[kala83]

pretty much thats what I feel like all the time I don't know how I should feel.

I am out of a really horrible relationship...**** I nearly have been for a whole year of my life now.

and I yet I still struggle with feeling happy on a regular basis. I take ANY tiny little negative comment or compliant that someone says and it hits me like a sack of bricks.

since I have done PTSD therapy I have come to realize just how many times in my life I was maniuplated and used by friends, family people that I thought I could trust and that I really just couldn't.

when I look back at my life and I see how often this happened to me. It makes me parnoid, every time in my life i felt I could trust someone or be happy with someone it turns out I just be lied to or maniuplated in some fashion.

So how now do I move on and not be paranoid how do I truly be happy? each person gets to that place in their life in different ways.

I know that much.

Just cause I get into arguments with my fiancé does not makes him like ex I was with a year ago that stole from me an lied to me... and I know that but sometimes i don't feel like maybe brain does. I try as best I can to keep insane in my head but I don't know if I am really doing that.

Gosh know I am trying to...

the fact I am empathic does not really help me out much either, or just that I am superly emotionally sensitive.

learning how to cope with things in my life, with my issues I have and things I delt with in my life is not easy for me but I do the best I can but half the time I still feel like I am falling apart.

[Skeezyks]

[Unrigged64072835]

It's hard to readjust when you've been manipulated by people close to you. A lot of it for me has been mindfulness, being in the present and not in the past. I also did a lot of therapy to dig into why I was manipulated and how to be able to trust people (the right people) again.

[leomama]

Originally Posted by kala83

pretty much thats what I feel like all the time I don't know how I should feel.

I am out of a really horrible relationship...**** I nearly have been for a whole year of my life now.

and I yet I still struggle with feeling happy on a regular basis. I take ANY tiny little negative comment or compliant that someone says and it hits me like a sack of bricks.

since I have done PTSD therapy I have come to realize just how many times in my life I was maniuplated and used by friends, family people that I thought I could trust and that I really just couldn't.

when I look back at my life and I see how often this happened to me. It makes me parnoid, every time in my life i felt I could trust someone or be happy with someone it turns out I just be lied to or maniuplated in some fashion.

So how now do I move on and not be paranoid how do I truly be happy? each person gets to that place in their life in different ways.

I know that much.

Just cause I get into arguments with my fiancé does not makes him like ex I was with a year ago that stole from me an lied to me... and I know that but sometimes i don't feel like maybe brain does. I try as best I can to keep insane in my head but I don't know if I am really doing that.

Gosh know I am trying to...

the fact I am empathic does not really help me out much either, or just that I am superly emotionally sensitive.

learning how to cope with things in my life, with my issues I have and things I delt with in my life is not easy for me but I do the best I can but half the time I still feel like I am falling apart.

How much time between relationships and how long was the first?

[kala83]

the first relationship was probably about three years...I did not wait a whole long time to get back into another relationship probably less then a month.

I know that dosn't sound good but me and my fiancé had known each other as friends for a really long time and we both knew we wanted to date and really liked each other. So we just went for it for the most part....

but I also am polyamorus and have several other relationships going on with other people also....and none of my other partners seemed to think me doing this was a bad thing. They were just happy i was getting out of a bad situation and finding some that treated me so much better.

[Wander]

So sorry you are hurting so bad. Must be especially difficult being an empath. You didn't deserve to be treated those ways. Only time and therapy (using the tools you are given) and using the gifts you have can bring you to a place of peace. i hope you find it. Paranoia is horrible.