[Little Me]

I'm sensitive to needing quiet sometimes and nobody in my family seems to get it!!! Ugh. It feels like I'm going to burst. They are all wound up and I'm getting stressed about going to work tomorrow and needing rest and feeling anxious and not rested from the weekend to begin to tackle tomorrow or any other day for that matter. Oh gosh. It's confusing because it's actually kind of nice how my daughters and husband are all having fun together with me some too but it's too late for me. I'm wanting to shut down from being "ON" all day.

[Honey Bee Sunrise]

I have moments when I can't handle all the noise and motions of people around me. When it's my family, I can usually just give them a look and say "STOP!"

[liveforfish]

I know the feeling well. I get sensory overload myself. I tell my family I need some alone time. I use ear plugs to block out the noise.

[Open Eyes]

(((LittleMe))),

Yes, I have that too, it is one of the symptoms of PTSD. What you need to do is you have to have a place to go where you are undisturbed. I have my bedroom and my husband knows that when I need a break and go and lay down, I need that and I need to know I will not be disturbed.

What I have found is when I get the way you are discribing, if I go and lay down and am quiet and left alone, I can focus on really just relaxing and letting go. I don't have to go to sleep either, I just totally let go and allow my mind to slowly wander, and after about 1/2 hour to 45 minutes I calm down and can get up and do things.

Yes, I know what you mean about wanting to stay envolved and enjoy family etc. But you need to take breaks and know it is ok to do so.

It sounds like you are getting ahead of yourself already anticipating tomarrow. I do that myself, so you have to take those minni time outs when you need them, it means your mind needs a rest.

You have to learn to recognize the times when your mind starts to go into that "hypervigilant" pace and that you have to stop and slow it down. And you have to find certain "slow down" distractions to help yourself from producing too much cortizol. If you do that you can keep yourself from having that "uncomfortable" feeling you are discribing. It takes time, but you can learn to slowly build up self calming skills to stop this from getting the best of you.

(((Hugs)))
Open Eyes

[Open Eyes]

Also LittleMe, what you have to understand is that when you do struggle like this you "can" learn to slow it down as I mentioned. I went to see my T one day and I was completely strung out and he had me close my eyes and think about a chalk board and write down the number 10 and erase it and he told me calmly to continue down to the number one.

By the time I opened my eyes again I felt much calmer. He explained to me that I had a build up of cortizol in my brain that was sending me messages of "run" and "be alarmed" and "danger". That by doing something calming, like changing my thoughts to the black board exercise, I was telling my brain, "no danger, no need to run" and the cortizol was then absorbed and no longer flooding my brain with the "urge to run and take action".

That is also what I accomplish by going to my room and having quiet, same thing, I take away that sense of urgency and I am quiet and gradually the build up dicipates and I begin to feel normal again.

So, this is what you have to learn to do to help yourself get rid of what you are discribing. And the more you practice it, the better you will gain control over it.

((((Gentle calm hugs))))
Open Eyes

[happiedasiy]

Dear Little Me,
Hugs for you, Being a teacher is a stressful job, having two teenagers, and husband along with responsibilities in/out of the house. Sounds like Open Eyes is right. You can call it whatever you like, mothers rest and reload time, a nap or a brain break.
This will benefit you and try the things like OE suggest.
This will also benefit the family unit because a better you, the better the family will be. And it will show your daughters that when you feel overwhelmed it is okay to take an energy break or rest.
(from my childhood, the word timeout came with a tone as if I did something wrong) but thats just me.
Listen to your body and mind as they tell us what we need.
As we get older everything changes and our energy levels are not the same. So you have to adjust.
You are an intelligent person, start to delegate your time which includes breaks. Your girls are old enough to be engaged with duties in the house and let them organize their time. Tell you husband what you need without getting too deep into the whys. Also just another suggestion Dad can take the girls out without you, daddy and daughters have their own unique relationships. Which is a positive because girls learn how they should be treated as a woman by the way he treats you and by spending one on one with each child. Going out and doing good healthy activities without you just because, not having to explain that you feel drained or tired.
Send the (3) away for the weekend would be great as long as you dont burden yourself with guilt/blame. It is not too late for you, you are overwhelmed, your bodys sleep bank is in the red, and from what I read on your About me page you have issues you are dealing with.
I hope that you are working with someone, this is not something you can do on your own. Your husband can be suppportive but a therapist, clergy or psychologist has the skills to unravel the past trauma while keeping you healthy in the present.
Or you can get away for the weekend, visit with a friend, or go to a hotel. Read, eat, sleep, and relax. Dont bring your trauma baggage with you, I mean dont go away and descend all weekend. Cry if you want/have to, then take a shower /bath then eat, sleep, and relax. Watch humorous television.
It sounds like you have a good family unit. And mom comes home feeling better and with more energy. Able to partake in bike rides, hikes, and other outdoor activities.
Maybe take a meditation or yoga class.
And keep posting here, it really helps!
Sincerely,
H.

[Little Me]

Originally Posted by Honey Bee Sunrise

I have moments when I can't handle all the noise and motions of people around me. When it's my family, I can usually just give them a look and say "STOP!"

I was SO giving those looks last night. Nobody cared because they know I can handle anything and I just hang in there. It was ok, I just decided to stay up late and watch something I wanted. I sacrificed sleep to have that alone time.

[Little Me]

Great example, OE, thanks. I am learning a bit to slow it down. I don't understand much about cortisol but I feel it is like an eternal fountain flowing in me. I need and want to stop the flow. Thanks again. I am so beat I can't even process anything. Hectic day at work, then after work for hours with appts. and family stuff. I'm supposed to be grading projects now but too pooped. Needing quiet and rest but I don't see where and how I can do it externally and internally is a new concept so can't rely on that yet.

[happiedasiy]

Needing quiet and rest but I don't see where and how I can do it externally and internally is a new concept so can't rely on that yet.[/quote]

Dear Little Me,
This works for me.
One internal technique only takes 1-2 minutes, give it a try.
I give this advice for people who have problems falling asleep.
It is simple.The important things are that you are sitting quite and close your eyes.
Start with a cleansing breath in and out. Close your eyes start with 100 counting backwards, breathing slowly and not rushing the numbers. An inward breath 100, pause, when exhaling release that number, pause, then an inward breath 99, pause, when exhaling release that number ect...
What this does is takes your mind away from all thoughts in your head.
It shuts down the thinking process to just the numbers and concentration on your breathing.

The pauses serve a purpose. They create an empty space between the numbers, a void for creation.

You can modify this by choosing one word that describes what you are feeling, an example might be frustration. So on that first inner breath 100 breathe in all of your inner frustration you are holding in your body, pause, and while releasing 100 you are releasing that frustration too. Pause, an inner breath 99 collecting that frustration, pause, and on exhaling ect.
By 80 you should feel different, everyone is unique. If you found you lost your count go back to 100. I rarely reach the number 10. I have lost count X times but thats the practice and I return to 100.

Doing this during the daytime
Find a quite room to sit, outside in a chair, or in your car.
Work the numbers and when you feel you have neutralized stop.
Stretching afterward might release some tension.
You might feel strange or lightheaded in the begining.
With little practice you should feel better then before.

[Little Me]

Sounds like an idea to try. I was so wiped out a couple of nights I fell asleep no problem it was the waking up part that is troublesome. I will give it a try. Thanks.