hell, i dont even know where to put this

Hi reflection. I'm going to see what happens. What with this talk of the extension now. As far as the prescriptions go. I get my klono for $4. But the lithium, lamictal and invega i get from my pdoc. I can get the lithium for $4 but he was just about to take me off of it. I have health insurance it just dont cover any mental health, so some meds i can get for $4, well most of them. The exception being the lamictal. That one will cost me in the $300 dollar range and no one can afford that unless your Ozzy Osbourne. From what my pdoc said the last time i saw him was if my insurance charges me that much for the lamictal i'd have the same problem with the invega. When i do get meds i go to Walgreens and pay the $4 because my insurace covers most generics at that price. I would like to go to a different pharmacy but if another storm comes and wherever i end up i might lose out and get stuck. With walgreens your in the system everywhere.

A few weeks after Katrina i had to go to a mom and pop pharmacy and beg for insulin prescription for my cat. I brought them the bottle and they said as long as i was there they would continue to fill it. But took me two days of begging and alot of stress. I was with a mom and pop pharmacy before so thats my problem with going with one again.

I dont know if there are any schools are clinics. We have alot of universities around. Thing is to get to anything you have to travel an hour at least each way. And if there is traffic its worse. The closest one i think is the LSU school of denistry, but that wont help.

I'll ask around on the local forum we have down here and see if anyone knows anything about the schools.

Thank you (((((((reflection))))))))

hey pheonix. how are you?

I'm doing the free state run thing now. The only other aveune is up. And up isnt in my book. Up is too much money. I had called a bunch of therapists right before i started seeing mine. Well right before family services came back here. And the ones i called wanted something like $200 a session and for me to go twice a month. I said no way. So i just held the other end of the rope from ya'll here till my counsler came into my life.

(((((((((pachyderm))))))))) thank you for the hugs. their nice and warm.

chal

i know too - i'm sorry

((((((((starlite))))))thank you and im sorry for you too. it all stinks.

I know how hard it is to keep going on and on and on. It's four years now, and it's just so depressing. It's easy to keep fighting for a while, but so hard to have to keep fighting for so long.

My mom still doesn't have walls, but she's living in her house anyway while she tries to work through the bureaucracy of the Road Home.

It's really had to readjust to the new reality, and all too easy to finally lay down and give up.

I totally understand about the doctors and hospitals. I lost nearly every one of my doctors, the ones remaining are overbooked and overstressed, and waiting times are awful. My mother's doctor suggested she go straight to the emergency room with her recent infection because it takes weeks to get in to a doctor's unless you have a long relationship with them. And the hospital situation is plain scary. How many are left at all?

I'll ask my therapist next time I see him if he has any ideas for you. I know he keeps up to date on what programs are available.

Is your area dangerous now? I'd never ever thought of Chalmette as dangerous but if there are still lots of abandoned homes and few parish funds, I can see where it could become that way. I have a few acquaintances who have said it was getting better in the area, and some of those who moved elsewhere are missing the unique community of Chalmette and returning home. But I also see in the newspaper that they're trying to get neighbors to buy the abandoned lots in their area? I guess it's nice if you can afford it to have a double lot, but it does nothing for increasing the level of services. In some ways it must be like being pioneers in a newly established area. The parish seems to be very low on funds, and the homes per square mile are so low again.

(((Chalmette)))

I wish I had more practical information to give you, and I will see if I can find anything out.

chalmette, i did a search and here is a school that looks fairly close to you that has a counseling center open to the commmunity. it says the fee is $15 but they give special consideration to those that can't pay this fee. it's our lady of holy cross college. even though they are a Catholic school, therapists can't talk about spiritual things unless the client brings them up so don't let that get in the way of finding help.

((((((Dinah and your mom)))))))))

How's ya momma and 'dem?

