going weekly to biweekly...

I didn't mean to sound like some kind of zealot. I was just trying to clarify some misunderstandings about DBT because Zoo is currently in that type of therapy and she recently attempted suicide. I would hate for her to give up treatment at this phase based on misunderstandings. But I realize that her DBT treatment could be a bit different than the treatment that I was in.

No problem peaches, i just got carried away.

ive found your replies to be useful and informative, tay. i think that some people here who are getting defensive about their way of doing therapy and starting to name call do not understand how different therapy styles come about, get tested, validated and finally given the seal of approval. DBT is still a very new therapy (compared to something like CBT, for example, or even interpersonal therapy) so therapists are more likely to "stick to the manual" on it. standard IPT for example is meant to be "over" in 12 weeks also, which is curious to a deli who is (largely) a social recluse and goes into panic thinking she might be a social bee in 3 months.

i think the other thing to say however is that a therapist needs to use their clinical judgement, and it would have been very difficult to hear (for me, anyway) that therapy was so prescribed (under DBT, CBT or any other paradigm) and that "this is the way things are done", like i had to live up to some standard. i think zooey's T could have kept that particular piece of DBT protocol to herself (or made it very clear that it was dbt protocol, not a generalisation like it came across). maybe if zoo went twice a week her trauma work would be over in 6 weeks? or maybe it wouldn't, and what would it matter, other than to a therapist trying to do therapy by the book.

i like that you explain DBT, tay. i find the philosophy/assumptions behind it rather triggering and so i steer clear of it, but if i ignored the marsha linehan brigade and just looked to the techniques i think it would be marvellous.

I think it is a misconception to say that trauma work in DBT is strictly limited to 12 weeks. That certainly is not stated in Linehan's book anywhere. She does talk about doing exposure therapy in the 2nd phase of DBT for PTSD but doesn't give a hard and fast "rule" about how long it is to last. While the "textbook" DBT standard is usually 2 years, Linehan herself talks in her book about clients she has worked with for several years.

I guess knowing that as I do is one of the things that makes my situation with my T triggering for me. Because I can't help but feel like she doesn't want to work with me. It is just old, old stuff for me. Abandonment and rejection are at the core of what is wrong with me. I am just now starting to realize that. I have no idea how to fix it.

I have learned from reading here that there are many, many kinds of therapy and therapists, and that DBT is a particularly difficult, restrictive and regimented type of therapy. I also have no doubt that had I not come to DBT when I did I would not be alive today, and so I am fairly committed to it.

I have the constant struggle inside myself to run away from the pain of therapy and at the same time to cling harder to my T. It is incredibly painful and exhausting. I went back and found this old post of mine tonight and printed it out and will put it where I can read it as many times as I need to in order to soothe that scared, lonely little girl inside of me. It helps, a little.

Zooropa, I'm so glad you found that post and that it is soothing to you.
It really is awesome that she said that.
I also can't help but think that all this stuff aournd time limits and phone calls are not just obstacles to your therapy, but are really part of your therapy process.....to help you learn to identify and deal with the triggers...I can imagine it is exhausting, because it is hard work.
But you are doing a great job. Please don't get discouraged!

It sounds like you certainly know more about DBT than I have, but what *I* got from reading Tay's posts, was that trauma work doesn't take 12 weeks, but the Exposure therapy part of trauma work takes 12 weeks. (Which is a good thing because it sounds really intense. )
Tay herself said that she is still doing trauma work in talk therapy after several years. So maybe that's the key distinction, between talk therapy and exposure therapy. (Anyone feel free to correct me if that's wrong)
It may not be in Linehan's book, but it maybe it is taught somewhere in DBT T school - otherwise wouldn't it be a strange coincidence that both your DBT T and Tay's DBT T each came up with a 12-week rule on their own?

I'm glad DBT has been so helpful for you. I am really intrigued by it, especially because of how helpful you and Tay Quicky have said it is. When I was inpatient for my eating disorder, we did a lot of CBT and DBT stuff in group therapy. But since it all seemed to be lumped together I never really grasped the difference.

Anyway, sorry for rambling. I really hope this gets resolved for you soon.

)

ooh, that's a good distinction, darkrunner, thanks for pointing that out. That makes more sense to me. I will see if I can get my T to explain that to me a little better next week.

The other thing that keeps tripping me up is the idea that it's treating every trauma the same. So, an incident of stranger rape is treated the same way and in the same time frame as multiple incidents of partner rape over a course of nearly 20 years and the same as multiple incidents of csa over the course of a childhood. It doesn't seem possible that they could all be handled the same way and in the same timeframe. Maybe it's just me...