Argh,

I haven't wanted to post this because I normally rant and rave when I'm in deep water and scared I'll never get out. But I know now you all here for me so I'm gonna lean on you if thats ok ?

I'm not dong so well....I've explored my depression and I know there is no Reason that I can see now for being depressed. But regardless I feel sad. I'm having what I think are panic/anxiety attacks and they aree hard on me. I've been in tears alot this weekend, feel alone when I'm really not. My best friend, and some online friends seem to be drifting,..whether they are or not I do not know.......

My "attacks" start with rapid thoughts that switch, I start thinking about old memories...or things that havent happened yet and fear they might. I then cry......alot.....I e-mailed my T but didnt get a response I'm not mad at all I know we've discueussed that before she can't always e-mail me back....well this evening before I was about to have another "attack" i acalled and e-mailed her...luckily I go to see her tomorrow......

I think I need to be put in a hospital.........

Dustin

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((((((((( Moonkin )))))))))))))))

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Fuzzybear said:
(((((((((((((((( Moonkin )))))))))))))))


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ty so much for your continued support!

[DePressMe]

Dustin, please know that I care...let me know if I can do anything to help out. I can relate to depression and anxiety. Please take care of yourself.

[pegasus]

Gentle hugs ((((((( Moonkin )))))))

You are doing really well, I have seen a huge improvement in you since you joined PC. Hang in there and remind yourself that you can cope and you will soon see your T.

Maybe you could ask your T to give you some coping strats to help you get through these rough patches.

Take care.

[ECHOES]

You're just beginning therapy, Moonkin.

There's plenty of time and lots more exploration to do.

As my therapist says often, "You're where you need to be right now."

Hang in there. Look how far you've come about the emailing! You let yourself do it now without holding back , and you don't draw conclusions about not receiving an email back because you've talked about it and you've integrated that within in you! You're doing great!

ty...all...*sheds a tear*

[BlueFaith]

(((( Moonkin ))))

[skittles]

moonkin u know im here for u.. and im not going anywhere.... if u need to pm me as much as u like.. even if its just to get something off ur chest.... i know all about panic/ anxiety.. it sucks but i know ur strong enough to get through it.... hang in there dear friend

((((((((((((((moonkin)))))))))))))))

i'm here too, going through some tough therapy just the same, gentle hugs, Jinny xoxoxoxoxo

dustin.......if you really think you need to be hospitalized....please discuss it with you T.......you really are making progress........we all have days of tears and sadness.....sometimes we know why ...sometimes we do not......you;re going to come through all this ok dustin...love you

[bipolar_bear]

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Dustin)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Take care of you.

BB

[drummergrl]

Hi Dustin!!!:

I'm sorry I haven't posted or pm'd you lately, but I have been real sick since the surgery a week ago. I do not have my results back yet, but they are supposed to be in tomorrow. I will try and email you when I know for sure, ok?
I'm in much more "pain" than before, or at least that I remember????, and I can't get up and rump around too well yet. Today my husband and I went to the mall to mull around for a while, but later on, I got to hurting too bad and we came home. I take an 800mg. tablet of Motrin for relief
and swelling and inflamation. Gee, Dolly Parton came to see me and I didn't even get to thank her for the boob job!!
Trouble is, she only did one side!!!! hahahahaha
I can't drive yet either, as when I use my right arm and try to pick things up, or bend over to tie my shoes, I feel a sharp pain in the wound site. It's very painful right now.
So, pls. forgive me. I haven't abandoned you by a long shot.

Take care, son!!!
drmr

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drummergrl said:


Hi Dustin!!!:

I'm sorry I haven't posted or pm'd you lately, but I have been real sick since the surgery a week ago. I do not have my results back yet, but they are supposed to be in tomorrow. I will try and email you when I know for sure, ok?
I'm in much more "pain" than before, or at least that I remember????, and I can't get up and rump around too well yet. Today my husband and I went to the mall to mull around for a while, but later on, I got to hurting too bad and we came home. I take an 800mg. tablet of Motrin for relief
and swelling and inflamation. Gee, Dolly Parton came to see me and I didn't even get to thank her for the boob job!!
Trouble is, she only did one side!!!! hahahahaha
I can't drive yet either, as when I use my right arm and try to pick things up, or bend over to tie my shoes, I feel a sharp pain in the wound site. It's very painful right now.
So, pls. forgive me. I haven't abandoned you by a long shot.

Take care, son!!!
drmr

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Its ok drmr!! I'm gonna PM you...lots of love....
Dustin

[sabby]

((((((((((((((((((( Dustin )))))))))))))))))))))

Like others have said here...you have come a long way since you began posting on PC. You have learned the give and take of relationships, you have learned not to think the worst just because someone doesn't email or pm you back right away. Your postings are more positive and uplifting. We can see you are trying so hard to work through your depression.

Dustin, you are making changes every day. Sometimes they may be small changes and you may not see them clearly. But as you progress in your therapy and growing and learning, you are building a good basis for yourself and you will begin to notice those changes. Hang in there hon....all good things will come to you!!

Hugsss
sabby

[DocClyde]

(((Dustin)))

Yes, hopefully the therapy helps you out more. Sometimes the beginning of therapy is like ripping open a sore that is just beginning to heal, but the therapy itself (believe it or not) is like putting an ointment on that sore, allowing it to heal properly...

[DePressMe]

Hi Dustin, I am just checking in to see if you are feeling any better today...know that I am thinking of you.

((((PC))))

ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty all sooooo much!

*hugs*

[TwilightDawn]

(((((((moonkin)))))))

I know those feelings well, times when I'm with my friends but feel silent, no reason for the depression but can't chase it off, and revisiting old memories are the worst...

But I hope you make it through just fine and see the light at the end of the tunnel, no matter how much work it is worth it.