Attitudes towards ...

... taking meds.

Okay in a convo tonight with a good mate who now lives in Sydney. He split up with the chick he married after 4 months. This is someone who supported me through my thesis. We talked about depression and he said i should take what made me feel better.

And so then you find out people's real feelings ... this is our conversation tonight. The second half of the convo ... is how so many people feel.

So in response to my 'drugs or no drugs' thread - here's your answer to the 'wondering what people think' aspect - not in black and white, but in nice Times New Roman.

nossy: me? im good
jbb:
nossy: well, only recently good
nossy: went through a period of clinical depression
nossy: the whole dicorve thing got to me pretty bad
nossy: but ive bounced
nossy: so now, im good
jbb: eeeeek
nossy: got antidepressants, but when i got home with them i refused to take them
nossy: decided it was a sign of weakness and im stronger than that
nossy: so fought through it

Anyway. Just food for though.

would you try to will yourself to get over a broken leg w/o a cast, crutches and other medical attention?

would you attempt to return to normal life after a major vehicular accident w/ multiple traumas including internal bleeding w/o emergency medicine?

our answer to the above would be resounding nos.

it sounds very hard to be stuck in a place where taking medications is a sign of weakness instead of a sign of healthy acceptance of disease/disorder.

we understand your stance as we come up against it in other ppl from time to time.

best case? they realize their lives can be easier, not as grueling, not as painful, not so overwhelmingly pressured by adequately treating their disease/disorder with prescribed medication.

worst case? they continue to suffer needlessly due to pride or other self placed blocks to well being.

good luck as you revisit this question again. our life/ves wouldn't be possible w/o medications. living with a huge hole in our soul, crying under the desk at work or in the bathroom, struggling through the week so we could collapse on the wknd in an emotionally unstable drained lump......that was life before medication. it was a life but not the one *I* wanted.

now with medications and therapy and other things plugged in to place life has a different quality that we'd never thought possible.

we never thought it was possible as we suffered alone for far too long.

meds are NOT THE ANSWER....they can be one answer for many though

best wishes dsf

I hate, repeat, hate, the idea of having to rely on meds. It makes me feel weak, insecure, incompetent, inferior, deranged........just plain AWFUL.

Always hated it, always will.

Yea i hate it too desperado.

'nossy' being the guy i'm friends with ... who helped me through a lot of stress a few years ago ...

and even he thinks i'm weak.

so pretty sure that's the attitude of a lot of people i know, just to extrapolate.

freakn stupid. ;(

Meds gave me a quality of life that I didn't think was possible for me, but I also agree that they aren't the total answer in dealing with a mental illness. I have to take responsibility for making my environment condusive to wellness, keep healthy relationships in my life & discard the unhealthy ones, reduce stress & get support & medical advice if I start relapsing into an episode of mania or depression. My mother committed suicide when I was 15. I believe if the meds available today were available back then she could be helped (had bipolar 1)--Suzy

I think a lot of people have the impression that depression meds change a person's personality and character and they don't. When you have a headache, you take an aspirin and you don't have a headache. AD's are sort of like that. They're not "happy pills" they don't make you happier or better able to solve problems you may have in your life or make sadness "go away" in some fashion so it doesn't matter that your significant other has left you or you've lost your job, etc. They just make the headache go away so you can concentrate on solving the problems in your life. Yes you can "struggle through" depressive episodes and be "strong" but you can do the same with headaches too but we don't because that's kind of idiotic? I'll suffer through a headache for a bit to try and see where it's coming from so I can fix the problem (poor eating, sleeping posture, med side effect, etc) but then I take an Advil or drink water/eat well (if its dietary or dehydration-related) and get on with my life.

Stuff like this makes me feel crap. If he can get over it, why can't I?

I totally agree, Suzy & Perna. Very good points. I believe that meds are just one piece of the whole puzzle. It is up to ourselves to truly get better.

I also want to clarify: I feel weak, inferior, insecure, etc., due to being on meds, but I don't perceive others that way (who are on meds). Hope that's clear; I don't mean to offend anyone.