Yeah it seems that 'Ain't 'dere no more' is the southeast region of Louisianas motto. There isnt much left when it comes to hospitals. Ours down here was so severly damaged it had to be demolished. There is a makeshift fema trailer hospital. But anything more than a broken bone or stitches you need to make the trek to University or Ochsner. Hopefully one day the parish will stop fighting over the crap about building a new hospital down here and just do it.

Where is your mom? I know so many people still trying to get back on their feet, its ridiculous. And Road Home, thats a joke. Tell your mom to contact the St. Bernard Project. I'm pretty sure you can reach them through Camp Hope down in Poydras. They are at the old PGT Beauregard School. The St. Bernard Project was organized by that newscaster. Don't remember what channel sh is on. They come in with volunteers and tradesmen and complete a house for move in. Its all done on first come first serve basis, but with the summer on us there's gonna be alot of volunteers down here. Google St. Bernard Project and Camp Hope (in St Bernard, Poydras). Volunteers come out of there for the entire area. Don't matter where she is, they'll help.

Yes lots of abandoned homes and parish funds, thats funny Dinah. I know people breaking the contract with Road Home and moving away. And a few moving back. But those few have been working on their homes for 3 years now. My neighbor on the left is a prime example of that. This July he will finally be back in his house again. Talking to him the other day, he said he shouldnt have taken Road Home to rebuild. He's been regretting doing that for two years now.

I would love to meet the people you know who have good news about st bernard. I wonder if they connected to the politics down here.

As far as getting bad down here. At the corner gas station three days ago there were two men arrested for selling crack. That one is in the newspaper. At the Dollar Tree across the highway a woman (volunteer) from New York was chased down and run over by a dump truck. Mistaken identity. Not in the newspaper, but saw with my own eyes. I chased off two kids the other day up to no good, cops caught them and took them in for truancy. I could go on and on. But drugs and guns are in the Parish almost full blown as the city is.

lol. Thats one of the many names i've been titled. A pioneer. Sometimes i feel like it. But it hurts to be called that. In this day and time, i don't think many people know it looks like a third world country here.

I attached a letter that my mom just wrote this morning and mailed off to the parish president, Craig Taffaro. Kinda give you a look-in. Well it says the file is too big to attach and i can't think of another way to post it. If any one wants to read it maybe i can send it in a pm. I'll try too. If ya want just pm me.

chalmette

Hi reflection. I appreciate you doing that research and finding Our lady. I know exactly where it is. Im pretty sure its Marrero. I dont know the westbank of the river to well. I know where Algiers Point is though.lol.

Getting to Our lady of Holy Cross would be a trek for me, even though looking at a map its not that far. I dont' have a vehicle thats reliable to get me out of St Bernard. And i'm scared to drive it even here. I would have to find some place closer.

Thank you for the effort. I really do appreciate it.

(((reflection)))

My mother isn't in St. Bernard, and at least part of her problems result from poor choices on her part. But it is a hopeless mess trying to get funding from the Road Home, talking to one person, coming close to getting somewhere, then getting transferred to someone else and having to start all over. She's out of funds, and I'm not feeling too confident of her having more than the bare minimum in her home. Frills like interior doors are a stretch.

The good things I've heard were mainly from an officemate who didn't fare too badly between insurance and Road Home money. There seems to be a *lot* of variation in Road Home disbursements. She's been able to rebuild, and she says that some of her neighbors are starting to coming home so she's feeling more optimistic.

But from what you say, it's not the same place to come home to. I can't tell you how sad that makes my heart feel. Because you guys were so geographically isolated by water particularly before the interstate (showing my age here), you always seemed to maintain that small town feel. Like so many other areas that the city grew out to meet. Of course, suburbia grows out to meet everyone, even with geographic isolation. It's such a shock to try to wrap my brain around crime and danger and Chalmette at the same time since it was such a close knit community.

