[gettinbetter201]

Good morning everyone,
This came to me while I was in the shower this morning. Well... it's better than singing, isn't it??? So here is my 2 cents worth...

Currently, what are your top 2 or 3 issues and what action are you taking to improve on them?

Here are mine:
<font color="red"> Social phobia: </font> this issue had me so paralized that by the time my sanity quiz results shocked me into action, I was isolating so much that I couldn't even get myself out to my NA meetings, dual disorder group, or even to make my counseling appointments. Now, I am just making myself step out of that comfort zone and make all of my pre-scheduled meetings, groups, and appointments. The work I've been doing on my self-esteem issue is also helping in this area because I am learning to accept and love myself just the way I am. I also have to remember that my ego is all twisted out of perportion and who the heck do I think I am to believe that everyone else is all wrapped up in me . Many of them are probably too involved in their own anxieties about being in a group of people.

<font color="red"> self-esteem: </font> this is something I have struggled my whole life with and I recently learned that it's not an easy issue to just cure. We must work vigilantly every day for the rest of our lives to obtain and maintain a healthy self-esteem. What am I doing? When my score of 92% came up for this issue, the first thing I did was move myself from the bottom of my "people's list" and place me at the very top where I belong. This may seem and feel a little selfish at first, but you just have to remember your motives for doing this. It isn't to be insensitive or selfish about other people's needs. It's about learning how to start loving yourself and take care of you... because ain't anybody else gonna do it baby. Period!!! Next, I decided that I need to start putting just as much focus and energy on my good qualities and accomplishments as I do my "unfinished parts" (I refuse to call the defects). I remind myself every day that God made me in His image (the bible says so). He doesn't make junk and I am one of His very special, beautiful children. Next, I am working on constructing a list titled "what does self love mean to me". Here's a fun one... I've been talking for months about making a "me" book, which I felt would be a fun, creative way to get to know myself and who I am. Then one day as I was trying to find a web site to start a journaling on, I was introduced to the concept of blogging. I decided to create my own blog, which is like having your own web site and it's free. It revolves around a particular subject or topic and mine happens to be about, guess who? Me. It's curently under construction, but it's beginning to take shape and I welcome any of you to visit my blog to learn more about me, see my creative side, or even if you're just plain nosey. I can create friends groups and would like to add some of you to my list of PC friends.

<font color="red"> Eating disorder: </font> this issue still has me totally stumped and it affects every area of my life. It's fueling my depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem. I absolutely hate being fat, which makes it extremely difficult to accept and love myself exactly as I am. And the binge eating is making me literally sick and causing other medical issues such as IBS and severe sleep apnea. Maintaining an unhealthy weight also puts me at a higher risk for developing some major health issues and diseases such as diabeties and even cancer. What am I doing now to work on this issue? I keep trying to get back on my healthy lifestyle plan and just end up going right back to the binging. So all I really can do at this time is keep thinking about it and trying to come up with a solution, or at least the willingness to stop shoving food in my mouth when I'm not experiencing true physical hunger. And this morning I decided that I'm going to try applying the principles of my NA recovery. I know the 12 steps can work with any addiction and I'm sure my binging is just another manifestation of my disease of addiction.

I'll sign off for now and hope some of you will share your progress with your own issues. Just make it simple, you don't have to elaborate like I did. This is usually called rambling... Sorry

gb

[Perna]

I have physical issues as my #1 concern and I need to work on exercising more and losing weight so my blood pressure will decrease and, hopefully, my asthma and thyroid and other secondary conditions will improve.

[justpassingby]

1. Decide whether to stay in loveless marriage or divorce?

Just found out yesterday he doesn't love me anymore during our marriage counseling so I still don't know what to do. He's willing to stay in marriage so far.

2. Bipolar symptoms

Can't even concentrate now on them due to my dilemma.

3. Lose weight

I'm eating more now than ever and need to lose weight badly to gain some self respect and dignity

[mlpHolmes]

Wow! GettinBetter! Thank You so much for your great question -(Definitely worth more than 2 cents!) I really like the way you listed your issues & then stated the actions you took to improve on them. Very insightful. Thanks again!

[mlpHolmes]

Just wondering. On your first topic you stated "he doesn't love me anymore" is this your perception or indeed the way he feels?

