[MissCharlotte]

Is it possible to be in a perpetual state of PTSD?

I mean if things just keep happening does the PTSD just keep on coming? Even if you are in therapy and on meds/when bad crap happens again, is the PTSD avoidable? Or is that when generalized anxiety just haunts you forever?

Just wondering.

[Rapunzel]

Well, PTSD is an anxiety disorder. Most professionals probably wouldn't diagnose GAD when you have PTSD because the PTSD would account for it better. PTSD is so many things. If things keep happening, it makes sense that it would keep exacerbating it. That would be really hard. Therapy and meds would help to boost your protective factors so that you can cope better. I don't think that anyone can ever count on a life where things settle down and bad things completely stop happening, so your best bet is to improve your coping skills. Not everyone who experiences the same trauma always develops PTSD, and you can learn to be more resilient. I would never tell anyone it's easy though. It does seem like trauma sensitises us, and future trauma affects us more easily. But there is always hope too. You might want to talk to your T and ask how much better you can get at resilience.

[Mouse_]

What I am just begining to see at a gut level is just how much I live in a perpetual state of PSTD. Its like groundhog day, I relieve the past on every level and live in fear of the day because the day is yesterday and Ive not been able to see the reality of TODAY.

The more i see this the more I realise what a slow progress recovery is going to be. For me its going to be about learning new experiences so that I feel safe in the future.

Learning that what happened in the past wasn't normal and isn't something one has to experience on a daily basis.

I didn't realise how much I live in a dissociative state, I thought I was in reality, but I understand now that I live in the shadow of the past and then add some fantasy to it to try and gain some control over something thats already happened.

Now and again I register the enormity of how effected my perceptions have been and I get a moment of clarity but its scary too. It feels almost like I will become the hole in the doughnut if I let go my emotional baggage.

But with time and the right people in our lifes I believe there is hope.

[Perna]

I like the way you tried to word it, sister; it kind of felt that way for me. I "ended up" with GAD, because the various traumas weren't resolved/worked on at the time and they just seemed to continue/fester and be added to. It's like a little bit of sticky crud and how that builds up (mold/mildew? :-) I use to introduce/explain myself as "being afraid of my shadow." My T helped once by explaining to me that I was afraid of being afraid. I think the more tools one gets to help with that, to recognize and deal with things as they come up, the better things get. Then the past things do a better job of staying in the past and being the past size they really are (like the chairs in a first grade classroom which are the "right" size for first graders and don't look/feel small at the time but as an adult are tiny).

I think not only is it possible, it is exactly where I stand as well.

Sorry we have to share this common denominator.

PTSD in remission for 10 yrs......until I experienced 6 traumas in less than one year. It's been full blown ptsd ever since. Unable to manage symptoms and impossible to relax, and it's been over a year since the last trauma.

[ladylore]

Reading some threads as I am fairly new here and this one caught my eye. When I started counselling last fall I was under the impression that once I dealt with things then everything would be ok and I would never have a "bad" day again. Unfortunately that isn't the case as everyone has bad days and things do happen that can throw us off at times.

But through counselling I really know that everything changes - feelings, beliefs. If I am having a crappy day my body no longer registers it as an assault or automatically throws me into shock. And if something does blindside me, I have a support system in place as well as continued counselling. Things do change and get better, just not over night as I was hoping.

Wanted to throw my two cents into this thread

Ladylore

(((((((((sister))))))))
There are always things out there to remind us. I use to think it would leave forever. It does not. But it does improve with time. With help..........
RIght afer my mom passed on I was in BJs club..........saw the cases of ornage juice . My mom use to get them. Any ways like a fool , just stood there crying.
My husband had to take me out. LOLOLOL
Now 6 years later.........well i just walk by that isle.
Hope things get better.
A secret.........I do cry almost every morning alone.....very early. PTSD darn thing

[MissCharlotte]

Mouse said: </font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
What I am just begining to see at a gut level is just how much I live in a perpetual state of PSTD. Its like groundhog day, I relieve the past on every level and live in fear of the day because the day is yesterday and Ive not been able to see the reality of TODAY.

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Yes Mouse, this is exactly my truth also. It dovetails beautifully with my work on staying present, in THIS moment. Deep breathing, and meditating help. Deep thinking and analyzing don't. LOL

Did you ever see the movie, Groundhog Day with Bill Murray? Is that what you meant? I have often thought that I am like that character!!

Perna said:

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
I was afraid of being afraid.

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Yeah, Perna, this is such an accurate description. My T said that he thinks I spend a lot of time figuring things out so they won't happen again. I told him that he was very perceptive about how I think.

((Rainbowzz, Crackers, ladylore))

Thanks for weighing in on this and for your "two cents."

((((((((Muffy)))))))

I also love having early mornings to myself to process and cry if needed. Sometimes it's hard to allow myself the tears and sometimes one of my kids gets up early too and I can't be alone. So, I think I have to set my alarm even earlier......

Rapunzel said:

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Not everyone who experiences the same trauma always develops PTSD

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I find this aspect of trauma so fascinating. We are each so unique in and of ourselves! We process our experiences each in our own way, also based on our past experiences. That's why each of our therapies is an individual prescription and there is no "one size fits all," no matter how much we wish there were. Thanks for your input. I have been working with T and take meds for anxiety & depression. Yes, I'm working on it.