The lack of infrastructure is hard to overcome, since you need infrastructure to bring people back, but no one wants to come back until the infrastructure is in place. I imagine it's as hard for the leaders to adjust to a new reality as it is for anyone else. Maybe even more difficult. From the outside, that's the main sense I'm getting. That leaders are trying desperately to get back what they used to have. I can understand your frustration and anger, and I share it. Even state services seem to vary a lot parish by parish.

I hate to be one of those people, but do you have any ability at all to get away from there to a healthier part of the region or even out of state? Your parish does seem to be particularly hard hit by everything. It takes a lot of effort to live with so much change and so little infrastructure, and it's bound to exacerbate any mental health issues.

I'll PM you. And I'll check with my therapist to see if he has any ideas.

Your officemate has been lucky. Not alot of people got things taken care of like that. It took me 8 months to get a fema trailer. This person says this and that person says something else. And fema taking me off the waiting list 3 times didnt help. Had to sign up again and be at the bottom all over. I fianlly did get my trailer, then got sick living in it. lol

You gotta have your mom call the St. Bernard Project.
This is the website and it lists a phone number. I know its only for St. Bernard, but still have her call. They will help her anyway they can. The people associated with this organization do wonders.
http://www.stbernardproject.org/v158/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=2&Itemid=43

This is Camp Hope. Have her call them to. Volunteers and organizations come in from all over the world and stay here. Its one of the main volunteer camps. She can talk to someone and they can guide her for who to speak too.
http://www.habitat-nola.org/projects/st_bernard.php

I bet your mom would get help.

Yeah the water. St Bernard is pretty much in Lake Borgne and the gulf now. At least we finally after all these years got the MRGO closed to any more traffic. They are suppose to build some barriers in the MRGO in a few different places. Its suppose to keep the water from the outlet going into that cone and into the industrail canal. This way it will only flood St. Bernard and the 9th again. But New Orleans wont get any water. At least thats what they say. Doesnt help us any, but does others.

Yeah, i know. 'da Parish just ain't 'da Parish no more. It ain't 'dere no more. Every single family has been broken up its no longer got the 'home' feeling.

I think if i had at least one of my friends still here i'd feel a little better, but it just didnt work out that way. They had to do what they had to do.

I'm not sure what i'm goig to do in the future, but for now i'm stuck. Don't hate me for saying this, but i honestly wish another storm would come and wipe St. Bernard out. I am the only one here for my parents and i feel obligated to stay with them since they are up in age. If we get it again, there wont be a st Bernard to come home to. So moving for sure would be in the picture and i could get them out in Picayune near there friends.

I'm going to Florida to see a friend in October. My first real trip out of the da parish since the storm. Iv'e contacted two video editing houses where she lives and they've shown interest in me. Sent a reel to one of them. Don't know, but i might just stay there. But i would need a job and this anxiety has to go way way lower to hold a job. But video editing, being a passion of mine, I think it wouldnt be so hard. Just a thought.

Thanks so much Dinah. Its great talking to someone with the connection to home here.

hugs
chalmette

I think it's understandable for you to feel that way. You'd almost have to be a bit nuts not to feel anxious. The disruptions to the smallest parts of your life over a long period of time would make anyone stressed out. Even this many years out, suicide, child abuse, elder abuse, etc. have all skyrocketed even in areas less hardhit than your area.

I really hope you're able to get away without having to wait for another hurricane. (I really don't want to go through any of this ever again.) It's hardest for the old people. We lost two grandparents within months of the storm. They couldn't handle the damage to their home, the uprooting, and everything else. I'm sure your parents feel like they want to be home right now, but maybe when it feels less like home you'll be able to persuade them that home means the people, not the geography.

I imagine the anxiety problem would be much eased when you get out from the stressful environment. Even a trip away will do you good. October seems far away now, but it will be here pretty soon.

Thanks for the information for my mother. She's not well right now, but as soon as she's better I'll pass it on to her. She's pretty depressed herself and could use a little hope.

The volunteers have been great, haven't they? It's one of those things that make me feel warm inside.

