[WePow]

Ok - can therapy be a drug? :-) Seriouly, I know I am going through the trauma work and all that it brings - but I was supposed be able to not see T this week at all and see him next week. I saw him last Monday as a special session because of issues. Well I was not scheduled to see him until next Thursday. But I ended up getting an email from my mom that kinda wierded me out and triggered me. So I cried last night and sent T an email this AM and he is once again going to work me in to see him this thursday. As soon as I sent him the request - I felt better!! Then when he said he could see me - I felt a WHOLE LOT better!!

I am kinda getting annoyed with myself - but I know if T thought I was "abusing" the system he would not see me. He knows this has been hard on me. Has anyone else gone through this stage? Any advice or experiences on feeling encountered?

I don't want to be stuck needing to run to T every time I get a little upset. Just a ME thing. Urrrrr

[MissCharlotte]

Hi WP,

I have had quite a few "unplanned" sessions. They seem to occur less now than earlier in my therapy. I have been with T for three years now and also working through trauma. I would say it took at least 2 (if not 2.5) of those years to really trust T on the level of depth that I need to heal. I think it is a good sign that you are trusting in the relationship to help you change how you deal with these issues and to learn how to recognize the feelings that are aroused. There is so much hard work involved and it is quite individualized as to when we might need an extra session or conversation or contact in some form.
I hope you don't get too annoyed at yourself. Needing your T is okay. Trusting takes a lot of work. It took me a long time to understand that it is okay to need others, and that doesn't make me a bad person. I am trying so hard not to judge myself and my needs, but sometimes I "slip" back into those destructive patterns. Sometimes those of us who were abused internalize the experience of the abuser and think of ourselves as abusers. But it isn't abusive to take care of yourself in a kind and loving way and it isn't abusive to ask for help in seeking that care.

[Melbadaze]

street drugs do harm...talking about things with a T doesn't harm..you did an ok thing to contact T.

[sittingatwatersedge]

Originally Posted by wpowers

I know if T thought I was "abusing" the system he would not see me.

This is sound. the rest could just be "shoulds and oughts", yes? In which case, good for you getting past them and asking for what you need.