[thickntired]

I was treated for everything under the sun in the mental health system: addiction major depression bipolar ocd eating disorder adhd borderline pd and so on. Today I was telling my therapist that the thing I can't get over is ptsd. She said all my other mental illnesses can in face be caused by ptsd. This completely makes sense because 7 years of my childhood are blacked out from ptsd so that was my first issue. I also always had certain fits of rage & anger (verbal) that never seemed to fit into any bipolar category. But ptsd often stems from pain which can manifest itself as rage. For me, I don't believe I'll ever get past the pain all together, but there is a sense of peace in knowing that there's a reason behind all of this. I'm reading The Boy Who Was Raised As A Dog and Doctors literally didn't believe children experienced ptsd until the 1980's!!! Children were believed to be resilient and bounce back. And even today not much attention is paid unless the child is horrifically beaten for years. What these stupid experts don't understand is we didn't have adult coping mechanisms, so our coping skills turn to self destruction, guilt, rage and basically set us up for failure.

[precaryous]

I've also been reading, "The Boy Who Was Raised As A Dog."
I am 59 y/o, had 16 therapists not counting inpatient therapists..hospitalized 6 times? 7 times? And I am just starting to hear now, "PTSD." Why was this never diagnosed for me before? We have not been treating the right illness. They even wanted to do shock therapy.
Asshats.

[birdpumpkin]

Children definitely do get ptsd. We've never been properly diagnosed as have no insurance; but I'm pretty sure I have it from our fire, and I see my son being the same way. He's worried about everything now and gets upset a lot about things that you wouldn't think would upset him. Of course I get the blame for it - my husband and mom both say he's "feeding off me" and he's just acting that way because he sees me when I get upset.

[Open Eyes]

It is important to remember that our knowledge about PTSD is still fairly recent. We are still studying it and we keep learning. Try not to be resentful for not having the help you needed before, before when not as much was understood about it.

I will say that more psychiatrists are being corrected for how they have misdiagnosed. It takes time to establish a better understanding. A lot of what we know now is still fairly new.

[thickntired]

Originally Posted by birdpumpkin

Children definitely do get ptsd. We've never been properly diagnosed as have no insurance; but I'm pretty sure I have it from our fire, and I see my son being the same way. He's worried about everything now and gets upset a lot about things that you wouldn't think would upset him. Of course I get the blame for it - my husband and mom both say he's "feeding off me" and he's just acting that way because he sees me when I get upset.

I'm glad you're insightful to your son's needs! That will be so very helpful as you can be there for him.

[thickntired]

Originally Posted by Open Eyes

It is important to remember that our knowledge about PTSD is still fairly recent. We are still studying it and we keep learning. Try not to be resentful for not having the help you needed before, before when not as much was understood about it.

I will say that more psychiatrists are being corrected for how they have misdiagnosed. It takes time to establish a better understanding. A lot of what we know now is still fairly new.

I have no resentments from my childhood as there was no such thing as child therapists. I am peeved that as an adult I've spent many years in the system where trauma was not connected to my mental health problems. I am happy that child therapist are everywhere today because it ruined my life.

[AngstyLady]

Well, your taking a step in the right direction-good for you! Being able to identify the root of all your problems will hopefully help you find piece of mind sooner than later.

[thickntired]

Originally Posted by AngstyLady

Well, your taking a step in the right direction-good for you! Being able to identify the root of all your problems will hopefully help you find piece of mind sooner than later.

Thank you, Angst Lady. I don't know about making peace, but I stopped escaping through drugs and self destruction. It finally hit me that I was just continuing to keep myself victimized.

[MotownJohnny]

That is very true. At times, I almost wish I did that - for a microsecond/ I know how destructive it is.

[thickntired]

Originally Posted by MotownJohnny

That is very true. At times, I almost wish I did that - for a microsecond/ I know how destructive it is.

Almost wish you did what?

[Purple Heart]

Hi

I do believe my trauma from childhood has a direct correlation to having Major Depression for 10 years as an adult! This is due to the fact that I'm now 'unpacking' the traumas done to me as a child and I find as I do, I'm becoming happier. But happiness is an alien feeling to me because I never experienced it as a kid. Even 'normality' is a strange occurrence and I sometimes freak out when my life is going normal. I want to quickly run back into some pain or trauma memory since it has been familiar to me for so long.

[thickntired]

I'm glad you're finding happiness, purple heart. I know what you mean about alien feelings. I only had chemically induced happiness for most of my life before I got sober. I think normal can be scary because I don't know how long it lasts or how to act. It's like I'm not myself because when I've been manic or depressed or whatever I had to act and fake a presence of normalcy. Also, now that I'm sober I can't blame erratic behavior on drugs.

[moniker2014]

For years they thought I had bipolar disorder. Now it's PTSD, an unknown autoimmune disease, and MGUS; and not bipolar disorder.