Dinah

It's in Orleans Parish on the Westbank. In Algiers. Is there a way for you to get there without having to back out through New Orleans East and drive all the way around? It really is not very far in miles as the crow flies, but I know that doesn't necessarily mean much when there aren't that many paths in and out, and I'm lousy at trying to visualize geography.

Dinah

oh bummer. i wondered about that. it says there is a chalmette-new orleans ferry but yeah you'd need a good car i'm sure. supposedly it takes about 30 minutes to get there and it's directly across the river from chalmette.

some day i'm going to get to new orleans. it sounds like such an interesting city. i didn't realize things were still so bad for katrina victims. i knew there were a lot of problems but i figured people had the basics by now. i hope president obama will do more for all of you. take care.

call me crazy but i actually like doing research. it looks like the st. benard's project opened a mental health center in january of this year. there wasn't much info on their site about it but hopefully it really is up and running.

I was surprised to find out that if you call around to different pharmacies you can get huge differences in pricing. I called my regular pharmacy the other day and they told me it would be $90 which I could not afford. I called Wal-Mart and they told me 11.38. I then got a third number at 7.5. My pharmacy matched the 7.5 price and I got it there because they had the presciption but I will shop around next time I have a written prescription and buy from the lowest one. So, I thought I would share and maybe it will help someone else. I guess I never knew you could do this.

BB

Dinah, yeah the anxiety kills me. The sadness that comes from it. The entire community is gone. My church, school, favorite place i ate, grocery store. They've all been demolished. And a whole lot more, even some still sitting in ruins.

I know the storm took its toll on everyone. Especially the elderly and the kids. I knew 7 who passed in the storm and 14-15 (cant remember) who passed soon after. Alot were elderly. After going to the first dozen funerals i had to stop. I couldnt do it anymore. I know another storm would surely kill many more. And after last year with gustav and that other storm. Everyone evacuated and the worst we had was no electric and everything closed down for about a week. I hear so many people saying they arent evacuating again. Thats what happened with Katrina, why so many stayed. The belief system wasnt there. I know if one does come i'm not evacuating. I survive it, i'll move. I dont' survive, well.

If your mom needs help let me know, i'll do what i can. I dont have transportation. But i have a phone.

I can never thank the volunteers enough. Everyone who helped in the recovery. Whatever they did. So much came in after the storm. I remember going to the makeshift donation tent and the clothes they had there. There werent any tables to put them on so they were laid out in boxes on a blue tarp (love those blue tarps). I sat on the ground and searched for clothes that would fit my family. I found this awesome wool sweater. I loved it. I still have it. But i accidentally washed it one day and it shrunk a few sizes. But it has meaning and i dont' want to get rid of it.

The volunteers who come down to help gut to rebuilding are great. They are so polite and hardworking. They ask so many questions about what happened, whats happening. I never personally had volunteers help me, but i've been at houses of my family and friends gutting myself and they were next door or down the street doing the same thing. So i've met many. And the Ameri Corp group i got to be friends with a few of them. My neighbor spent alot of time at Camp Hope and would invite all the volunteers there to his house for bbq's for the different holdiays. Walking next door and chating with them was a different world i never thought i'd be in. I remember when this one group from Ameri Corp was on there last week here. They stopped by my trailer to tell me see ya later. They gave me one of their bandanas that had their symbol on it and a little toy rubbery snake one of them caught in a parade they went too. Those two things meant the world to me. I still have the snake, but i misplaced the bandana and still miss it to this day.

