG

Wow, that sounds like a lot of "hate"'s and I'm really sorry you feel that way about yourself, it must be really hard for you
And the question first and foremost in my mind is............has anything happened in your life/experience which could have triggered the first/any/all of those "hate"'s??
No obligation to answer at all if there has been........just........you do sound extremely hard on yourself...........and sometimes identifying/addressing/talking about reasons (if possible) for feelings can help........??

Alison

[Fuzzybear]