Then you ask whether to stay in a loveless marriage or divorce? and "I still don't know what to do." I think you do know.

[lhanson]

What a great thread idea!

Social Phobia: This has really become a problem for me within the past year, especially since after my diagnosis in Jan. All I want to do is isolate myself and avoid new social situations (especially with large groups or in situations where I feel a strong power difference). School is what helps me the most to step out of my shell. I've also been going out with my boyfriend to social events even though I really really resist it. Also, I have recently started volunteering at a local Elmen. school tutoring kids. I'm taking baby steps, but they are better than nothing!

Obessive thoughts: I struggle with obsessive negative thoughts off and on pretty regularly. When I get into waves of them it is really hard to control, but what helps is reminding myself that everything will be alright and even if something bad happens, I will get through it because I am strong. I am currently in a phase of not having the thoughts as strong, and so I've been praising myself a lot for that.

PTSD: I really thought that this was an issue that I was through with, but taking that test brought it to my attention because it got the highest score in this area. I am going to take my tests results to my counselor the next time I see her to discuss things, and then I'll go from there.

[Itadakimasu]

Well, it seemed like I didn't have too many problems, but:

Schizophrenia: I have a lot of trouble belivieving this, even if I did get 83 on the test. I don't think I'm delusional; despite what anyone else has to say about that.

General Coping : I do get incredibly stressed out; however I have really been working on that and how I cope with stress. Despite that it's still hard to get through the day, I'm pleased with the fact that I'm even trying to change.

Anxiety/OCD: Mostly gone for now! I hardly have any anxiety past normal levels.

[ifonly]

Hi there,

I also deal with social anxiety, in addition to gen'l anxiety and depression. How long have you dealt with the social anxiety? How has one on one therapy worked for you?

What tools have you tried that have worked for you? <font color="blue"> </font>

[Typo]

Wonderful idea gettinbetter201!!

Parinoa- I've delt with this my whole life...ever since I was about four..hard to belive I know but I have. I'm really tired of thinking everyone is out to get me and it making me miss out on certain things and keeping me from a distance from people. Over the past few years my social skills and my ability to communicate has really decreased and it gets worse and worse each year.

Schizophrenia symptoms- I'm not sure I have schizophrenia but I have almost all the symptoms...and they are starting to increasingly get in the way of my life. I've had them for about three years now..and I didn't realize it until I took my on-line psychology class. I'm trying really hard to accept the fact I may have schizophrenia or psychosis..it's hard. I've had the voices for so long I just thought it was normal. This is probably the biggest issue for me right now seeing as it is increasingly affecting my day to day life and my ability to perform in school.

Thearpy- This kind of goes back to the two items above. I've always been someone who is very closed off. I'm someone who hates to ask for help. Starting thearpy is scary for me..it means I have to admit I'm dealing with these issues and that there is something wrong. That scares me to death...but I know in order to live the life I want to and to be able to have a sense of reality I have to go and see a therapist..I have to get help for these issues..

Once again great question getttingbetter201!!

[confusedgurl08]

1.Social phobia: i have had social anxiety and panic attacks since about the age of 6 or 7. School was the worse and back then no one said anything about this being a disorder and i always thought that i was a lone and weird. Everyone always said i was just shy and i would grow out of it. well i never did. i am working really hard to overcome this or at least to manage it well. Since i have been grown and on my own i have always made other people make my appointments for me and then would be to nervous to even go. i didn't want anyone to see me shake and have red blotches. Now just recently i have decided it is ok to see a psychiatrist or therapist because they will know what is going on and i am sure they have seen it before. i just have to work on other appointments/meetings/get togethers/and driving or going to the store during the day. i have a lot of work to do but deciding to go see a psychiatrist and not be ashamed or run away is the first step.

2.Self esteem:i am trying my hardest to love myself for who i am. I takes a lot of hard work, i am not there yet, but i am trying and i am happy to say that yesterday February 29 2008 was the first time in my entire life that i said out loud that i am pretty. i really felt weird, good, but at the same time scary.