Folks with PTSD are more susceptible to many physical diseases.

From Pubmed:
2004 Dec
"Posttraumatic stress disorder and physical illness: results from clinical and epidemiologic studies." by Boscarino JA.

"Recent findings, indicating that victims of PTSD have higher circulating T-cell lymphocytes and lower cortisol levels, are intriguing and suggest that chronic sufferers of PTSD may be at risk for autoimmune diseases. To test this hypothesis, we assessed the association between chronic PTSD in a national sample of 2,490 Vietnam veterans and the prevalence of common autoimmune diseases, including rheumatoid arthritis, psoriasis, insulin-dependent diabetes, and thyroid disease. Our analyses suggest that chronic PTSD, particularly comorbid PTSD or complex PTSD, is associated with all of these conditions. In addition, veterans with comorbid PTSD were more likely to have clinically higher T-cell counts, hyperreactive immune responses on standardized delayed cutaneous hypersensitivity tests, clinically higher immunoglobulin-M levels, and clinically lower dehydroepiandrosterone levels. The latter clinical evidence confirms the presence of biological markers consistent with a broad range of inflammatory disorders, including both cardiovascular and autoimmune diseases."

Hi ho. <sigh>

[thickntired]

Oh no! I'm so sorry that now you're having to deal with physical complications on top of ptsd. Do you have a lot of problems with fatigue? I got off anti psychotics due to the health concerns. I decided a little mania beats stroke, diabetes or heart attack. I spent a year eating a healthy diet and exercising 5 days a week to gain weight and maintain obesity. All I've done is quit the seroquel and lost 15 lbs so far.

Are they sure your ptsd didn't cause bipolar? That's really strange to be misdiagnosed between those two. Have you found meds or therapy that help more with the correct diagnosis? I've heard both ptsd is curable and it's not. Mine goes back from childhood so I'd say no way. I was given Prazosin for ptsd but had bad side effects. Most of my memories are blacked out anyway. I did read ptsd causes brain damage. Certain parts of the brain don't develop to full capacity but I think only with kids.

[moniker2014]

I have problems with fatigue, but I find that exercise is the best way to fight off fatigue.

PTSD is not a cause for bipolar disorder, at least not that I'm aware of.

I don't do meds, although I have been offered, pressure, cajoled, pleaded with, I prefer to manage without meds.

As far as PTSD being curable or not, it depends on what you consider to be a cure. It's manageable, I can learn better coping skills, and the "condition response" part of triggers can be calmed down, maybe eliminated. But I will always be easy to traumatize, re-traumatize, and subject to flashbacks. There are environments and certain people who will always make me feel uneasy. Still, I don't believe I have to remember all the details of the traumas (over 48 years ago) to prevent myself from freaking out when there is no need. Just take deep breaths and I start looking at the items around me, making an inventory of sorts, anything to ground myself in the present. PTSD is a disorder of time. A reaction to a memory of an event, remembered as if it were happening again in the present.

[thickntired]

I have problems with fatigue, but I find that exercise is the best way to fight off fatigue. As far as PTSD being curable or not, it depends on what you consider to be a cure. It's manageable, I can learn better coping skills, and the "condition response" part of triggers can be calmed down, maybe eliminated. But I will always be easy to traumatize, re-traumatize, and subject to flashbacks. There are environments and certain people who will always make me feel uneasy. Still, I don't believe I have to remember all the details of the traumas (over 48 years ago) to prevent myself from freaking out when there is no need. Just take deep breaths and I start looking at the items around me, making an inventory of sorts, anything to ground myself in the present. PTSD is a disorder of time. A reaction to a memory of an event, remembered as if it were happening again in the present.

Yes, I agree about exercise plus vitamins like B-12 and a good sleep schedule. Actually, my therapist told me that ptsd left untreated can evolve into many other mental health issues like bipolar. I have another friend who is a therapist and no matter what her clients are having a problem with she first asks about trauma in their life. I guess without trauma it would have to be purely genetic and that's not common. And she said trauma is something that a client almost never brings into the conversation. The only medication I was given for ptsd was prazosin which I quit because of the side effects. What has helped me is since I got sober Jan 2013 I always freaking cry in therapy. It sucks but it really is cathartic lol. I blacked out long periods of times, and I agree with you that those memories are better left unknown. When I feel a trigger it usually makes me cry, but I am crying less and less as I open up in therapy. For the past 20 yrs when therapy was uncomfortable I just quit. Now, I am trying to work through the pain. Next to sobriety it's the hardest thing I've done in my life. I have an excellent therapist. When I told the past 10 therapists I felt survivor's guilt over my brother's death they interjected with oh you were just a child and there was nothing you could have changed blah blah blah and lets move on. Finally my therapist did not say that she listened and acknowledged my grief. I felt that for the first time someone finally validated my grief and that's a start.

Take Care