I'm almost positive Our Lady of Holy Cross is in Marrero or maybe Gretna. I know when you get off the Paris Rd. ferry on the westbank you take the river road up about a mile then take a left and go straight. You pass that huge golf course on the left and its about 15-20 minutes to get there. And Our Lady is on the right. Right next to where that Old Folks Home use to be. Algiers is directly across the river from the Quarter. Right under the bridge. You take the Canal St. ferry across to Algiers Point.

hi reflection. Yeah the best way to get to Our Lady of Holy Cross is to take what we call the Paris Road ferry and you get off on the other side the river in Gretna. (Someone just told me that . lol) You pretty much go straight for about 15-20 minutes and your there. I just live about 3 minutes from the ferry on this side. But its the other side with my truck that wont make it.

You should come visit. The city itself is rich with history. The Madame La Laurie house is being sold by its owner Nicholas Cage and is known to be one of the most haunted houses in the Quarter. If you google her, you'll see why. Just don't go walking off the beaten path or where no one is at. Your just asking for trouble. And be careful if you take one of those Isabella bus/van tours. I've been known to throw my bike at them down here. lol. Long story and a few years back. I probably have it in another thread of mine. lol.

The people down this way don't want handouts from the government. Just want things to be done right. We'll take care of our own property. But alot of the older crowd need the help of the government and are to proud to ask. Even to proud to ask the volunteer groups. But they should cause those volunteers are great. They can whip a house into shape in just one month. I've seen it done. And it always seems something is donated like a fridge, etc.

I hope to see you down here one day. Let me know. I'll give you a personal tour of the bayou and of the French Quarter.

Hi bipolar!

Thats cool you got a deal like that. And big difference in prices. If i were to do that. I'd have to travel 45minutes to an hour to get to another pharmacy. We have the Walgreens down here. And i think Winn Dixie might have one. Then two mom and pop ones. But the Walmart, Target, etc are either in Jefferson or St. Tammany parishes. And it takes a bit to get there. Alot of gas. We go out those ways maybe once a month and its to really stock up on stuff we dont have down here. The biggest store we have is the Walgreens, so you can just imagine. But i might do that with the mom and pops cause i've been wanting to get rid of Walgreens for months now. I wonder if theres a way the mom and pops can still get you your scripts if you have to leave town. Hmmm.

reflection, i didnt know that with the st. bernard project. I'm gonna have to go back to their website and take a good look at it. I know the woman Liz who runs it got some presidentail award or something not to long ago. When the moron (sorry to offend anyone) was president. So alot of attention was put towards the project. She had said on tv that alot more volunteers are coming down here through her organization.

Sounds like the first year or so everywhere else. And this is four years later, and (with all due respect) may not get substantially better with parish leadership as it is. It's so different than anyplace else in the area because it's a small parish and it was entirely destroyed. In every other parish, even Plaquemines, some areas were relatively unscathed and were able to provide support and a revenue stream. In St. Bernard, there was such devastation, and that's hard for any government to handle if they aren't trained and experienced in disaster. I've been reading the paper, and you're right, it doesn't look good. They're now trying to limit the rentals in the parish because even people who've fixed it up aren't wanting to live there?

Don't stay in the next evacuation. Go, and use every resource you can to keep going. Your parents are free to make the choices they make, but you can't help them if you are in bad shape yourself. You sound so resigned. Don't go gentle into that good night. You do have options. There are people who even now will help you get a start somewhere else.

The parish will come back, especially now MRGO is gone. It's been there for forever, and it's not going to go away. But not everyone is suited to be part of a recovery. There's nothing wrong with that.

Ok, my mom hat is off now and I'll quit nagging. I understand the ties of home and family. I just also know how easy it is to start to feel like you have no choices.

Hi Dinah. Yep, only one way to say it. St. Bernard just ain't 'dere no more.

Evacuation is kind of a curse word. You know that. What you have to go through just to get out of Louisiana. 21 hours from my house to this little town in Alabama, that should have only taken about 3-4 hours to travel.

If i would evacuate, i'd be taking my tent with me. Can't afford hotel rooms and don't want to invade on friends. Which many will have to evaucate themselves. I just need to make sure my parents are safe. But they themselves continue to say they are going down with the house. We've talked about it, as every one else has done. And we are most probably staying. Can't take another one, so why put ourselves through the whole aftermath process.

