Hypocrisy

Noun: Hypocrisy

An expression of agreement that is not supported by real conviction.

Insincerity by virtue of pretending to have qualities or beliefs that you do not really have.

I'm triggered by hypocrisy. To me it is the same as lying. Lying triggers strong feelings of mistrust, anger and fear.

I feel threatened and UNSAFE. So terribly UNSAFE.

Triggers make me retreat and isolate. I feel confused. Lost. Betrayed. Taken for a fool.

I understand Purple Petals, really I do. I am triggered by hypocrisy and insincerity too .... and yes it does threaten my SAFETY too

You are no fool..... I am sending you all the healing thoughts I can It is the people who are insincere who are the fools

(((((((((((((((( Petunia )))))))))))))))

The only thing I can think of that might help you feel better.... is that SOME people might change their views?

Although not any of the people I have had this issue with.... they are totally entrenched in this way of being.

Otherwise, just IGNORE them. It's like walking around in a beautiful garden having to IGNORE half the flowers there though..... it STINKS

I become frightened if even I sniff a scent of insincerity. I don't know what is going on but I don't say it if I don't mean it and sometimes I would be better off to keep my mouth shut.

IMO at least some "insincere" people are game players

Enough said I guess

((((((Petunia)))))

I agree wisewoman...... good thoughts to you,
Fuzzy

(I mean sometimes I feel I would have been better keeping my mouth shut..... and I agree with the rest of what you wrote)

Yeah.

I definitely hear you on this.

(((((Petunia)))))

That you put this is PTSD Forum in not a mistake, beyond the idea of being triggered, imo. The issue of "lying" is a common one. IRL there are varying degrees of "truth." There's my truth, your truth, other truths, and the absolute truth. When our trust was betrayed and PTSD was created, we no longer had any gray areas of truth. Either it is true or it is a lie. Well...not really.

I know where you are on this. I lived there for many years. My T has helped me to slowly reassess my issue with truth along the way...and I'm beginning to see where I've been. I just posted in another forum about lying being a big issue for me...esp lying about me hehehe..

There isn't any immediately changing on this though. It takes lots of therapy. It just doesn't feel safe to allow others to not only tell the real truth (according to our views.) I think hypocrisy does belong to this grouping, as you said. But there too, imo, are gray areas we just don't see when we suffer with PTSD.

(((((PETUNIA))))) The only ppl we have to worry about is ourselves. Do the best you (we) can!

Hypocricy or Honesty

Both may hurt. I often walk away from a situation because my honesty will hurt people. Will it give me anything to hurt people? To say the truth? No, it will not give me anything. But hurt people? Yes my honesty would hurt people. So often, I chose silent rather then hurt.

Yes Petunia, some people are hypocripte and it hurt so much specially when you have chosen to say nothing.

If ever you want to talk, you have my email. I love you and I care more for you then you will ever know.

Much love!

Thanks everyone.

((((((((((((((Petunia)))))))))))))))

Sorry I didn't see this earlier. Have been away until this afternoon.

I'm sorry that you are feeling unsafe--I don't know the situation, but I hate feeling that way too. I think that when someone is a hypocrite, I end up feeling betrayed.

Wishing you much love and safeness,

Elizabeth

((((((((((((( Sweet Pet )))))))))))))))

I'm so sorry.

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Hi Petounia, I am sorry you have experienced the lies and hypocricy of people; I assume, however, that one way or another we all have or will have to experience that one day. Unfortunately, is a big part of our world. I, too, have experienced hypocricy in its highest degree, and I get very upset and angry, so I feel you. You have every right to feel that way.
Hypocricy and lying is what I can tell with assurance that,
I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT!!!!!
The best think we can do is to ignore these people and try to be better and more honest people ourselves.
Be safe from people like that

(((((((((((Petunia)))))))))))))) I am so sorry that someone has hurt you. Know I am here and I care. Lying is one of the worst thing someone can do. Please take care of yourself.

Walking away from a situation because honesty will hurt people? In my experience both walking away (from a "friend") and harsh, cruel "honesty" does hurt. But, I have found most times, it is possible to be honest without being cruel. I guess I still get that wrong at times though (as have many I have been in "contact" with in the PAST ..)

Please write to me any time Purple Petals, I care for you very much......

(((((((((((((( Petunia )))))))))))))))))

much love,
Fuzzy

((((Petunia))))

Sorry you have been hurt...deception is very cruel indeed...is core parts to lots of pain..please be gentle with yourself(s)...

Eva

The problem is, it's a personal thing and you can't ever "know" in others:

"Insincerity by virtue of pretending to have qualities or beliefs that you do not really have"

Notice the "beliefs that you do not really have." We can't truly know what other people's beliefs are. That's why it's so scary to think someone is being insincere, we can't know what's going on, if they're actually insincere and/or why. My T once said she felt compassion for me but I responded, "don't I get to say whether you're compassionate or not?" and she said, no, it was her feeling, she was the only judge of whether she felt compassionate. I think hypocrisy is the same thing; we can perceive and feel someone as not being sincere even if they are.

Post deleted by Petunia

Oh dear! I think my reply to Petunia was misunderstood or maybe it's me who is seeing it this way. Anyway I'm going to explain my reply.

A while ago one of my coworker was very hypocript with other workers and even towards myself too. She was doing a lot of damage and I knew it but I chose to walked away from this situation because if I would have said something 2 workers would have lost their job. I just chose to walked out. This is long to explain so I just wanted to let people know that my reply wasn't about anyone here. I'm sorry if this has caused any problems. It wasn't my intention.

I'm sorry Petunia! I just ask you to email me because I didn't wanted to talk about this in public.

Sorry!

I saw nothing wrong with your post time0. No need to apologize for anything.

My sad and confused faces are just about how I'm feeling in general, not towards anyone or their responses.

It's all good.