the continuing saga of the never-ending ptsd event...LONG POST

<font color="blue">
guess I need to post it all somewhere.
there's so much. And I've been spending most of my time posting to others... and chat for others... and still getting backlash... and not saying about what is going on with me...
I'll pick one main issue (though they'll all connected) the pain center.
We (me and my doctor/support team) have been requesting for me to see a medical pain specialist... all this year
and the insurance co. has refused. So they sent my personal info to THEIR pain ins "ho. " who contacted me (illegally all of it)
and when I "caught and called them on it" they denied it. then they denied authorization for the one doctor my team wanted me to see
then my attorney (who you all might recall is not working for me)
insisted I go to the ins co pain center
and my MD has turned... and she used to say she wanted me to see the one doctor, now doesn't care that I won't see that doctor and wants me at the pain center
well it won't be THAT pain center... because they know they got caught...
so they authorized AND made appointment for me to go for a 3 day evaluation at this other pain center
that was for Oct 1-3, of which I could not and would not do... I had no info on the center and no notice of my going
cause they'll get the answers that they want...
my attorney even sent me a letter saying it was authorized for 6 months, but she sent my MD a letter saying that I didn't want to go. huh? <font color="purple">
so I recontacted the latest pain center... and they denied that I ever had an appt in Oct.
well, let me back up,
when I saw my MD in Nov, she accused me of lying to her, that the attorney had told her that NO appts nor plans had been made
well, I have the letters, and my T has read them and he knows they're pulling stuff.
so I called the pain center and left a message, the one my MD told me to say to "INSIST" on a one day eval.
they are trying to make me settle.... and have been systematically denying everything
well... before they could call me back I had a few session with my T, and we decided that a one day eval won't show them how bad I am after doing ANYTHING for 8 hours (including and especailly an eval!)
and then when I quoted another thing my MD said to me, my T and I decided no way on the one day.
My MD said to me, Why not go to the pain center and get finality to your pain. HUH???? "finality" ??? my pain is real.<font color="blue">
Ok, let me back up again.
My MD kept insisting I was addicted to my pain med. And you know how someone on a narcotic cannot win any argument, just because.
My T had conversations with MD and she seemed to agree with him, that I am not addicted, no withdrawals etc
but my MD kept treating me like I had to get off the med and quit being addicted!
I've had 4 allergic reactions to pain meds I've tried just for the MD, this year alone
anyway...
I went off my pain med the begiinning of NOV. and was off thema few weeks before I saw my MD
no addiction, no withdrawal, only extreme pain.
So I did that to show her, and figured she'd see, and put me back on them.
ha.
all she did was shrug her shoulders.
I kept trying to get her back to the conversation of pain medication for me...
and finally said, so what are you going to give me for my pain?
and that's when she said, why don't you go to the pain center and get finality to your pain
she also said, NOBODY needs narcotics with all the other medications we have.
she has done a 180 in my treatment
and my T is ... well I won't say frustrated but he sure does see what's happening
My T IS a pain management specialist, just not an MD who can prescribe <font color="purple">
from the clinic they promise:
1 you will be off your pain med
2 you will have a physical therapist to assist you in life
3 you will have home exercise program
4 you will have a pain management specialist psychologist to help you
I HAVE ALL OF THOSE
in fact, MY T trained the psychologist at the pain center!
they don't seen to get the big picture though
pain and stress management
the big picture to them is money, (but not really because it would have cost them much less if they had given me the medical attention I needed at the git-go)
they stopped all authorizations.
they insinuated I have fraudulently been receiving eye care since the injury and pulled their authorization for that,(it can't be so, because they authorized the treatment, which I had more than 2 doctors verify the need for)
they de authorized my dentist, my eye doctor, won't let me see my neuro-opthalmologist, and they just quit paying my physical therapist this summer , they won't admit (yet) the opinion of my oral surgeon,
they haven't paid my MD for a year, yet my attorney denied this to ME (I even sent my attorney copies of the billings from the MD showing monies due since 10/03~))
for all I know, they quit paying my T. But he would never tell me.
They quit paying all my mileage and tolls and emergency phone, as previously agreed in mediation
I have called around to lawyers... and asked how to hire an advocate for me... they all come back with, that's what your attorney should be doing.
"my" attorney is one of the best in the area... and she will receive most of the money even if another takes it... an I can't find anyone who wants to go through 18 years of bad faith stuff that hasn't been rectified, for little money <font color="black">

