My termination experience

The fact that you were sharing this grief with your new therapist every session indicates at least some level of trust to me. Sure, there may have been some discomfort or distrust about your new therapist talking with your old therapist "over coffee" (not exactly the most professional therapeutic community you have there --sarcasm), but that would be pretty typical for a lot of folks, particularly given how your therapy ended with the first therapist (not exactly engendering your trust in therapists). Again, based on what you are saying, I don't think that either of these therapists handled your care particularly well, and I would encourage you not to blame yourself for their failings.

It is UNethical for a t to terminate you unless you are a danger to yourself or others, or if they feel they are unable to help you with your issues. THey are supposed to give you 2-3 weeks to process the termination, and assist you in finding another t, if that is what you want. The damage they cause is horrific. You put your trust in them, become vuleranable and then....they are gone.

Shame on them. It happens way too frequently.

P.S. Perhaps you might want to consider writing a letter of "restorative justice"---This is what you did, this is how it made me feel. He violated the code of ethics in abandoning you.

Sharon123, I have written him a letter, actually several. All were shared with my then-therapist, a few were sent and some were not. Each were written after specific encounters and reflected how the encounter made me feel in the moment. Grief is a process, much of what was written mirrors the stages of my grief.

I will not defend his decision. For reasons I will never understand, he chose to terminate. I may not like the choice he made, but I do respect it.