3.bipolar rapid cycling mood swings: This one seems to be the hardest. i tried for so long to "fix myself" i realized it is too hard and i need help. So i am seeing a psychiatrist and when i get stable i will find a therapist. i am also writing down all of my moods and it is a lot per day. And as soon as i start my medication i will track the side effects and my moods as well. This is because i have a problem when i get to feeling better i stop taking the meds and completely forget about the bad times, and think there was never anything wrong with me. i have just recently after 4 years of doing this realized that it is my mind playing tricks on me. So by tracking my moods I can look back when i start to feel better and see how i was before. And i can also find my triggers and remember what meds i have been on and when. It is just the best thing to do and i can't believe i didn't do it sooner. But better late than never.

4. Obsessive thinking: This is one of my triggers for my severe mood swings. i haven't mastered this one or even began to, but as soon as I get this one under control i think everything else will fall into place. i am very opptomisstic about getting help and helping myself as well.

This was one of the greatest exercises ever thank you for the post.

[gankutsuou]

1. Schizophrenia, I've had the symptoms for about 6 months now, although I doubt that I am it's a strong possibility, as I've had alot of people informing me that I have been talking to myself for several minutes on end.

2. Self esteem, this has allways been a big issue for me. As a child I went to a mainly expatriate school and as a result, many of my friends returned to thier home countries every year, leaving me to build up my friendship group almost on a yearly basis, although I only ever managed about two per year. This combined with the fact that I was severely bullied led to my low self esteem.
I've recently come out of the closet and had three of my best friends abandon me completely, which has only made the situation worse.

3. Social Phobia, this ties in with my low self esteem, making it harder for me to meet new people. I'm absolutely terrified about what people think of me, and if I'm left on my own with a person I'm not familiar with I'm afraid of not being able to say anything interessting and awkward silence. This fear has lead me to drink excessivly, to the point being paraletic at social event's in order to try and relax, and in one extreme case I had to be taken to hospital, where my heart actually stopped beating for about 30 seconds.

As to what I'm going to do about it? I honestly don't know apart from therapy.

[Perfect_Escape]

My biggest ones were Anxiety, Self-Esteem, and depression. Anxiety and self-esteem didn't surprise me. I've been dealing with those for along time by myself. (trying the self-help route) but depression?! I

Anxiety: When i start to get panic attacks if i can i'll wash my hands. Just to get my mind off whatever it was that made start to panic. If i can't wash my hands i close my eyes and breath deeply. Though i've found that doesn't work during severe attacks. Nonetheless i still close my eyes try to get my mind to wander or anything that'll get my mind off it. I picked up counting as a way. Like counting the celing tiles, the lights, whatever. That sometimes works.

Self-esteem: I have no idea! I tried doing that "you're pretty" thing. Just kept telling myself that over and over. Sadly there's this little voice in my head that keeps asking why i'm doing this because no matter how many times i say that it won't change the fact that i'm ugly. So no help there.....

Depression: Lately i've been feeling down yes, but that's human nature right? I've lost intrest in alot of things, including food. I use to eat a ton of food, now i'm happy with a pepsi. There are times when i want to just break down! Again no help in this catergory. I have no idea what to do to help me in this one. So....i'm still learning little tricks for my self help manual.

I'm finding it harder and harder to be myself though, like there's some big black cloud consuming me. I don't know what to do or how to cope with any of this!

....That was a good exercise! It felt good to get all that off my chest. I think you've given me another idea on how to cope so thanks. Really glad you posted this i enjoyed it. Thank you so much!

<font color="purple"> My current top 5 concerns are:
1. Self-esteem (75)
2. Eating Disorders (60)
3. Mania (60)
4. Schizophrenia (50)
5. Dissacociation (50)

I know self-esteem and eating disorders here go hand in hand...fix one and I'll fix the other I think. The problem is that for as long as I can remember (and even before that, apparently) I have had a really poor body image of myself. I came up with a little theory, a plan, if you will to try and help me. I havn't done this little thing yet...but when I stick too it I really wonder if it will work?

The mania thing can be very disruptive in my life, it makes it so I can't really concentrate, and it leads to over eating too. The problem is... I don't know how to really mange it, let alone fix it.

As for Schizophrenia/Dissacociation?
Noooo clue what to do.
</font>

[ujaz]

Self esteem is always a hard one, no matter the complaments people give ect its hard to feel it. When you've growen up constantly denegrated, put down & belittled it becomes internalised & no positive afermation seems to overcome it. Complaments can even seem sarcastic or just to humer one, the poor self image ingranes itself to such a degree little but therapy can shake it. I know only to well your pain & wish you the best to overcome it all.