BUT I have just now arrived at the main issue for me, and stress... if you still have time...
Ok. I have the right not to go to the pain center. I won't have any assistance but my T, and will have to continue with my injury... pretty much on my own if I don't go...
but if I go, well... it's a good possibility that they have already decided some prognosis... ya know? Since they have already denied they went ahead and had me scheduled for a 3 day eval
IF I do go...
they won't take my service dog. I have to leave him somewhere... stress for him and me and he just turned 12.
IF I do go...
I know I will be in excruciating pain due to the activity, the evaluations, the more than my 3 hours of functional time, my lack of sleep which occurs after I do anything, and plus they only have twin beds and that won't even hold the pillows I need for support...
and all the stress and worry and "shooting myself in the foot" thoughts...
and I will still end up without "anything." (I would still have my disability pay-loss payments though.)
"sigh."
well ... there's supposed to be a hearing in April. BUT then, there was suppposed to be one within 6 months of my injury... and I have NEVER had one... due to the attorneys ..for 18 years the hearings have been cancelled, postponed etc..
except for last one, when I said I couldn't... and now my attorney blames ME for NEVER having had a hearing
18 years of this crap.
Ok. So I tried to push the idea of the service dog accomodation, right, ADA and all that? to the pain center, MD, attorney and also because it is something I want THEM to pay for -the next one-
and they ask (my attorney too) WHY do I need a service dog? Well, legally you can't ask that. But... in trying to work with this,, I told them, reminded them of my menierres, due to the injury

then acted like they knew nothing about it!
well, I have been trying to see my ent for 2 years...
with no success so I went to his office, to make appt and to get copies of my dx and my hearing tests, ongoing showing loss etc
THEY HAD THROWN MY RECORDS OUT <font color="blue">

it just seems they have me every which was but loose
those records were from 2 ENTs that had verified my menierres, due to the injury, and all my allergies, including the medicinal allergies I have...
now I have no proof it's all subjective. WEll, my T did suggest I ask my attorney for a copy, sijnce it should be a matter of legal record...
so I wrote her (attorney) today.

Sorry for the long post. I'm trying to not get too depressed and go on with it all... but wanted you to know what's going on with ME if I don't phrase all my replies just "so."

Believe in Him or not --- GOD LOVES YOU!

Want to share your Christian faith? Click HERE

You know? If anything, you have a tremendous will power, you are a fighter, so don't throw the towell.
Don't let them get away, but cooperate and "play the game".
Most of the time is easier to wim by playing the game by their rules.It is harder the play the game, but it is more problable to win.

How did the pain eval go?

OMG so MUCH has happened to me since this... a month ago!

My attorney never replied to my Dec 9th letter requesting her legally required assistance. I see my MD on Tuesday. Last I saw MD she said she wished to contact my attorney since she had not responded to me by then. Now it's another month! So, no pain eval yet.

I ended up in the ER because they denied my eye care again, and they either paid off or scared off my eye doctor. I had a major flashback and was all but baker act'd... only for my psychologist taking responsibility for me, did I get out of that place. They had suggested that I receive home help due to my depression. My T had no idea what they meant and I hadn't followed up on it, but now we know that FL law allows for rehab due to depression (home help in cleaning and personal paperwork etc)

They still haven't paid my physical therapist ... the last they were paid is in October and that was for July billing. He continues to treat.

... can't think more right now.

Thanks for asking gloria!

Believe in Him or not --- GOD LOVES YOU!

Want to share your Christian faith? Click HERE