[Zen888]

Hi Everyone

I don't want to get into the personal details of what happened to me but I was traumatized recently after having a manic episode and being restrained in an abusive manner.

I have haunting memories of the incident that lead to paranoid thoughts, nausea, trembling, scared to go outside....etc. I am scared of the following things: ppl are out to get me....ppl are going to harm me or kill me.....ppl hate me...etc.

Even when I am around ppl that I know care for me and love me unconditionally......I feel scared.......alone....disconnected. My personality has changed since this incident.

How do I regain some sense of security and balance to my day?

HELP!

i am so sorry that this has happened to you. it must have scared you horribly! do you see a T IRL? perhaps you could get some help with some mental exercises to do to help relieve the stress that you are experiencing.

if i can be of any help, PM me.....xoxox pat

[Zen888]

I see a T....what is an IRL?

[PlanningtoLive]

it means In Real Life, Pilatus. I would definitely talk to your T or someone you trust about what has happened to you. Take care.

You might try writing out some affirmations.

Like

I survived.

I am loved.

I am safe.

I am in control.

I was never a big fan of things like that but I tried it in a difficult time and it did help . Saying it over in my mind kind of nips the fear thoughts in the bud for me and helps me keep going.

Being hospitalized can be very traumatic. I don't think some people realize that. I am glad you made it through that difficult time.

[froggie2]

[RainbowFaerie]

Something that helps me when I feel triggered:

I look around and see the things around me. Orient myself to now, I guess you'd say, and look at the objects there that were NOT there when my traumas occurred. Something that I do when stressed is I will pray, (I'm like that). I will say something like, "Fear not for I am with you", or I will think of an image of peaceful mountains. That's my "peaceful symbol". I carry a keychain with mountains on it and it says, "They will mount up with wings as eagles." Maybe do an affirmation.

Good luck!

RF

[Zen888]

Thank-you to everyone for their thoughtful and heart felt comments & suggestions!

Currently.......I feel emotionally numb......find no joy......just drinking fruit/veggie juice & water......one meal a day....stomach has the empty sensations.......but my brain has no desire for food. I have terrible flash backs of my traumatic event every single morning. I curl up in the fetal position and just feel paralzyed with fear. It's cold where I live so....gives me another excuse to stay inside.

I'm trying meditation a couple times a day.......positive images.....but all I seem to want to do is sleep.