Well, that was a huge set back.

A very long story short, I had a childhood friend that is the only person that has ever known about my trauma (he found out himself). We never discussed it after that. After he got engaged last year, he told me that he had romantic and sexual feelings for me since we were young. I've always felt the same way about him. We flirt and end up having sex shortly after, supposedly with his fiance's permission (which, in retrospect, seems unlikely). After that we go back to being friends and he tells me that the reason he didn't reveal his feelings for me when we were younger was because he knew what happened to me. That was a very serious slap in the face, especially after spending upwards of six years wondering why he didn't return my feelings. Adding insult to injury, his attitude toward me changed 180 after that conversation. All he wanted to talk about was sex from then on and stopped caring about me as his friend. Eventually I had to end contact with him because of it. Not exactly how I would have wanted to end our friendship.

I find the fact that he didn't want me because of what I've been through very discouraging. Now I'm wondering how I can possibly let anyone else help or know what happened. I had just gotten to a point that I felt like I was ready to start facing things. Thoughts?

Polyprotic,
I'm sorry that your friendship ended with him, sometimes friends do things that hurt us, betray us, disappoint us and let us down. You will know the right time and right person to share your history to, don't be discouraged - there are good people out there that you will have the opportunity to face things with. you have to follow your heart and try to heal from this friendship and what he did.

I think it's soooo hard to know who to trust after being burned by someone we *thought* we could trust. I think it's only natural to be more guarded after a betrayal and to be more careful about what we share and with whom. I guess the only thing to do is go slow and follow our instincts. You will eventually get to the point where you feel you might be able to begin to trust again. Have you talked to a T about what happened? They can be hard to trust too, but I'm sure you could find a good T to help you. That might be a good place to start.
Take care,
Darkrunner

Hope you have found some peace, polyprotic.

I'm sorry that happened to you polyprotic, I really am sorry. ThaCrew

We all trust the wrong people at times. Some of us more than others precisely because of certain kinds of traumas in the past, especially in our childhood. Childhood trauma and abuse can really screw up a person's "trust compass." I know that from personal experience and a loooooooong time in my adult years of trusting the wrong people.

But don't beat yourself up about it. Learn from it, continue to work on healing and you will get better at knowing who to trust and who not to. Although some of the people that one would think should be the easiest to spot for "not trusting" are very skillful at gaining other's trust. Trust, but verify. Trust your gut instincts. And use common sense.