Des

I guess if you can live with your 'depression' then maybe it's not bad enough to take meds. I really couldn't. I think I would have killed myself had I not taken them... So in a way they are saving me from myself.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
ouch said:
I guess if you can live with your 'depression' then maybe it's not bad enough to take meds. I really couldn't. I think I would have killed myself had I not taken them... So in a way they are saving me from myself.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Yea I've been through that argument with myself ... this is more like "this is what someone who told me to take stuff actually thinks about it".

I wish he'd just been honest with me at the time.

I look at it this way...

There are some people with diabetes that can control their illness without medication, by "simply" watching what they eat and adding exercise to their exsisting lifestyle. I say "simply" because I am sure to those people it is really, really hard work!

The other type of diabetes is much harder to control. Those people have to watch what they eat, add exercise and need the medication insulin regardless of how vigilant they are with their lifestyle. This group works as hard as the first to manage their illness, but requires medication nonetheless.

With regards to my mental illness.........I am part of the second group!!! I work very, very hard to manage my illness, but I need my medication to help me keep wanting to work that hard.

I am not debating whether it's good or bad or questioning anyone's decisions

I guess I just got confirmation from that conversation that it's often stupid to tell people IRL what's going on.

Always good to learn these lessons.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
drunksunflower said:

I guess I just got confirmation from that conversation that it's often stupid to tell people IRL what's going on.

Always good to learn these lessons.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

AGREED

I was always afraid of drugs and against them. I thought they would change who I was. And I didn't want to be dependent. I still try to take as little as possible. Sometimes it makes you feel odd having all those prescription drug bottles lined up - like what's wrong with me? The other thing I noticed is that when I don't take the drugs I get back to the same fears about them and don't want to take them. When I do take the drugs, I don't feel that way at all - instead I feel more like myself and in control. Because I was without drugs for so long I'm now learning who I am really. Wish I hadn't been so stubborn and fearful earlier about them. I still don't like the idea of being dependent on them though - I hope that eventually with life changes I won't need them. Hard to tell. Plus they can be hard on the body.

I resisted taking meds for a long time too. I'm glad I finally did, though. My medications have helped me a lot. I tried to fight agoraphobia by myself, but I wasn't successful. Medication helped me get over agoraphobia and panic attacks and eventually I didn't need the medication any more. Recently, I went through about 8 months of depression without taking any meds -- convinced that if I tried hard enough, I would get better. I finally started taking Lexapro, and it has made a big improvement in my mood.

So, just like anyone with any disease that requires medication, I wish I was healthy enough that I didn't need medication, but I'm glad that there are medications available that can help me. My uncle committed suicide this summer. He was a wonderful, creative, compassionate person -- an incredibly gifted musician with 3 children and 4 grandchildren and a large extended family who loved him dearly. His pain got to be too much, though and he isolated himself and didn't reach out for help. The reason I finally decided to take medication for my depression is because I didn't want to end up like him. Losing him has been devastating for my family. It is so hard to accept that he is gone. It feels like such a waste. He battled depression off and on throughout his life. He refused to get therapy or take medication. Maybe if he had, it would have saved his life. So, I decided that when I need help, I will ask for it. I work on my coping skills and I try to get by without medication, but I have accepted that sometimes I need medication. I'm glad I have the option of taking something that helps me.

It may be a negative viewpoint and I know LMo for example would probably strongly disagree. But for me it definitely spells out why NOT to disclose to friends ... and I should add that this guy is 28, smart, was the most supportive friend ever when I was going nuts over my thesis, and is really amazing in general - but that's still his view on this.

Makes me think of all the dumb social marketing mental health awareness campaigns. And how the cut-through (effectiveness) is probably zip zilch nada nothing.

I am not dissing or demeaning anyone's decisions. I'm just venting a little about how even people who seem to think drugs are a good option actually think it's a cop-out (a real test when they consider taking them themselves i guess).

don't mind me i'm just kinda blah and highly relieved i haven't said anything to him this time.