All this cement from these slabs they need to tear out, they should go fill the MRGO with. Hell, the city, New Orleans East, here. They could do a good job of it. Have you seen the cement piles out in bay st louis, pass christian and gulfport? We could sure use that to fill the GO. But i know its never going away. Its going to do the sam thing it did before. For Gustave and Huberto last year it made it to a foot below the levee. And thanks Corps for fixing our levees. NOT!

Ah, you aint' throwing the mom talk at me. I'm use to all this stuff.

Thanks for talking to me about it.

Real good news! I just got back from seeing my counsler at family services. They've extended the program to sometime in September. So about three months. And she said she's spoken with her boss and instead of $45 an appt., she's got me only at $5.00. So $20 a month. I'll come up with it somehow. Its a hell of alot better than what i was first told. I'm also going to go next week to the self esteem group therapy. At least try it. I'm not the group therapy type, but she keeps reasuring me that its nothing like the AA meeting i experienced that one time down here.

I asked her if the pdoc is going to be the same. She said she's pretty sure that has been extended too. But she isnt sure on what they will charge me after its over. Thats something i need to speak to him about. And i dont see him till the 9th. So will let ya'll know what happens there.

Ain't this just killa! Yeah ya right!

Great news---I'm really glad that you've got a T who really has her head on her shoulders and advocates when need be.

That's wonderful! My therapist said family services was great. I guess he's right.

I hope you do evacuate, even if it's with a tent. I saw an acquaintance of mine in the paper having decided to stay in her home during Katrina. I don't know if I'm particularly afraid of death, but that's a death I'd be afraid of.

I understand the financial aspect. We haven't had a vacation in a long time because our vacation dollars go into the evacuation fund and got eaten by Gustav. I'm not sure my anxiety level would tolerate a state shelter. Although my inlaws, having evacuated at the last minute, ended up in one in Katrina. The people there really took good care of them, and were absolutely wonderful, until were were able to track them down.

I'm glad you're able to stay with your counselor. A counselor you know and trust is much better than a strange new one.

Simcha, hey thank you. Yes my T is nice. She really goes out of her way to help me. The best she can at least. When she had told me about the program and how much i'd have to pay, i think it honestly hurt her to have to tell me. But she was happy as hell to let me know yesterday 12 more weeks and only 5 bucks. She knew it would take alot of anxiety away. She was right.

Dinah. I hate the evacuation route. A hotel room with 7 people and two cats. A house for two months with 26 other people. A itty bitty two bedroom apartment with 5 other people and one cat. Then my trailer till i got in the house. Trailer was okay for one person. But me and my nephew, it was tight. He was scared to sleep on the bunk bed. So i'd pull out the sofa bed for him everynight. And my trailer seemed to miss the day they gave out mattresses for the bed, so i had to get another air mattress. Had to blow that thing up everynight, had a hole. lol

Well i was thisclose to staying the last time with my boyfriend. Knowing him and i then we'd have been drinking the entire time and once the eye passed over and it starrted to calm we probably would have crashed. Just before the surge came in. So we would have drowned in the house like so many. Just keep the attic stairs up, and drink alot. You wont think about it.

Family Services is great. At least they are one place in an actual building not in a fema trailer. The building they were in behind Lacoste Elementary was torn down with the school. So there new place is up close to Arabi, but still in chalmette. I noticed yesterday on their door they had a list of group therapies going on. I didnt stand there and read them all, but seemed alot. I know they tried getting me to go to one last year because of the drinking. I wouldnt go, so Mandy brought in a counsler dealing with that for i think it was about 6 weeks. I've since gone from a case of beer and bottle of rum or whatever i could get my hands on a day to maybe a beer a day, if that. I've had a few splurges. But i fight myself from going back...but yeah Family services is great.

Your therapist knows his stuff.